When he pulls away, he has tears in his eyes, which makes my own eyes water.
Bash says, “I was just about to tell Liv where Maniac is, if you can pull it together, Razor.”
Razor flips off Bash and rubs his eyes.
King sits in the chair next to my bed and says, “Hell of a story.”
“What happened?”
Bash answers, “Saint and King met with Agent Hill.”
The monitor in the room notes my erratic heartbeat. Enough so that Dennis pops his head in.
“Doing okay?” He’s eyeing the guys, though, like he’s about to tell them to get the hell out of here.
“Yeah. I’m good.” When he’s gone, I ask, “What did Agent Hill have to say?”
King replies, “He told us everything. How Jas came to work for the club. How you came to work for the club.”
My eyes water. “I can explain.”
“There’s no need to,” Saint says from the door.
He’s holding a large bouquet of wildflowers, putting King’s and Razor’s flowers to shame. He sets them on the table and turns to face me.
“We made a deal with Agent Hill. We turned Maniac over to him to be prosecuted. In exchange, you and Jas will be given the chance to start over somewhere new, all expenses paid.”
“I- I don’t know what to say.”
“Don’t say anything. Just think about it.” He motions for the guys to stand. “We need to go. We bribed your nurse to let us in here for ten minutes. Don’t want to piss him off.”
Bash, Razor, and King each kiss me on the head before leaving. When they’re gone, Saint stares down at me.
“I’m sorry I couldn’t protect you.”
“Saint-”
He leans over, brushing his lips on my cheek. “Rest, Olivia. We can talk later.”
This feels like a goodbye. I can’t explain it, but Saint is letting me go.
When he gets to the door, I call his name.
“Saint.”
He stops and looks at me, warring emotions on his face. But, I don’t have words. How do I tell him that I’m sorry for lying? That I would do this all over just to be in their lives. That I love him.
He smiles, as if he knows the train of my thoughts.
And then he’s gone.
31
Olivia
I’m in the hospital for a total of six weeks before I get out. The month of July has flown by as I watched from a window in my room. Bash, Razor, and King spend their free time with me, but it’s not the same. And I miss Saint.
Now, it’s August. I overhear two of the nurses talking in the hallway about how they’re glad their kids are going back to school. Which means it’s almost time for me to go back to school, too.
Dennis enters, carrying my lunch tray. We’ve become friends over the last month and I found out how he came to have a Devil’s Regents tattoo on his neck. His boyfriend was in the club and wanted him to have his mark. Sadly one night he had too much to drink and went out on his bike. He didn’t survive the crash. Dennis told me it almost broke him, but Saint helped him through it.
Dennis smiles. “You look like you’re a million miles away.”
“Just thinking of how most of my summer was spent in here.”
“That sucks, but I have news for you.” He grins. “You’re getting out today.”
“I am?” I stand. “Oh gosh. I don’t even have anything to wear.”
“I believe Saint is supposed to drop off a bag.”
“Is- is he the one who’s picking me up today?”
Dennis sits on the foot of my bed. “I have to know - what is going on between the two of you? I’ve known Saint for a while and I’ve never seen him act like this over anyone. But then I see Bash, Razor, and the oh-so-sexy King making out with you when you think I’m not looking.” He wags a finger at me. “And don’t give me the it’s complicated bull crap.”
“I’m with Bash. And Razor. And King.”
He puts his hands over his heart. “You may be my hero. What about Saint?”
“I- we’re not. I don’t think he likes me like that.”
“I think you’re wrong. I’ve seen the way he looks at you.”
I shake my head. “He didn’t seem very interested when I told him how I felt.”
Dennis says, “It’s not my place to say this, but has Saint ever told you about his past?”
“No. Why?”
“When I first met Saint, he was going through some… things.”
“Such as?”
Dennis looks me straight in the eyes. “His wife had just died. It was very sudden and very tragic. From what everyone says, it changed him a lot.”
“I had no idea.”
I think back to the rocking chair in his closet. But, maybe it’s not that far-fetched.
Dennis goes on, “I’m just saying that since then, he hasn’t been serious with anyone. Maybe he’s scared to get close to you. I mean, he’s already lost one person he loved.”
Saint
I back away from the door, my throat burning. Damn Dennis. He isn’t wrong, but it’s not his place to be telling Olivia this. I go into the men’s restroom, locking the door behind me. I haven’t thought of her in so long, but being here has brought up memories that I wish I could forget. Like how I let her down. How her death is my fault. How Olivia reminds me of her.
Rubbing my hands over my face, I know what I have to do. I send a text to Bash, Razor, and King, telling them we need to talk as soon as I get back with Olivia. They’re not going to be happy about my decision, but they won’t go against me. Not on this.
When I’ve regained my composure, I go out of the bathroom to Olivia’s room. She’s sitting on the edge of her bed, smiling at Dennis. I tap on the door.
“I hear you get out today.” I hold up the bag in my hand. “I brought you some clothes.”
“Thank you.” She stands. “Do I have time for a shower before we go home?”
Home.
I nod. “Of course.”
She goes to the bathroom, closing the door.
Dennis turns to me. “You heard me earlier, didn’t you?”
“I did.”
“I figured. I saw a shadow by the door that disappeared after I said the bit about you being married.” He pauses. “I’m not trying to get in your business, Saint. You know I respect you and everything thing you’ve done for me, but I have to say this. You’re making a mistake by pushing her away.”
“I appreciate your concern.”
He smiles, shaking his head. “That’s one thing I don’t miss.”
“Come again?”
“You bikers are too stubborn sometimes.” He stands. “Just think about it before you do something you’re going to regret. She’s a good girl. She can make you happy.”
“It was good seeing you, Dennis.”
“Some things never change,” he mutters as he leaves.
He’s right. That’s why I have to do this before Olivia gets hurt. Again.