He also hadn’t been able to verbalize why, as much as he’d wanted to spank her, as much as he suspected she’d be into it, he’d been unable to see striking her, even in pleasure, as anything but causing her more pain.
Hearing what she’d been through with Rob had shut him down. He wanted to see her bent over in front of him, and for a moment he hadn’t been sure he’d be able to stop himself. But he had, because he needed to make sure the lines between him and her ex weren’t the least bit blurry.
He exhaled. So…truth. He owed her that much, and more.
She sipped her cocoa, watching him. At that moment, even living a lie seemed preferable to being without her.
“You like it?” he asked.
“So good.” She dipped her fingertip in the cloud of whipped cream he’d plopped on top. The can had been leftover from one of the teachers’ many baskets and luckily not expired. “Compliments to the chef.”
He drank rather than spoke. Dark, rich chocolate blasted his taste buds, soothed by the wash of cream. It was good, but he wanted another kind of sweetness in his mouth. Another kind of wetness dripping over his chin.
He set down his mug, intending to grab a couple of cushions and a blanket off the couch. The uncarpeted floor was hard, and with the full glass front door only a few feet away, the room tended to get chilly even with the fire. But before he could turn, sure fingers wrapped around his zipper and tugged.
Lost in his thoughts, he hadn’t noticed she’d set aside her cocoa on the hearth and crawled closer. Despite her kneeling position, from the fierce expression on her face, she wasn’t in the mood to submit. Firelight carved hollows in her cheeks, backlit her sunny hair. She looked like an angel. A wicked angel he’d only dreamed of getting out of his fantasies and back into his life.
Regardless, he had to talk to her. To try to explain. But when the teeth of his zipper separated and she found only hard, erect flesh, he forgot all about baring his soul in favor of baring his dick.
Her tongue flicked against his length, little flames of heat meant to build his need. Leisurely at first, faster as he started to pant. She peeled down his jeans until they wrapped like denim bindings around his bunched thighs. Strangely, the constriction only made other parts of him ache more.
Her hot gaze caressed him, and his cock swelled, rising flush against his belly. Slowly, she brought the tip of him into her mouth. Her lips made the perfect vise, and her breath steam-bathed his erection while her bright blue eyes locked on his.
She drew harder, and he fisted a hand in her tousled hair as she swallowed more of his cock. His hunger for her knew no bounds. After all those months of pretending he didn’t feel anything toward her but friendship, all those times he’d taken a cold shower to keep from thinking of her mouth on him as it was now, he was lost.
The first time they’d been together years ago had been about missionary sex only. They’d had a bit too much to drink that night, and he hadn’t taken full advantage of having Kylie in his bed, figuring they’d have more time.
But they hadn’t. He hadn’t.
Finally they could make up for what they’d missed.
He grasped her head in both hands and pulled her toward his groin, urging her on. Begging her to take what he wasn’t even capable of voicing.
Kylie reached between his legs to palm his balls while she slid her mouth up and down until wetness coated his rock-hard length. The sounds of her devouring him filled the room, broken only by his harsh grunts. His hips drove forward, but she didn’t balk.
Her eyes only offered a silent demand for more.
God, she hadn’t been kidding about being experienced. In a minute he’d be growling like an animal. Fucking her mouth felt damn close to heaven, and he didn’t know if he had the strength to stop her before the gates closed.
With a groan, he gripped her hair and pulled her off him. Control was something he didn’t have. Not when it came to her. He expected her to protest, but she didn’t. She just smiled as if she knew exactly how good she was at rocking his world.
Still smiling, she feathered her fingertips over the black sun tattoo that spread its rays from his navel out toward his ribs. “Some kid dare you to get this too?”
“No. This one was all my idea.” He swallowed to try to alleviate his dry throat. “It’s a reminder. The sun always comes up, no matter how long the night. No matter how dark.”
“It’s incredibly sexy,” she said after a moment, her expression as soft as her touch.
He gave her a lazy grin. Last thing he wanted was for her to be sad—or to be consumed with thoughts of what she’d left behind. “Think you might have said that before.”
“All of you is sexy.” She encircled his cock with her fingers, though they had trouble stretching around his width. Her tongue darted out and lapped at the bead of arousal on the crown. “I’ve wanted you for months.”
The admission prodded his need even more. Already his balls hung heavy between his legs. How much longer he could withstand her onslaught, he didn’t know, but his hands weren’t gentle as he guided her lips around him once more. She was too good at this, and he ached too much. “But?”
She only sucked for a moment before she drew her well-used mouth away. “But I was with…him, and I thought it’d pass. I figured some of it was because I was unhappy in my relationship. I didn’t think you’d match me in bed, but that was okay.”
He chuckled, though her concerns about his prowess burned. “I was drunk that night in college. We fell into bed, and you fell out of it before I barely had a chance to touch you.”
“It wasn’t just that. You were so careful with me. I never wanted that. There was a part of me, one I couldn’t admit, that wanted to be taken hard. That needed to take someone right back.” She tipped her head back and met his gaze. The naked vulnerability in her eyes yanked his heart out of his chest and left him bleeding. “Part of me wondered if you’d changed. If we came together again, maybe it would be different. I could help you see what we could be together. But you don’t need my help.”
“No, but I do need something else. That gorgeous pussy on my mouth.”
She rose and gestured to the floor. Much to his pleasure, her face was as flushed as if she’d had an orgasm. “Lie down.”
A smile teased his lips. Seeing her own form in response—she had so many variations of smiles, and he’d grown adept at reading her moods from them—went a long way to smoothing out the rawness in his gut.
Bruises and scratches aside, she hadn’t been injured too badly last night. And Rob hadn’t broken her. Sexually or emotionally.
She was okay.
He lay down and extended his hand, winding his fingers around her wrist and drawing her down on top of him. Her hair fell forward as they linked hands, and she poised above his cock, her thighs widening just enough for the tip of him to flirt with her drenched heat.
Back and forth she rubbed, the fire in the hearth mirrored in her eyes. He felt as if he were staring into the center of a flame, the blue growing and licking at the dark of her pupils. Her palms pressed his into the carpet as she angled forward, dangling her breasts over his waiting mouth like low-hanging fruit. He sucked one peach nipple, dragging his tongue ring over the sensitive skin until he’d taken half her breast into his mouth.