"Hmm," I smiled at the thought of the memory.
"Henry cheered me up too. He's good at making people laugh. Remember when I was going to a Girl Scout meeting and I fell in the mud in my new uniform?"
"Oh yeah." My heart dropped. Mom had been so mad at Andrea for ruining her new uniform. It had been the only time I'd seen Mom mad at her.
"Henry was walking by on his way to basketball practice. He pulled me out of the mud and gave me some gum he had in his backpack. And not just one piece, either. The entire pack!"
I laughed. "Henry was never without gum."
"And he bought ten boxes of cookies from me when I was selling them. It was my best order ever. He was my best Girl Scout cookie customer."
"He really was. You know, he always gave me two boxes of the cheddar crackers. He told me he didn't want to be the only one getting fat off your cookies."
We laughed at the memory and talking about Henry made me feel better.
"And 'Melia, don't forget when Jasper had to go out of town during homecoming week."
I remembered. I'd already bought a new dress and shoes. Jasper had promised to take me, and at the last minute he had to go out of town for sales management training for his job.
"Emelia, Henry turned your frown around when he took you to the dance. Even though he was going to stay home and watch a movie for a paper he had due on Monday."
I smiled. "Oh yeah. Henry was the best friend a girl could ever have."
"You came home from the dance twirling around the living room and singing a song you love. Oh, what was it?" She snapped her fingers.
"Dancing in the Moonlight. Yeah, it was the last dance at homecoming. That turned out to be a great night." I could still see how handsome he'd been in his black dress pants and blue tie.
"See? Henry always knew how to cheer you up. And me too. If he were here now, he'd have you smiling in no time." Her eyes looked a little dreamy. Did she have a little crush on Henry?
"Sis, can't you see the smile on my face now?" I tickled her belly and she laughed. "You put this smile here."
"Yeah, I guess I did."
"Thanks Andrea."
She smiled. "Where is Henry? He doesn't visit anymore."
"He went to college, remember?"
"Duh." She scowled at me. "But I guess I thought he'd come and visit us when he visits his parents."
"Oh, his parents moved to Arizona. Or Colorado. Or maybe Nevada? I don't know. Henry never told me." I shrugged.
Andrea let out a big sigh. "Emelia, why wasn't Henry your boyfriend instead of Jasper? Jasper never made you laugh or smile like Henry did. And he wasn't very nice to me." She crossed her arms.
My heart clutched. "Henry was my best guy friend. Not my boyfriend." The memory from graduation flooded back. The way he'd held my hand and looked at me; nobody had ever looked at me with such intensity. How could I have known how he felt? How could I have betrayed Jasper at that point? We'd been friends for so long, and I hadn't thought of him as anything more.
"Phillip says Mom is his best friend. They love each other. Why couldn't you and Henry love each other?"
"We did. As friends. But just friends."
Andrea grabbed both sides of her head. "All this relationship stuff is so confusing."
"It is, you're right. So don't rush into any relationships." I wagged my finger at her.
"Don't worry, I won't. Who needs it?" She stood, adjusted her skirt, and pulled up her knee socks. "I have to go." She waved. I blew her a kiss, which she caught and tucked into her pocket.
She never missed a kiss. I guess it was our thing.
Andrea never missed anything else either. She got me thinking about Henry and why I hadn't heard from him.
Abruptly, the bathroom door swung open and Alexis emerged. Hands akimbo, she scowled down at me. "Why are you still here?"
I couldn't resist to say, "Peeking through the keyhole."
She pursed her lips, "You're weird. There is no keyhole."
"Hmm," I let her wonder what I was doing. Unlike Andrea, Alexis was a fifteen-year old mini Mom: distant, cold, and aloof.
While she stomped off to her room and slammed the door, my mind went to Henry and his whereabouts.
Time to play detective.
6
One Red Heart
It wasn't that I never tried to find Henry. I'd called information for Henry's number so I could wish him a happy birthday in October. There was no number listed. Social media sites weren't a thing in 1982. Cell phones didn't exist either. I'd heard from customers at Fly Buyz that Henry's family moved after graduation. They'd sold their home and moved to parts unknown, and left no forwarding address. I'd heard a rumor they'd moved west for the drier climate. Henry's mom had arthritis. Some of the gossip around town was they'd owed a lot of money and left town. Others gossiped they'd gone bankrupt paying for Henry's college education. Some figured they'd sold their home to pay for it. Henry was the Fitches only child. A late-in-life baby my mom called him. I didn't know his parents. Henry had never invited me to his house. We only hung out at school or on my porch mostly. He'd never mentioned any other family and I never thought to ask.
I started my search for Henry the next day, after I caught up on some much-needed sleep. I'd slept the rest of the morning and all afternoon. The mirror revealed swollen, red eyes when I awoke. The smell of something good cooking wafted up the stairs.
I covered my swollen eyes the best I could with concealer and powder, then doused my eyes with Visine. I headed downstairs to see what was cooking. Mom and Phillip were at the small kitchenette set with bowls in front of them. I inhaled, "Mmm, smells good."
"Mom's chili." Phillip wiped his mouth with his napkin.
I went to the crockpot and looked for a serving or two. When had I last eaten?
"There isn't any left." Mom never looked at me, she rarely did. I looked like Dad, I was a reminder of their failed marriage. Their loveless marriage. The failed attempt to save a marriage by having kids. How many times had she told me she'd decided to have my sisters and me to save her marriage to Dad? Enough to burn the words into my mind permanently. It’s sad when you realize your fate was determined before you exited the womb. Created to save a loveless marriage and doomed to a loveless childhood. No matter what I did, I didn’t stand a chance. I would never be good enough. Never measure up. And never be loved. She was indifferent to my presence. We were little unwanted critters stored in the attic bedrooms, like in that book everyone was reading. Maybe if she hadn't been pressured by her church to fix the marriage, as though it only takes one to save a marriage, she would have gotten a divorce sooner and had a happier life. And not been stuck with three failed attempts to make her life better. I couldn't be mad at her, she'd tried her best. I remembered the time at church when people whispered about her and stared at her. Her counseling sessions with her pastor hadn't been confidential as she had thought they would be. I remember her crying all the way home. I wasn't very old but I knew about bullies from school. And I knew my mom had been bullied.