“Because you keep your lube there,” Royce said as he pointed at the bedside table and Grant ducked and covered his head as the glowing, floating dildo became a giant, glowing, floating dildo.
“Oh, my God,” he whimpered.
“Are you freaking out because I saw your cute little friend?” Royce asked gently as he rubbed Grant’s arm. Grant’s jaw fell as he pulled back.
“Maybe…” He admitted and Royce snorted and rolled his eyes.
“Want to see mine?” He asked. Grant did but he shook his head.
“Thanks but I’ll pass,” he replied flatly and Royce’s lips twitched.
“No one would ever believe we’d be able to get by with a travel-sized bottle of lube,” he said as he stood. Grant gasped indignantly as he jumped to his feet.
“A little goes a long way and I don’t like to make a mess!” He countered as he stormed past Royce and pointed at the patio doors. Royce pretended to be offended as he strolled past him and onto the patio then spun on his heel.
“I’m sad, if that’s how you’ve been treating yourself,” he drawled with a wicked smirk and Grant glared at him.
“Fuck off and stay out of my stuff,” he said then swung the door shut. He heard Royce laughing as he returned to the pool and Grant’s glare darkened. I can’t get off now that I know that Royce knows! Or could he? Grant’s hand spread over the warm tickle in his stomach. The idea of Royce wondering if Grant was abusing himself turned the tickle into in an insistent throb. He took a few steps closer to the bedside table and he chewed on his lip as his gaze stretched in the direction of the guest bedroom. He imagined Royce with his “little friend”, thinking about Grant abusing himself and… “I actually think I could.”
Chapter 26
It was harder to sleep in Hopkins Creek, Royce learned. The nights were quieter and he didn’t have the sounds of a city to distract him. He’d find himself alone with his sins as he tossed and turned and begged for Grant to appear. Royce didn’t even care about getting off. He just wanted to know what Grant murmured about as he drifted off to sleep and if he smiled while he was dreaming or if he snored. Royce wanted to know if Grant’s skin cooled or if he was as warm and restless in his sleep as he was when they kissed and touched. What would he mumble about as he slept or when he was waking, before he was coherent?
“You fucked an actual prince on a yacht on the Nile,” Royce reminded himself but he ached to know if Grant preferred being the big spoon or the little spoon. “These are really nice pillows,” he noted but his head popped up when he heard the laugh. It floated into his room and Royce’s lips pulled tight as he rolled out of the bed. He tied the waist of his pajama pants as he rushed from his room then down the stairs. He had to know and he couldn’t sleep, knowing Grant was hurting. He slowed when he reached Grant’s office and paused to watch him. Grant shuddered as he mopped at the tears on his cheek and Royce forced out a hard breath and prayed he was doing the right thing as he pushed the door open. “Grant, are you all right?” He asked as he eased into the office. Grant nodded but he didn’t take his eyes off the TV across the room and his thumb jumped across the remote’s buttons.
“I’m fine. I get really lonely some nights so I watch this,” he explained. His voice was so distant and flat and his eyes were unfocused as he stared at the screen. Royce wasn’t sure if Grant was completely awake. He looked at the television as Marcy snuck up on Grant. They were young, in their early twenties, and dressed for what appeared to be a holiday meal. Another young man was doing his best to distract Grant as Marcy inched closer. Royce recognized the other man from a picture in the living room. It was Chris and he bit down on his lips as Marcy grabbed Grant’s shoulder and pulled a pie from behind her back. Grant’s miraculous reflexes came to his rescue and he swiped the pie from Marcy and shoved it in her face. Chris giggled and pointed as Marcy pried the foil pan from her face. The pan separated from the pie and it stuck to Marcy’s face, causing Grant to howl hysterically. That was the laugh that haunted Royce. It was so rare, Royce wasn’t able to place it. Something else caught his eye and he held his hand out to Grant.
“Stop!” Royce ordered as he pointed at the TV. Grant blinked as if he’d just woken from a dream and squinted at the buttons. The video paused and Royce flailed his hand, demanding the remote. Grant hesitated but his arm extended so Royce could take it. Royce rewound the video to just before Marcy tried to pull the pie off her face. He started the video and watched Chris as Grant laughed like a madman. He stopped the video and rewound it again. “Watch!” Royce whispered as he pressed the Play button. “Watch Chris!” He told Grant as he pointed at him. Grant frowned in confusion as they watched Chris watching Grant laugh harder than Royce had ever seen him laugh.
“What?” Grant asked. Royce shushed him as he rewound and started it again.
“Look at his face!” Royce said and they saw Chris’ eyes light up with joy and love as he watched Grant. Royce’s heart broke and he wished for some way to bring Chris back. He could see that Grant was Chris’ whole world and he saw two souls that were perfectly matched. As much as he loved Grant, Royce felt a bitter swell of grief as he saw exactly what Grant lost. Royce pushed it away and held onto the absolute joy on Chris’ face. “Look at how happy he is!” Royce demanded. He paused the video and stepped closer to the television. Chris’ eyes glittered and he truly glowed. It made the hairs on Royce’s arms stand and he understood. That was why he was in Hopkins Creek and why he needed to stay. “That’s his favorite thing. It’s everything to him,” Royce said as he touched the shine in Chris’ eye, on the screen.
“He always tried to make me laugh. He said it was his favorite sound in the world, because...”
“Because it’s so rare,” Royce finished.
“How did you know?” Grant asked and Royce was crying as he turned to him.
“That’s what I thought when I heard it,” he whispered as he went to Grant then pointed at Chris again. “He wouldn’t have wanted this! He’d want you to laugh and be happy. This would kill him!” Royce cried raggedly as he waved at Grant.
“I know,” he said as he nodded then shrugged. “I hate that I’m letting him down but he promised me we’d be together forever,” Grant said then unfolded his legs and stood. He went to the television and tapped the screen. “We were on their porch, but that house on the other side of the fence... That was my house. We met at the bus stop, before our first day of Kindergarten. Marcy showed up at the bus stop a year later and we had to be nice to her. I could see Chris’ window from my room and we’d fall asleep at our windows with our flashlights. We didn’t know Morse code but we’d click our flashlights on and off at each other until we fell asleep,” Grant explained but Royce could see that the three of them were peas in a pod as the video played.
“It’s still a little frozen,” Marcy grumbled. It was muffled as she scraped pumpkin pie off her face but Royce saw the bond between them. They were complete and harmonious and Royce would never be able to see Grant and Marcy together without knowing something vital and precious was missing. Royce shook his head as he reached for Grant and turned him.