She smiled, the barest twist of her lips, but I caught it. “Hayes and I are. He...relies on me.”
“I see.” I wasn’t going to give this girl another moment of my time. Giving her my back, I started making my way down the hall. “I’ll wait in my fiancé’s office.”
“I’ll be sure to let him know you’re waiting.”
“You do that.”
In Hayes’s office, I remembered the lunch in my hand and set the bag filled with Tupperware on his desk along with my purse.
Hands on hips, I surveyed the small room. I needed to look for my ring while I was waiting. Where to begin? The desk was large, with a comfortable-looking leather seat behind it and a wooden seat beside it. Two of the walls were lined with shelves. There was a narrow gap between the bottom shelf and the floor, and I decided to start there. I would expect that the rest of the floor would be swept and cleaned regularly, so if the ring had been there at any point, it wasn’t likely to be there now.
I got down on my hands and knees, glad I had chosen jeans today, and crawled along the length of one shelf. Phone in hand, I trained its light into the darkness beneath it.
Dust bunnies.
I moved to the next shelf.
Nothing.
The light picked up a dull gleam beneath the third shelf, making my heart leap. The gap was too narrow for my hand to slide under and reach it, though, so I stood and looked around for something to reach it with. There was a jar with various tools on another shelf — a ruler, pens, and pencils, what looked to be drafting tools. I grabbed one and got back on the floor, stretching out on my side so I could see what I was doing.
A minute later, my ring was in my hand, dusty but whole.
I held it in my fist and stood, walking back around to the opposite side of the desk as I wiped it with the hem of my shirt. Then I held it up for a look, curious about this ring I had no memory of.
It was an antique, with a filigreed band inset with diamonds and a larger square diamond in the center. Edwardian, my brain supplied. A sensation of dizziness assailed me suddenly and I dropped into the chair beside the desk. I looked at the ring again, and just like that, I remembered.
The plan: surprise him with our news.
The omen: doorknob, icy beneath my hand.
The insult: Her, on the desk where we’d made love.
The feel: of my heart breaking.
I remembered everything about that evening.
“I am yours
and I will whisper it
and shout it
and write it
and carve it into my skin
if only blood
would tell you
the truth you need to see.
I am yours
and I have never
been anyone's before.”
Tyler Knott Gregson
December 19│Hayes
SHE REMEMBERED. It was obvious from the pallor of her skin, her hand clenched white-knuckled into a fist. What was she —
Her ring.
Birdie opened her hand to reveal the ring she must have located. “I found it,” she said. Right where it rolled when I threw it at you a month ago.”
I flinched, then carefully closed the door behind me. She was going to listen to me, damnit. “I take it you remember.”
Her jaw clenched, and she set the ring on the corner of the desk. “I realize it would be eminently more convenient for you if I didn’t,” she answered. “You lied to me, Hayes.”
“Convenient? That’s not the word I’d choose. Easier, maybe. This wasn’t something I ever wanted you to remember.”
She gave a cynical huff and looked away. “I’ll call Remi and get out of your hair by this afternoon.”
“What? Birdie, no —”
“I cannot do this, Hayes. I will not be the oblivious wife or the girl you had to marry because you got her knocked up.”
I raked my hands into my hair and pulled. Hard. “You are not either of those! Damnit, Birdie. You wouldn’t let me explain things last time and it nearly got you and the baby killed. You need to fucking listen.”
“It’s not going to change anything.” Her chin jutted forward at a stubborn angle.
“Sit.” I gestured to the chair beside the desk, the one I used for student conferences. “Please.”
She sat, crossing her arms over her chest.
I took a minute to gather myself before beginning, during which time she looked at the ceiling above me or the door behind me or the floor in front of me. Anywhere but me. “What you walked in on was not what you thought it was.” I watched for a reaction, but she merely raised her brows in patent disbelief. I continued. “That girl...Serena Hansen. She’s the assistant dean’s daughter. I don’t think she’s ever been told ‘no’ to anything in her life. But I’ve been telling her ‘no’ for the past year and a half, Birdie. She’s been chasing me for all that time, showing up at practices, waiting in the parking lot, sending me fucking texts. Stalking my office. I’ve told her I’m not interested but I think I’ve become this challenge to her.” I was pacing now, several strides in one direction and then back, faster as my agitation grew. “I blocked her on all of my social media and the next day she showed up in my class. And was assigned to be my TA.” I stopped in front of Birdie. She’d released her arms.
“If all of that is true, she’s harassing you, Hayes. She shouldn’t be your TA, shouldn’t have that proximity to you. You need a restraining order.”
“But don’t you see? I can’t report her. It’ll cost me my job.”
She shook her head. “I don’t buy that. If her father would fire you because of her behavior, then you need to go above him.”
“I can handle her for the remainder of the time she’s here,” I said. “She’s a senior. She’ll be gone soon enough, and I’d rather not make waves. That’s just not how you get tenure. I just need you to believe in me. Believe in us.”
She had been leaning forward, as if the physical movement would help me see her side of things. Now she sat back in frustration, firming her lips. “I don’t know, Hayes.”
At that moment there was a knock on the door, and it opened without waiting on a response. Birdie’s expression tightened and I turned to see Serena hovering, innocence in the purse of her lips. “Oh, I’m so sorry,” she said. “I didn’t know anyone was in here. Are you in a meeting?” she asked. “I could take minutes if you need me.”
Birdie snorted and I just stared at her. She was delusional. “Serena, this is my fiancée. You met her just a few days ago.”
“Oh. Right… my fault.” She stood, unblinking, in the doorway.
“We’re not in a meeting, Serena. I don’t need your help.”
“It’s just that these are my TA hours. I need to stay busy, per the terms of the TA agreement.”
“Go sit at the front desk and be helpful to anyone who comes in the building.” My voice was curt, but I couldn’t bring myself to care. This girl… she was fucking up everything I cared about. She still hadn’t moved. “Go!” I yelled. Serena jumped and fled.
When she was gone, I scrubbed my hands down my face. “I don’t know what to tell you, Birdie. She’s an issue. I get that. I’m just not sure how to solve that problem just yet.”