Then—smack! I reeled backward, feeling blinding pain on the side of my face.
“Hey!” Kirk yelled, but I couldn’t see. I just knew I was falling—falling—until hands caught me, more than one pair of hands.
“Oh, dear.” A lady gasped from beneath me, and then an arm came around the back of my waist and lifted me back upright.
“HEY!”
I recognized that chest pressed against mine and started to protest even as I relaxed. “No, no. You’re supposed to be warming up.”
Ryan’s arm tightened around me. His whole body tensed, and he barked again, “Knock it off! NOW!”
He kept me cradled against him with one arm, his other moving around.
The pain started to recede, and I opened one eye enough to see Nick and Pete staring at me.
“Oh no.” Nick started forward.
Tom had waded in too, and he made a gurgling sound. If it was meant to stop Nick, it worked because his shoulders dropped dramatically. “That wasn’t Pete I hit with my shoulder, I’m betting.”
Pete pushed forward. “I’m sorry, Mackenzie. He’s sorry too.”
Nick hit his shoulder. “I was about to say that. I’m sorry too, Mackenzie.”
“Yeah.” Pete’s head bobbed up and down. “We’re both sorry.” They looked at Ryan, and if they could’ve taken a step backward, I was sure they would’ve. Pete gulped before adding, “Sorry, Ryan.”
“Fucker,” Ryan grit out, flinging a hand toward the court. “You hit her, and you’re causing a scene. Security was coming in before I told ’em I’d stop it.” His entire body was rigid, and hearing a threat of violence in his tone, I looked up a little more intently.
I wasn’t the only one.
Kirk met my gaze, and I could tell he was also slightly concerned.
I frowned, placing a hand over Ryan’s chest to calm him. “I’m okay. Honestly.” I blinked my eye open a few times, testing it out. “I can still see.”
Ryan didn’t respond as he wrapped his arms around me for a hug. He pulled me in tight, dipping his head down a moment. His lips grazed my neck, and then he released me.
He pointed at Nick and Pete. “Sit your asses down, and shut the fuck up.” Pointing at Tom, he said, “You. Sit.” He pointed on my left side. “Stop hitting on my sister, and if these assholes start fighting, use your face to protect Mackenzie next time.”
Ryan glanced at me for a second before leaving for the court. As he went, a few people patted him on the back. One guy pumped his fist in the air. “Bring home the win, Jensen!”
Kirk chuckled once Ryan got back to the floor and turned to Tom, adding, “Or next time just get your ass in here to help out.”
Tom sat, but he leaned around us to give Kirk a menacing look. “It isn’t my fault these two revert to being nine year olds when they’re around each other.”
“Hey.”
“Hey?”
Everyone ignored Pete and Nick, and Kirk rolled his eyes as we all took our seats again. “You should rethink dating Peach, and you know it. It’s going to cause problems with your friendship.”
Tom glowered at him but didn’t respond, and as if everyone had decided the excitement was done, we all turned back to the court.
A loud alarm sounded, and the players stopped warming up.
It was time to play.
Chapter Thirty-Eight
Ryan scored thirty-two points.
Twelve rebounds.
Six assists.
Three steals.
I was starstruck—and ashamed I didn’t have a Jensen jersey to wear myself. As the last buzzer signaled the end of the game, I was tempted to ask that lady where she’d gotten hers made.
“Fun, huh?” Cora’s eyes were invigorated, but it could’ve had something to do with her spending the last two hours holding Kirk’s hand.
I nodded. “Yeah. Is it always like that?”
She saw the jersey lady going past us down the bleachers and shook her head. “That’s a bit much, but it’s the first game too. This is nothing compared to state. It’s insane then.”
Kirk rested his arm around Cora’s shoulders. “You need a ride to the party? Are you going?”
I nodded, laughing. “I think I have to.”
I’d heard the warnings. I saw some of the excitement leading up to this game, but being there—my eyes were open wide as fuck. Cora’s whole heads-up about Stephanie Witts had a new seriousness to it.
“But I know Ryan will drive me.”
“I figured, but I still wanted to ask. He and I haven’t talked about the party.”
Tom had returned to Peach’s side after halftime. He’d left for snacks and never came back, slipping in with their crew below. Nick and Pete had stayed with us, but they were down there, talking with some of Stephanie Witts’ friends.
“They’re just flirting. You and Cora are taken.”
Kirk must’ve seen where I watched.
“No, I know,” I told him. But I’d never felt this emotion before, at least with these guys. It felt a little like betrayal, which was stupid. I knew that wasn’t what it was.
Maybe . . .
Ryan’s friends are guys. They want to get it on. I could hear Willow rolling her eyes. Just because they didn’t sit the whole time with you doesn’t mean they’re losing interest in your friendship, and no, Ryan definitely will not. The guy is gaga over you. I’d die from boredom from how cute you two are if I weren’t already dead.
I stiffened. Willow . . .
Yeah. Yeah. I can feel your disapproval, but guess what? I’m dead. I can joke all I want. She snorted. What are you going to do about it? Kil—
Enough!
I suddenly had to get out of there, and fast. “I’m, huh, I’m going to wait for Ryan down by his locker.” I didn’t know if they understood me, I spoke in such a rush. But I couldn’t take the dead jokes. It was too fresh, too raw.
She told me to remember her, to cherish her, and then let her go. But she was making that difficult. I could still feel her around me. Maybe she wanted to comfort me, apologize . . . I didn’t know, but I did not want to hear it. Not right then. It was Ryan’s night.
“Mackenzie!”
I heard Nick yell my name, but I pushed past them.
Fuck.
He was standing between Erin and Stephanie Witts, both girls I knew would love to be with Ryan. And there I was, literally running away from a ghost that was in my own head. This wasn’t Supernatural. I wasn’t a medium. Willow didn’t exist.
There, Willow! I half-shouted to her in my head, but half-whispered because I still didn’t want to hear her response. You don’t exist. I’ve analyzed myself and decided—you are dead. Make all the fucking jokes you want. I didn’t want to actually hear them.
Going through the doors and into the emptied hallway, I curled my hands into tight fists, waiting for her response. It never came, and slowly, as I approached Ryan’s locker, I unclenched my fingers.
I didn’t feel her either. She had gone away once more.
Feeling lighter, since she wasn’t sitting on my shoulders, I slid down to the floor. My back was to Ryan’s locker, and I pulled my knees up, hugging them to my chest.