“Merry Christmas, Sam.”
We snuggle into each other and I realize I got him some sweaters and a couple of cute tee shirts for Christmas, and he gave me a house.
“I want to pay for my half.” I stop us from walking and give him a serious look.
He smiles at me, almost as if he’s confused by the comment. “There’s no half, Lil. It’s yours. And it’s ours. And there’s no half. I’m not cutting things in half. I want you to jump with both your feet into this, not dip your toes. I’m not Rod. You don’t need to have your money kept safe somewhere in case you have to leave.”
He knows me too well.
“I like financial independence, Sam.”
“Well, I like the idea that you’re an accountant and you can take care of my money and yours and call it ours.” He laughs and kisses the side of my head. “Like the house and the cat.” He gives me a side-glance. “And the life. Ours.”
I want to torment him and say Romeo is all mine, but the reality is he likes Sam better than he does me. It’s a soul-crushing truth I will never admit aloud.
“Fine. Ours it is.” I snuggle into him, sucking in whatever it is that I find there. He fills me up.
It’s strange getting everything I want for Christmas. It’s my first year experiencing this. I got the guy, the cat, the house, and me. I love who I am right now. I feel strong and worthy and happy.
And the best part of all is, he thinks he’s the lucky one.
Epilogue
December 24, 2021
One year later
Halifax, NS
Sam comes into the house with a small box.
“There you are!” I gasp. “Everyone’s going to be here in like ten minutes.” I lay a tray of appetizers down on the stunning farm table we finally decided on.
He doesn’t say anything, but walks over and kisses me, holding the box. It moves and I jump back.
“What was that?”
“Part of your Christmas present. I know it’s crazy with the kids coming here tonight, but we can keep her safe.” He hands me the wiggling box.
“Her?” I place the box on the white marble counter in the kitchen and pull the lid off. A tiny white face peeks up at me. “Oh my God.” A kitten, maybe about three months old, mews.
Romeo comes running to the sound of it.
“You are so sweet.” I lift her out and cuddle her carefully against me. “What is this?” I gasp at Sam.
“Her name is Luna. She’s three and a half months old and already spayed.” Sam strokes her tiny nose. “She was adopted by an older couple but the husband had a massive stroke. The wife is spending all her time at the hospital. She told me she was devastated but had to give the kitten up.”
“She is precious.” I place her on the floor so Romeo can see. Instantly, he is unimpressed. His back hair rises and he fluffs out to twice the size.
The kitten mews and he hisses. She cowers.
“Hey, be nice,” I scold him.
He gives me the look. The one that suggests he’ll do what he wants.
We let them sniff and stare and figure each other out.
“Thank you.” I stand up and kiss Sam. “She’s perfect.”
“Even with the kids coming?”
“They’ll be gentle. They’re accustomed to pets.” I roll my eyes. My sister has wormed her way into three cats and two dogs. She’s gradually becoming an animal farm.
“You excited?” Sam’s eyes glisten with mischief. “First gathering at the house.”
“It’s weird. I’m nervous about everyone coming in. There will be almost twenty of us with Shawnee’s parents. And I know we’re all vaccinated and the quarantine is over, but I still get uncomfortable with crowds.”
“You should see the hospital.” He shakes his head. “We’re never going to recover from that plague. But I’m glad we’re doing Christmas Eve here this year. We’ve worked hard on this place.”
He spins me and we stare at the mantel over the fire that’s flickering. It’s gas now instead of wood but it’s gorgeous.
The house is loved once again.
It’s no longer waiting for someone to move in and care for it.
We’ve touched and healed every square inch of the place.
And I think in some ways we have done that to each other too.
I’ve never felt so complete in myself and a relationship before.
I bend and pick up Luna as Sam picks up Romeo. His ears remain back but he relaxes when Sam pets him. Luna snuggles into me. I kiss her on the tip of her nose, and she makes the same face Romeo does when I do it to him.
I can’t win!
I giggle and reach for Romeo, petting him. He sniffs my hands and glares suggesting I’m a traitor.
“Before everyone comes, can I give you your real Christmas gift or do we have to do them together?”
“Is it something my dad won’t want to see?” I wrinkle my nose.
He pauses. “No, I’ll wait. You’re right.” He waves me off but now I’m intrigued.
“You can give it to me.”
“I’ll wait.” He winks and walks to the foyer, placing Romeo on the floor. “They’re here.”
He gets the door, greeting my entire family with the biggest hugs anyone has ever received. My mom lingers, enjoying hers a little too much. I hand the kitten to her so she can protect her and so I can protect Sam.
“Hey, kid,” Dad says, hugging me tightly. “Merry Christmas.”
I savor the feel of the embrace. I’ve missed this.
Liz joins and weasels her way in, getting into the snuggle.
More hands touch me and the warmth grows. I realize we are all gripping each other in a crazy family hug.
When we break, Liz wipes her eyes.
James gives me a hug, he’s carrying Lillian. “Happy Christmas, Lil.” I cling to him and her. She’s so big and I’m practically a stranger. Something I will hopefully rectify now that we’re free to be with everyone again.
“Happy Christmas, James. And you too, Lillian.” I kiss her chubby cheek.
“Aunty!” The bigger kids attack. I kneel and pull them in. It’s everything.
I’m struggling not to cry when Shawnee arrives with Anthony and her parents. We stay in the foyer too long. Hugging too hard. Needing the contact we have all missed.
2021 has been a much better year, especially knowing this end was coming.
Mom leans into me, stroking the kitten the kids have already tried desperately to hold. “I love that you’re finally living the true version of your life, Lil,” she says the right thing, as if it’s a Christmas miracle, and kisses my cheek.
“Thanks, Mom.”
We walk into the kitchen that is now a massive great room with the dining area and living room all open.
I stand off to the side and watch them. My family.
They’re gushing over hardwood floors and stunning woodwork and the kitten. No one has noticed the gifts under the tree.
This year the gifts look different.
They’re us.
Sam is leading a tour for Shawnee’s parents.
Anthony and my dad are engaged in a conversation.