Duan Jeffries glanced up when Landon walked into his office. “What are you doing here? You aren’t due back in the office until after New Year’s.”
Landon dropped down in the chair in front of Duan’s desk. “I’m bored at home.”
“Bored? You just got back a couple of days ago. And how was the cruise?”
Landon didn’t say anything for a minute, then admitted, “I wish it hadn’t ended. I met someone.”
Duan chuckled. “I would hope so. It was a singles’ cruise, after all. I think Zoe had hoped that you would hook-up with somebody.”
Landon didn’t say anything for a minute. He and Landon had not only been partners on the force but had also been close friends. Duan had been there through Landon’s rough days in getting over losing Simone. Unlike his family, Duan never pushed Landon to move on with his life. Duan knew how deep his pain had gone and had let Landon decide when he was ready to move on.
“It wasn’t that way with her, Duan.”
Duan must have heard the seriousness in his voice. “Then what way was it?”
“I fell in love with her.”
The silence that followed his words was expected. And though the way Duan studied him was unnerving, it was totally expected as well. His best friend knew him. Duan knew that he would not say he’d fallen in love unless he was truly certain that he had.
“You want to tell me about her?”
Landon drew in a deep breath and nodded. He had to talk to someone about it. He had tried not to let Monica take over his mind like she had his heart, but it wasn’t working. He hadn’t been able to sleep a single night since returning. All he did was replay in his mind memories of all those days and nights they had spent together. Seeing the Great Barrier Reef with her in that helicopter had been something he would never forget.
“Remember around nine months ago, I told you about that young woman I met in St. Paul?”
Duan nodded. “A woman named Monica Bennett, right?”
“Yes.” He wasn’t surprised Duan recalled the incident as well as the name. In their line of work, remembering details was important and Duan had a knack of latching on to even the most minute ones. “Well, it was her, Duan. Monica was on the cruise, working.”
“Working?”
“Yes. She’s a columnist for the St. Paul Star Tribune and was doing an article about the cruise. Imagine my surprise when I ran into her.”
“I’m sure it was a pleasant one,” Duan said.
“It was. We ended up spending a lot of time together. I got to know her, and she got to know me. She’s the first woman I’ve developed feelings for since Simone died. I figured there had to be a reason I had run into her twice. I’m not one to believe in fate, but I did for us.”
“And?”
“And all she wanted was a cruise fling. There are things she wants to achieve in life and has no intention of settling down anytime soon. I agreed to the fling but then I wanted more. But when I told her, it freaked her out.”
Duan nodded. “Some women are just as afraid of commitment as some men are.”
Landon stood and began pacing. “She has these goals, Duan. She wants to go back to college to get her PhD and doesn’t want to get involved with anyone until she’s in her mid-thirties. Can you believe that?”
Duan chuckled. “Yes. I went through something similar with Kim. Remember her dreams of going to medical school? I thought I would be doing the right thing by getting out of the picture so she could focus on those goals. But Kim made me see that when two people love each other, they can work through anything.”
“I believe that, Duan. But the problem is getting Monica to believe it. Besides, she doesn’t love me anyway. She told me that. Damn man. Do you know how it feels to love a woman, to truly love her and not have that love returned? That has never happened to me before. I loved Simone and she loved me. Why does love have to be so damn complicated?”
“Give her time, Landon.”
Landon rubbed his hands down his face. “I plan to give her all the time she wants. I’m moving on with my life. Rejection hurts like hell, and I will find a way to work her out of my heart and off my mind.”
“By becoming a workaholic again?”
“If that’s what I have to do to keep my sanity, then yes. That’s why I’m here. I need to get back to work, Duan. The sooner the better.”
Duan didn’t say anything for a moment. Then he said, “If you’re serious, I have just the case for you. It requires travel to Las Vegas for a few days, but you’ll be back before Christmas.”
“That will work. I might even decide to hang in Vegas for a few days longer.”
“And miss spending Christmas with your family, Landon?”
Landon shrugged. “It won’t be the first time I got caught out of town on assignment during the holidays.”
“But that won’t be the case this time and you know it. I’m not sure that it’s a good idea for you to spend Christmas alone. Why don’t you join us in the Keys. Terrence, Sherri and the entire Jeffries family would love to see you. Even Reggie, Libby and their tribe are coming in from DC.”
Landon knew that Duan’s family usually held a huge Christmas gathering at his brother Terrence’s place in Key West. He had joined them one year and had truly enjoyed himself. “Thanks for the invite, but I think I should probably be alone for a while.”
Hours later, Landon was back home. He was glad he’d gone in to the office. It had taken his mind off of Monica, at least for a little while. Tossing his keys on the table, he slid out his coat and hung it in the closet. Atlanta was experiencing temperatures that were a lot colder than normal this time of year, but he didn’t mind. He preferred cooler weather. Going straight to the refrigerator, he pulled out a beer, popped the cap and took a slug.
He had been glad he’d taken the time to visit his parents on his way home. Of course, everyone had wanted to know about the cruise, and was glad he had enjoyed himself. Although Zoe, who had been there when he’d arrived, had asked a lot of questions, he had refused to tell her anything, other than to again thank her and his parents for such a generous birthday present.
Moving out of the kitchen, he made his way into the bedroom where he was still unpacking. During his visit with his parents, he’d been able to hand out the souvenirs he’d bought for everyone.
But now that he was alone again, he couldn’t help thinking of Monica. More than once since he’d returned, he had been tempted to call her, but he wanted to give her space. Still, he couldn’t help wondering if she was missing him as much as he was missing her?
Landon glanced at a packet he’d left on his dresser this morning, then went over and picked it up and pulled out the contents. The cruise line staff had taken a lot of professional photos and he had bought them all. He’d given Monica most of them, but he’d kept his three favorite photos of them together. Looking at them now made him ache for her even more. He should just trash them, but he couldn’t make himself do it. He couldn’t toss away visuals of their days together, any more than he could forget her.
But like he told Duan, he would get on with his life...without her in it. He refused to pine over a woman who wouldn’t love him back.