“Uh...,” Jacob began, still confused by the behavior that she seemed to deem perfectly normal. But his stomach growled at the smell of the rich sauce, and he realized he wouldn’t have many other options at this hour. “Sure,” he agreed, joining her at the table. “Thanks.”
As he sat down and cautiously accepted the meal, the girl gave him a friendly smile before turning her attention to her own food. Several minutes passed as they ate in silence, Jacob eying her every few moments. He assessed the informal way in which she sat cross-legged on her chair, dressed in a black tank top and Superhero pajama pants with furry slippers by her feet. Despite the late hour, she was brightly alert, humming softly to herself as she ate her meal.
“So, do you live in Morgan?” she asked after a few minutes.
“Um,” Jacob started, his mind too tired and preoccupied to focus on her question. “Uh, yeah. 105.”
“Nice. I’m above you,” she stated, gesturing to the ceiling. “I haven’t seen you around before. Is this your first year?”
With an exasperated sigh, Jacob began, “Look, um...,” he trailed off, meeting her jade eyes with an expectant gaze.
“Oh, Jenna,” she answered when she realized he was waiting for her name.
“Jenna,” he repeated. “I appreciate this,” he explained, gesturing to the food, “but I’m not really in a... chatty kind of mood.”
She gave him a knowing smile and answered, “Understood.”
Jacob expected more of a fight. He anticipated feeling her eyes on him, appraising his melancholy state, questioning him with her gaze, but he found that the roles were reversed. She turned back to her food without another question, never looking up as he peeked at her. She politely ignored his glances, respecting his request for a silent meal. Once he realized she wasn’t planning to pry for an explanation for his somber mood, he relaxed back in his chair, finishing his food in silence and trying, unsuccessfully, to keep Sarah off of his mind.
Upon finishing his meal, Jacob rose from the table to toss the plate and fork in the trash can. He sighed deeply as he thought about returning to his dark, empty room with nothing to distract him from his thoughts. As unappealing as that task was, he knew it was inevitable.
“Well,” he started, “thanks again.”
“Yeah, no problem,” Jenna replied, watching him as he wandered slowly toward the kitchen door, lingering just inside to take another deep, calming breath.
“You know,” she called after a moment. He turned around slowly, returning her gaze. “I was gonna watch a movie in the lobby after this, if you wanna join me,” she said, taking in the last bite of her food.
He glanced between the woman and the clock on the stove, befuddled by her abnormal behavior for the late hour. He thought about her offer for a moment. “No,” he ultimately decided. “Sorry, I should probably get some sleep.” It was an excuse, of course, as he knew sleep likely wouldn’t come that night, but although the idea of being alone didn’t sound appealing, he didn’t know how much longer his emotions could hold up, and he didn’t want to have to explain any sudden tears to a stranger.
“That’s okay,” she smiled, tossing her plate in the trash and cleaning up her mess from the stove. “Just thought I’d offer.”
“Thanks,” he muttered, taking note of her genuine and casual sincerity. With another deep breath, he turned back to the hallway and made his way to his room.
Retreating to the bathroom, he brushed his teeth and washed his face to clear his mind, keeping his eyes safely away from the mirror. He had a feeling he looked as terrible as he felt, and he didn’t care to see if that assumption was correct. After he swapped his job-searching clothes for sweats and a t-shirt, he pulled his pill box out of the medicine cabinet and set it on the counter, staring blankly at the “Sunday” slot. He knew that his pills would make him tired, but he couldn’t ensure that they would keep his thoughts and dreams away from Sarah. As soon as he took those pills, there wouldn’t be any turning back; he would be alone in his thoughts for the rest of the evening, and he wasn’t sure if that was what he wanted. More accurately, he was sure that being alone that night wasn’t what he wanted, but the person he wanted to be with was probably sleeping soundly in bed beside Detective Mike Bentley at the moment.
With a groan, he decided he had no other options, so he might as well give into the fatigue. As he poured the pills into his palm, however, he remembered that he did have another option. It was probably a stupid one, as he had no idea how long he could hold up without a total breakdown, but he considered it anyway.
After a minute of contemplation, he shoved the pills back into their slot and walked out of his room, willing his feet to make their way to the lobby before his mind could catch up to what he was doing and stop them. Rounding the corner of the hallway, he saw the girl from the kitchen lying on the spacious couch with her computer on her lap and earbuds in her ears.
Deeply engrossed in the film, she didn’t notice Jacob’s hesitant approach until he was a few feet away from the couch, burying his hands in the pockets of his sweatpants. When she finally saw him, she hit the space bar on her keyboard and pulled the earbuds out of her ears, looking up at him with questioning eyes.
“Um...,” he muttered, shifting on his feet and trying to think of a way to phrase his change of heart. “I was just….”
She swung her legs to the floor, scooting over to make room for him. As he cautiously took a seat beside her on the couch, she pulled the earbuds out of the side of the computer, and shoved them in a bag on the floor by her feet.
Backing the movie up to the beginning, she settled back into the couch, easily closing the large space he had left between them and propping her feet up on the ottoman more closely beside his than he was comfortable with.
Sitting beside this girl and eying her dutifully, he wondered what her story was. Why she was awake at 3am, seeking the company of a stranger. But at the moment, none of it mattered. All that mattered was keeping his mind safely away from reality, and reveling in the distraction of the screen in front of him.
AN OBNOXIOUS BEEPING PULLED Jacob from his deep slumber, and he rolled over with a groan to hit the snooze button on his alarm. The very act of moving from his side to his back made him acutely aware of the massive pounding in his head, and it was then that he decided he wouldn’t be making it to his first class of the day. He rested his arm across his forehead, the light pressure taking away a miniscule amount of the pain, and cursed himself for eating so little the previous day. With that reminder, his stomach began to growl, and the mix of his empty gut and the ache in his head made him nauseated.
With another groan, he turned off his alarm altogether and rolled onto his stomach.
After an hour of trying to ignore the steady pulsing of his headache and wishing for sleep to take him again, his rumbling stomach could no longer be ignored. With a resigned sigh, he braced himself for the head rush as he rose from his bed and walked out the door in his t-shirt and sweat pants.
The cafeteria was sparsely populated, given that most of the other students probably weren’t skipping their first class of the day like he was. He ate a leisurely meal, checking the clock on the wall every once in a while, so he wouldn’t be late for his next class. The food was the same as it always was, but it had no flavor to him. It did, however, do its job of quieting the ache in his gut.