To my readers…
This book takes place between Night Sky and Returning Home in my Satan's Sinners M.C. series. A part of this story first appeared in the Ridin' Dirty Anthology.
To the outside world, I’m Sonya Collins. I’m just a normal twenty-two-year-old woman, a college graduate, a friend, or a young woman who works at a clothing store. You always see me smiling, laughing, being happy, just like any normal woman. This is who I am.
To the M.C. world, I’m Shug. I’m the club whore, the sweet butt, the club girl, or whatever else you want to label me as. I'm the woman up for anything, the woman who lays down and spreads her legs, the woman who likes to party. This is also who I am.
I didn't choose the life I live in the M.C. world; I was born into it. I don't want to be a club whore, but it’s what I am. I don't want to live a double life, but I have no choice.
I'm not the typical club whore where I have this unrealistic fantasy that someday I’ll become an Ol' Lady. I’m indebted to the club, and I pay them back with my body. Maybe one day, I'll get out, but I'm not holding my breath. I'm not hoping, praying, or wishing for it. Does that shit really happen anyway? Like you can really do that—make a wish, snap your fingers, and then it happens. I don't fucking think so!
Could I ever really hope, pray, or wish that I would find that nice guy outside of the club? That he would come in to swoop me off my feet, carry me away, be my knight in shining armor like every little girl dreams? Could I really get my happily ever after? Yeah, fucking right. It might happen, that is, until he finds out that I'm mixed in with the Satan's Sinners and spend my free time as a whore for them. Then he would run away faster than me in a church. Get it? A whore in church.
I’m pulled from my thoughts when my phone starts blaring the song Fancy for the fifth time in a row. I figure it must be important because whoever it is won't quit calling, I may as well answer the damn thing. Grabbing it from my purse underneath the counter, I glance at the caller I.D., seeing my best friend's name across the screen. "Hello," I say as soon as I answer it.
She squeals into the phone, and I have to pull it away from my ear. Her high-pitch voice makes me grimace. “Tomorrow night, you and me, fair and rodeo, baby!"
Her excitement is contagious, causing me to chuckle. "Pudge, you couldn't wait until I was off of work to call me?"
"Fuck no, girl! What the hell's wrong with you? This is an emergency! Did you hear me? I said rodeo, and what does the rodeo have, Sonya?" She sounds serious, and I can't help except laugh harder. The days fair and rodeo are in town is her favorite time of the year.
I huff out a breath before trying to appease her. “The rodeo has hot cowboys."
"That's right, bitch! And what comes with hot cowboys?"
I roll my eyes even though she can’t see me, but I’m grinning like a schoolgirl. "Stetsons, cowboy boots, and those tight as fuck Wranglers!” We both burst into laughter, making me forget for a minute that I’m still at work. "Alright, let me talk to Ever and see if I can get the night off. I'll call you later. Love you."
"Okay, love you too, girl."
Hanging up, I dart my eyes around the empty store, quietly thanking God that I’m still by myself except for Demon in the back. It would've been very unprofessional for someone to hear that conversation. I’m grateful to Ever for giving me this chance to work in her store, for seeing something in me, and I will do everything in my power not to disappoint her. The other Ol’ Ladies are nice and all, but I know they only see me for what I am. Ever doesn’t; she’s different.
As for Pudge, I met her during our freshman year of college at Wichita State University. Neither of us knew what the hell we were doing or where we were going, and we were all alone. I don't know if it was fate or what, but we ended up as roomies in the dorm, too. We formed a fast friendship and have been mostly inseparable ever since. She’s the only one outside of the club who knows what I do at the compound, especially since I moved back in there once we graduated college. She wanted me to move in with her, however, since I have a debt I’m paying, I decided it would be better to go back to the Sinners. Pudge has never been to the clubhouse, and I wouldn't want her there. I never want her to see me in that lifestyle. Bless her heart, though, she never judges me or asks questions, and I love her even more for it.
I asked her once why her name was Pudge because I didn’t get it, she’s beautiful. She’s the opposite of me in every way, from her shoulder-length blonde hair to her sun-kissed skin. She isn't fat or pudgy, but she said she got the nickname as a kid when she was a chubby little shit, and the name stuck. That made me laugh my ass off; she's been Pudge to me ever since.
Seeing I have one hour left until I get out of here for the night, I decide it’s time to start checking the inventory. About halfway through, the store phone begins to ring. Stepping to the counter, I answer, "Lady Sinners Clothing and More, this is Sonya. How may I help you?"
"Shug, how is everything?" Ever's voice comes through the line. About six months ago, she got a cochlear implant, and while her speech is slurred, monotone, and a little higher pitched than before, it's getting easier to understand her every day. It proves she’s doing fantastic in her therapy, and I'm happy for her. I know writing shit down for me had to get old, even though she never complained about it. Now that she has the implant, she calls about five times a day to check-in. I think she mostly does it since she can use the phone and talk. She never had that privilege before. Ever has this brilliant kind of light that shines in her eyes when she hears a new sound or speaks to someone and never takes anything for granted when it comes to hearing. She holds it in, savoring it, reveling in it.
"Everything’s great. Demon’s in the back, doing the books. I'm about to start my clean up and finish the inventory. It’s been a slow night. I’ve only had a few customers since the last time I talked to you.” I repeat the same words I tell her every night before closing. "I wanted to ask you if there was any way I could have tomorrow night off?"
"Is everything okay?" Worry can be heard in her tone. I never ask off, so it’s no wonder she’s concerned. That and being the wife of Writer, one of Satan's Sinners members, has got to be stressful. I don’t know club business, but it seems like those men always have some shit coming their way.
I rush to assure her, "Oh yeah, everything’s fine. I realize I never ask off, but a friend asked me—"
Ever cuts in before I can finish, “You don't have to explain anything, I only wanted to make sure everything was okay. You work hard, Shug, you deserve a night off. Go have fun with your friend.”
"Thank you!” I couldn't ask for a better boss than her. She’s pretty amazing. “Are you at the clubhouse?”
"No, we won't be there tonight. X had a long day playing with all the other kids. He's down for the night." Ever's laugh rings out, and it’s a beautiful sound to hear. I admire her a lot. I bet Xander runs her ragged now that he’s crawling everywhere.
"Okay, I'm going to finish here and head over there. Have a good night."