“Diesel has a thing for you.”
That made me laugh, my body relaxing slightly at the light-hearted conversation.
“He’d fuck me, sure. But we’re just friends.”
“And Hunter?” She asked, trying to hide a smile and failing at it.
“Don’t wanna fucking talk about it,” I insisted, but I couldn’t help but smile back.
We headed down to the kitchen, and Lexi helped herself to a beer before turning to watch me as she plonked her ass down on the couch.
“So, you missed me?”
I chuckled, relieved to have someone with me for a moment, even if it wasn’t safe.
Technically, she wasn’t part of the crews.
“Of course I missed you, Lex. When did you even get out of lock up? I thought you had years to go on your sentence?”
She shrugged, laying back on the couch and putting her feet up as if she owned the place.
“Some cases got dropped. Since I was on my best behaviour, they let me out early too. One of the screws said some gang guy picked you up when you were released. Who picked you up?”
I shrugged, the memory feeling a lot longer ago than it actually was.
“Skeet did. He and Hunter pulled together a big welcome home party with the crews at the Psycho’s shed.”
Lexi was quiet for a moment, before speaking gently, pity in her eyes.
“Have you gone to see Slash?”
A sharp pain stabbed in my chest at the mention of his name, but I kept my face blank.
“Yeah. Twice.”
“You know I can read you like a book, right? You don’t have to pretend to be tough around me, babe,” Lexi replied, taking my hand and pulling me down almost on top of her.
I let her, craving to just be held for a moment, even though my body screamed in protest from the jolting.
“I know. I’m just trying hard to keep it together. You can’t tell anyone about the shit with Razor, okay? I’m handling it.”
“Handling it? By being his fucking bitch? C’mon, that isn’t you,” she scowled, making me frown.
“No, but I’d do anything for the people I care about. They’re my family, Lex, I have to do what I can to keep them safe.”
The silence was deafening, but Lexi’s fingers trailed through my hair carefully to relax me.
Fuck it was good to just be touched, and my eyes closed on their own accord.
“I know, but there must be another way.”
“You know when I got shived that first time in lock up?” I murmured softly, my heart rate spiking at the memory.
“Of course I do, you scared the fuck out of me.”
“Then you’ll remember that no one respected me until they found out who I really was. I earned that respect from things I’d done to protect my own. No one is saving me from this shit, I’m saving myself. I’m biding my time for a while, but it will change, I just know it.”
Lexi’s fingers stopped moving, and she tilted my chin up to meet my gaze.
“You aren’t alone, okay? I’ll lay low so you have me on your side. No one has to know.”
“Soldiers find out everything. I can’t risk you getting hurt either,” I whispered, making her smile slyly.
“It’s okay, I sleep with my blade like I assume you do too. Let’s watch a movie and snuggle. I’ll get more beer.”
I guessed it would be okay for a little while.
We spent the night curled up in my bed, catching up more than actually watching the movies, and I had to admit it was good to see her again.
She’d been my best friend for most of my time in lock up, so we had each other’s back pretty well when we needed to.
Her fingers drew circles on my tender skin, and I wasn’t surprised when she groaned, running her gaze over my bruised shoulder.
“So, the Soldiers beat you to shit, and somehow it looks hot on you. Are you too sore to fuck?”
I chuckled, wincing at the sharp pain in my ribs.
“Yeah, too sore for that shit. You’d have a new prison wife now anyway, wouldn’t you?”
“As if, Donovan. You know you’re my bitch,” she joked, going back to softly running her fingers through my hair again.
I stopped her hand, kissing her wrist before lacing my fingers with hers and giving it a small squeeze.
“You and I are going to run this shit one day, you watch. They think this is a man’s world, but they’ve got another thing coming.”
Her expression softened as she leaned down and kissed my bruised cheek.
“I’ve got you, Donovan. Let’s burn this mother fucker to the ground.”
“It’s fucking Monday night, Razor. I have school in the morning,” I growled, yanking back against the tight grip he had on my arm.
He kept dragging me into the Soldier’s shed, pulling me down onto his lap once we got to the main bar room, ignoring my pained noise as my bruised body jolted.
Saturday night seemed like a long time ago, but my body proved otherwise.
I hurt like hell.
“I don’t give a fuck, call in sick. You have to be at these things, and you know it,” he warned in a low voice, keeping an arm around me tight enough to make me feel uncomfortable.
“I don’t give a fuck about your crew party,” I bit out, his arm tightening more to the point of pain.
“Then start giving a fuck and just smile. We’re pretending to play nice, remember?” He chuckled, kissing my cheek to show fake affection.
His guys knew we were a sham, so I didn’t understand what he was trying to pull off.
I watched the crew through the night, taking notes on any obvious weaknesses and who was closer to who, but my stomach dropped when Razor suddenly stood and yanked me up, shoving me towards a table in the middle of the room.
“Well, I guess everyone’s here by now. Drop your pants, sunshine.”
I spun around and stared at him, familiar fear rolling through me.
“What?” I asked, my voice shaking a fraction.
“You heard me. Get your fucking pants off and get your tight cunt out for me,” he snapped, my body aching as I straightened up sharply.
He’d taken everything else from me, he wasn’t taking that too.
“Like fuck, asshole,” I seethed, trying to sound stronger than I was.
Inside, panic was consuming me.
“Fine. We do this the fucking hard way then,” he grinned with pleasure, startling me as two of his crew members suddenly grabbed an arm each and turned me around, slamming my chest down into the table and holding me there.
Panic overrode the pain in my body as I glanced over my shoulder at Razor, pleading with my eyes.
I didn’t give a fuck if I looked weak, I had to make him stop.
“Razor, don’t do this. I’ve done everything you asked me to!”
“Why shouldn’t I? I own you, remember? That tight cunt is mine,” he laughed with amusement, making a few others chuckle from close by.
Some didn’t look happy about it, but it didn’t matter.
They wouldn’t stop him, I was on my fucking own again.
“Can’t it be like the other week when we just drank beer and ate dinner together? Why can’t it stay like that? You said this shit wouldn’t fucking happen! You promised me!” I screamed at him, my lungs burning as I choked down tears.