Abbi
Last night when Jenner asked me to come to the set with him, I was so happy to see this part of his life. I wanted to see what it was like filming a TV show, but now that we were out of our bubble, the real world had stepped all over us, and everything had been turned upside down.
When Jenner walked out of his trailer without looking back, my heart dropped to the pit of my stomach. He couldn’t help the words that came out of his mouth, just as I couldn’t help my reaction to those words. We needed to learn how to not react, to let the person react and not overreact ourselves, but I had a feeling that was not going to be easy for us. The more I thought about it, the more I believed the problem was we’d both been in unhealthy relationships that had messed us up more than we realized. If we didn’t learn how to navigate our relationship quickly, we were going to sink before we ever took flight.
Unsure of what to do, I stayed in the trailer to work. Only instead of getting any work done, my eyes strayed from my computer to the door every few seconds. The longer I sat there, the worse I felt about how Jenner had left and what he’d said. I knew Jenner was likely now working, but I had to see him. Maybe if I showed him that I wanted to be here, he would defrost, and I could tell him I was sorry.
We definitely needed to talk.
Slowly, I walked to where they filmed earlier. Each person I passed looked at me with wonder on their faces. It didn’t make sense. Yes, Jenner could be an asshole, but I seriously doubted he’d done enough on the set to make them gawk at me as if I was insane for marrying him.
Not insane, just drunker than I’d ever been in my life.
But now that I’d had a few days to come to terms with my situation and had gotten to know Jenner, I wasn’t regretting that night or my decision. The only thing I regretted was not remembering any of it. Could Catherine have been right about someone drugging us? But why would they drug me? It didn’t make sense. I understood why it might benefit them to catch Jenner in a compromising situation and blackmail him, but I was a nobody with zero money to my name.
As I stepped into the warehouse marked 1B, I was surprised to see they weren’t filming. There was a group of people off to one side in a huddle, talking in hushed voices. I surveyed them and didn’t find Jenner in the mix. He wasn’t in the bed either. Turning in a circle, I found him close to the door I’d entered through on a couch and glued to his phone. It didn’t seem as if he’d noticed me when I came in. No one had, for that matter.
Now that he wasn’t busy, I was second-guessing my decision to come and find him. What if I messed with his headspace again? Was Jenner the reason production had stopped?
When I was only a couple of feet away from him, I stopped and waited for him to notice me standing there. I’d let him take the lead on how this would go down. I watched him for a couple of minutes before his fingers stopped typing on his phone, and he finally looked up at me. His eyes were lifeless as he scanned me from head to foot. Was this the way it was going to be from now on? I wasn’t used to being in the wrong, and now I felt as if I’d really stepped in it.
“Hey,” I bit my lip in an attempt not to cry.
Jenner sat forward, his hands dangling between his spread legs. “Hey, what are you doing here?”
I looked around to see if anyone could hear us. “I wanted to come see you. I didn’t like the way you left.”
He nodded slowly as if it all made sense before he rose and met me where I stood. With only a few inches separating us, I stepped forward and wrapped my arms around his stiff body, talking into his chest. “I’m sorry. I promise to try and think before I react.”
His arms wrapped around me, pulling me tighter, and I let out a sigh of relief. He couldn’t be that mad at me if he was hugging me back–unless he was doing it for the crowd. “I suck at this. When I said I was going to mess up, I wasn’t over-exaggerating.”
“You’re a lot better than you think. In fact, I think you’re better at talking about how you feel than I am. Who would have thought?” I nuzzled my face between his pecs.
“Not me, that’s for sure. Don’t take this the wrong way . . . ” he started but stopped when I pulled back to look up at him. We both chuckled at the same time. “I have a feeling I’ll be saying that a lot from now on, but seriously don’t get offended. Doesn’t it feel like we’ve known each other longer than we have? It doesn’t feel like it was less than a week ago that I didn’t know you. This one week feels like it’s been months, but in a good way.” He finished with an unsure look on his handsome face.
If I wasn’t feeling exactly the way he was, I might have been offended, but I understood what he was saying. So much had happened in such a short time. If you had told me when we were on our way back from Vegas I would be standing here with this man, hugging him and willing to start a relationship with him, I would have laughed in your face. It was unfathomable. It would have been more likely we’d end up killing each other than turn into lovers.
Not that we were lovers, but I had hopes of us one day becoming more than we were. I knew Jenner wanted that to happen sooner rather than later, but I didn’t want to rush it. I wanted us to happen naturally like the rest had over the last few days. It wouldn’t be long going at the pace we were going, but if a few days felt like months, it might kill us both.
Jenner dipped down and spoke into the shell of my ear. With each word, his lips brushed against my skin, sending my body into overdrive. “What are you thinking in that pretty little head of yours? You’re not mad, are you?”
Resting my forehead to his chest, I shook my head. “I’m not mad. In fact, I feel the same way you do. I’m grateful for the time we had to ourselves. In fact, I wish we had more before we both had to start back to work.” I lifted one shoulder in a ‘what can you do’ motion.
“Well, if they don’t figure out something quick, I might be going home early again today. I’m sorry you came on such a shitty day of filming. While there can be lots of sitting around, it’s never like this. It seems like most are still in their heads about what went down yesterday, and they can’t seem to find the right headspace to do the work they need to do.”
“I can understand that. Someone could have died yesterday.”
“Someone could die on set most days. Maybe they don’t want to be around me since it all seems to happen when I’m around.” He looked over to the group that was still huddled together. A few of their eyes were trained on us. “I swear I heard someone say something to me about being cursed on my way back earlier.”
For all his talk about hating doing the show, I think he secretly enjoyed it. It bothered him that people thought he was cursed.
Placing my hands on his chest, I looked up at him and told him my theory. “I don’t think you’re cursed. I think someone might be trying to get to you.”
His brows furrowed as he looked down at me. The curve of his mouth was set into such a firm line I thought I heard his jaw pop. “What do you mean?”
“Earlier, I was thinking about how I don’t regret us waking up and being married. I only wish I remembered that night. I’ve never drunk that much in my life. Not ever, and it seems strange I’d do so then. I . . . ” I swallowed the lump in my throat. “I don’t drink like that, and I like to be in control.”