Felix chuckles, and I smile weakly.
“I knew Tash’s friends would be as awesome as her,” Felix says.
Daisy runs over and jumps onto Tash’s lap, clinging for dear life. Ryder hangs back, looking on warily.
“Lincoln and Felix are visiting us for a bit. There are some silly people trying to take photos of Lincoln at his house, so we’re keeping him safe.”
Daisy tilts her head to the side. “Is it the paparazzi?”
“How do you know about the paparazzi?” Tash demands.
“I remember you saying how annoying they were when you were talking to Missy about the royal family one time. You know, when you said how jealous you were of Meghan Markle because she married Prince Harry. Except you didn’t like the way the paparazzi treated her.”
She blushes. “Okay, then. Thank you for that.”
Millicent cracks up laughing. Felix grins, and I give Tash a look of what I hope she understands is empathy. There’s nothing like children saying the wrong thing at the wrong time to make a situation awkward.
Before I can dwell on the fact that my own children are now far away, Daisy pipes up.
“Have you been making okonomiyaki? Is there any left?”
“I can make some more if you like.” Tash turns to Millicent and Ryder. “Do you want any, too?”
“Yes, please,” they say in unison.
“One of the many perks of being friends with this one,” Millicent says, jerking a thumb in Tash’s direction.
“I know. Tash is great,” Felix agrees. “I’m starting to wonder if I should move up to this end of the country. The people here are so hospitable.”
“Yeah, but your life and career are down there,” I point out.
“I guess. Although Sydney is a bit of a cultural wasteland these days. I’m probably better off moving to Melbourne. But I do have a soft spot for Brisbane.”
Tash goes back over to the kitchen and starts making up more okonomiyaki mixture. Millicent joins her.
She glances over at us, and presumably thinks we’re too far away to hear her talking, but I can just make out their conversation. I pretend to flick through a magazine on the coffee table but strain my ears to hear what they’re saying.
“What exactly is going on here?”
“His partner left the country with his girls, and the media must have found out, so I’m letting him and Felix hide out here for a bit,” she whispers.
Her mouth falls open. “Seriously?”
Tash nods. “So, don’t ask anything personal.”
“What about his music?”
“I guess that would be okay.”
Millicent hands Tash a couple of eggs, and she cracks them into the bowl in front of her. I glance at Ryder and Daisy sitting in the corner of the room. They’re staring at Felix and me.
Felix turns to Daisy. “Hey, do you have any paper and crayons?”
She looks at Tash for permission to answer.
“Sure you do. In the cupboard over there.”
Daisy jumps up and retrieves them, dumping them in Felix’s lap and then retreating to her spot next to Ryder.
Felix starts sketching some shapes. I can’t tell from my vantage point what he’s doing, but he keeps looking at me and smiling.
After a few moments, he holds up his finished drawing. It’s an abstract sketch of me, and I have to say, it’s pretty good.
He hands it to Daisy. “I heard you like Lincoln’s music.”
She looks at me, embarrassed, but then snatches the drawing from Felix. “Thanks.”
Tash finishes making more okonomiyaki and serves it up, giving herself some, too.
The kids seem to get bored of hanging out with the adults and disappear off somewhere. The remaining four of us sit quietly. I have no idea what to say, so I continue to flick through the magazine. It’s a local lifestyle publication, and one of the articles is about Tash’s new supermarket deal. I’m about to comment on it when Millicent pipes up.
“Lincoln, tell me something that happened behind the scenes of Sing to Me that the public doesn’t know about.”
“Actually, it wasn’t particularly controversial. Everyone was really nice and encouraging. I think there’s a lot more awareness about looking out for contestants’ mental health these days. Not like when I was on Have You Got What It Takes? That was toxic. And even though the public voted for their favourite performances back then, it was mostly rigged. I didn’t know this until I was being dropped from the label, but production would turn off the reverb on contestants they didn’t like. That made their singing sound flat, and the public wouldn’t vote for them.”
Tash’s mouth drops open. “So, what were they implying? That they left the reverb on for you to control the outcome?”
I nod grimly. “Apparently.”
“That’s terrible. But also, I wouldn’t believe it was the only reason you won. You are super talented. Remember, I’ve heard you sing without any microphones, and you were still amazing.”
The edges of my mouth turn up slightly. “Thank you.”
“It’s true,” Felix says. “I hope you haven’t been holding on to that for all those years, thinking you weren’t as good as you actually are.”
I don’t say anything because I kind of have. It was hard not to feel like a puppet when I wasn’t allowed any input into my career back then.
“I think it’s difficult in all creative industries to know where you fit,” Tash says. “Even with the stuff I do.”
“Yeah, okay,” Felix concedes. “Even though I look confident on the outside, I’m always worried everyone’s going to realise I’m a total fraud one day.”
“None of you are frauds,” Millicent cuts in. “I’m actually feeling a bit inferior myself right now, sitting in a room full of creative geniuses.”
“Says the secret government hacker,” Tash teases.
Felix and I look at each other, impressed.
“Tell me how that works,” Felix demands.
Millicent obliges and fills us in on the ins and outs of her job. She definitely underplays how much talent is required for such a position.
We stay for another hour before Felix stands up. “I think we should go see if your house is clear now. And if not, I’ll go in and grab some stuff to bring to the hotel.”
I stand up, too, and smile faintly. “Thank you, Tash, for letting us hang out here. I really appreciate it.” I step forward and give her a hug. She freezes up for a moment before returning the gesture. I don’t want her to feel uncomfortable, so I let go and move on to Millicent, giving her a quick embrace as well.
Felix comes over and winks at Tash, also wrapping his arms around her. “You’ve been a real sweetheart. We need to talk more. Come and visit me in Sydney sometime!”
“I’ll try,” she promises.
We head outside and back to Felix’s car.
That was a nice distraction, but now I’m back in a reality I don’t want to face. Paparazzi stalking me, and an empty house I’m not interested in returning to even if I could.
What am I going to do?
FOURTEEN
Tash