Jackson chews his lip for a moment. “Do you think Dad’ll check up on us?”
“No.” I shrug. “But I can’t be certain.”
Worrying his lip some more, he eventually nods and says, “I think it’s worth the risk. If we cut around past the back of Avery Street, we could walk across the field and sneak into the garage that way.”
“If someone spots the car, we’ll be in for it.” I glance out the windshield.
“Not if you park behind Big Walt’s rig. It’s always there on a Saturday, and he’ll be sleeping off his night shift.”
I muss my brother’s hair and kiss the side of his face. He’s always been a clever one.
We do as he suggests and trudge back along the field, staying close to the trees so we can hide if anyone drives past.
Thankfully, we only have to hide once, and the metal fence with the loose flap is soon in sight.
Jerking Jackson to a stop, I pull him behind the big pine and bend my knees so we’re eye level.
“This has to be our secret, okay? I need you to just… if anyone questions you about any of this, you need to zip your face.”
He smirks. “You want me to zip my face? How am I supposed to do that?” He mimes zipping up his head, pulling silly facial expressions and then dissolving into laughter.
“Don’t be sassy. I’m serious. No one can know about me helping out Michael.”
“I’m not stupid, Annie.” He wrestles free of my grip. “Of course no one can.”
I look into his eyes and know he’s telling the truth.
Spitting on my hand, I hold it out to him. He does the same and we seal the deal with a handshake.
It’s a gross tradition, but it’s ours and so I keep on doing it, hoping one day my kid brother will outgrow it and just settle for a gentleman’s handshake.
Checking that the coast is clear, I step out from behind the tree and get ready to introduce the most important person in my life to a man I barely know.
19
A Protective Lil Brother
As much as I wanted to split, I decided to wait until the cover of darkness. I can’t exactly go strolling out in daylight and hunt around behind that wood for the bag of money. I’ll wait until the town’s asleep and just hope that whoever popped his head into this attic space isn’t ratting me out.
Shifting my weight, I stay hidden behind the stack of boxes in the back corner of the attic. I have a pad of paper on my knees and am chewing the end of an old pencil I found on the bookshelf.
I need to write Annie a goodbye note, but I’m not exactly sure what to say.
It’s not like I want to leave her, but it’s in everyone’s best interest if I do. I’ve taken advantage of her kindness for way too long. It’s time to split and take my troubles with me.
Shit. The kid could tell anyone about the stranger in the attic.
I hope it doesn’t come back to her. If she gets in trouble with this Dean person, it’s going to be my fault.
With a short huff, I scribble the words:
* * *
Dear Annie,
* * *
I’m sorry.
* * *
I nibble my fingernail, wondering what to put next. I should thank her for all she’s done—for taking care of me, for waking up my soul.
What?
Freezing still, I think about that for a moment and realize that yeah… yeah, she has.
She’s the first good person I’ve been around since losing Deeks, and it’s woken up something inside of me. It’s because of her that I’ve been able to talk about the ranch again. That I’ve dared to remember it and all the good times I spent there.
She’s the light in my darkness.
My face bunches with regret. It would have been easier if I’d never met her at all, but then where would I be if I hadn’t?
“Probably dead,” I whisper, the words sitting like stones in my throat.
The attic stairs click, and I flinch, curling into my hiding spot and holding my breath the way I used to when Dad was on a rampage. I’d hide under the double bed I shared with my brothers, right in the back corner. It was my favorite spot, because he couldn’t quite reach me and he’d often give up, chasing down someone else to terrorize.
I feel kind of bad about that now.
At the time, I thought I was the smart one.
But was I just the coward?
“Michael?” Annie’s voice reaches out to me, and I crawl out of my spot.
Peering around the corner, I see her standing next to a young boy. The one who caught me.
“Why are you hidin’ back there?” She rests her arm around the boy’s shoulders.
I let out an embarrassed chuckle and get to my feet.
I’d put my shoes on and gotten all ready to go. They sound loud on the wooden floor after padding around in bare feet for the last few days.
“I wasn’t sure if…” I point at the boy. He eyes me up, and I try to figure out how old he is. He’s small like Annie, but also like Annie, his face holds a maturity that makes his age hard to decipher. He could be eight… or a small twelve-year-old.
He tucks his thumb in his jeans pocket and scowls at me. “I’m not gonna tell anybody.”
Annie grins. “Michael, I’d like you to meet my lil brother, Jackson.”
“Hey.” I raise my hand in a wave, but then images of Grandpa going in for the shake force my legs across the room. I extend my hand and he takes it, his gaze still wary. “It’s nice to meet you.”
“Thanks. I’m still decidin’ what I think of you.”
“Jackson!” Annie nudges him with her hip.
But his comment actually makes me laugh. “That’s the kind of thing Deeks would say.”
“Who’s Deeks?”
“He’s my older brother.” I hold up my fingers in a V. “I have two actually. And then two younger ones as well.”
“Five kids?” Jackson’s eyebrows lift. “That’s a lot.”
“Yeah.” I raise my eyebrows to mirror his. My hands dig into the pockets of Johnny’s leather jacket, hunting out the lighter. I grip it in my fingers and start twirling it.
“So, Mr. Middle Child. What do you do?”
I get the distinct impression that I’m about to play witness and this boy in front of me is a first-rate prosecutor. He’s got a charm about him though, and the adoring grin Annie gives him makes me think I’m in good company.
I take a seat on the bed and point to the nearby stool. “I have the feeling that I’m about to be grilled.”
“It’s only right.” Jackson walks to the stool. “You’re in Annie’s safe place. And only real special people get to come up here.”
I glance at Annie. Her cheeks are pink as she tips back on her heels and looks up at the skylight.
My lips twitch with a grin and I turn back to Jackson, figuring I’ll tell him as much as I can. There’s a protective edge to the boy, which makes me like him.
So, we talk.
I tell him how my brother and I were put into a group home after my grandpa died. Annie’s face tells me she didn’t realize I’d actually lived full time on the ranch. Thankfully neither of them asks what happened to my parents or how Grandpa Ray died, because that’s one story I will not be excavating from the back recesses of my mind.