Her eyes land on the table. “What is the last thing that you remember?” she asks carefully.
I can feel my brows furrow. I clasp my hands together. “I remember…” I chuckle angrily at myself. “I remember telling my mom about Lisa and my dad.”
She nods.
“How is she?” I ask, realizing how much pain my mom is probably in. My face is on fire from my anger, and thinking about my dad causes my fist to clench involuntarily.
“As well as to be expected,” Lauren says sullenly. I push myself away from the island and grip my head letting out a groan. I have to stop myself from kicking the stool. She says it’s been a month, but the memory is so fresh as if it just happened minutes ago. Lisa crying and telling me how sorry she is while parading the daughter she created with my dad right out in front of me. How my dad tried to explain himself to my mom, and me like what he did was explainable. As if there was anything he could say to justify screwing my best friend while we were teenagers, for lying and hiding it all of this time, for hindering my treatment for his own selfish reasons. The man who taught me about being not just a man, but also a good man, is a hypocrite, a liar, a cheater and a complete asshole.
“Chris, breathe.” Lauren’s voice is tight and high-pitched, and I realize my own breathing is erratic and how tight my chest is. She tugs my hand toward the floor to sit down, and she sits across from me holding my hand, her eyes not leaving mine. I focus on her eyes, her lips, her touch, and I force myself to calm down. The worst thing that can happen is to lose control and let Cal come back again.
“Deep breaths,” she says while her hands gently cup my face.
“I’m okay.” She nods giving me a small smile, her hands moving from my face to my sides. I close my eyes tightly for a minute and then open them and try to give her a reassuring smile.
“There are things that you need to know,” she says quietly, and I nod preparing myself seeing as how her face has gone grim.
“I know you may not be in the best place now,” she keeps her tone light even though her voice is heavy and it scares me, but I refuse to let her see it.
“I’m ready to hear whatever it is,” I try to assure her squeezing her hands.
“After all that’s happened, keeping secrets just doesn’t seem to work out for this family,” she chuckles and I can’t help but do the same.
“Go ahead,” I tell her firmly.
“When you left, Cal wasn’t the person who took over,” she says hesitantly, and I scratch my head.
“What do you mean?”
“I mean another alter surfaced,” she says hesitantly, her voice even but quiet. I can’t help but cock my head to the side and look at her in confusion. I laugh at first, but when I see her voice doesn’t break, I laugh again, long and loud and my head is shaking back and forth in disbelief.
No way. There is no fucking way! I can feel a frown locked on my face as she takes in a deep breath to reveal more.
“His name is Collin.” Her eyes don’t look at mine, and I throw my head back in frustration.
“Well, that’s just fantastic,” I say bitterly. “Is he as big of a jerk as Cal is?” I shrug with indifference, but I can tell my comment has irritated her and I can’t help but feel a pinch of jealousy.
“He was different than Cal. He was different than both of you actually,” she says with a small grin, and I feel myself frown.
“You liked him?” I ask surprised, that pinch from earlier feeling like a nudge. She rolls her eyes, and I can tell she’s irritated by the question.
“He wasn’t around long enough for me to know if I liked him or not.” Her cheeks redden. “That’s not actually the point right now. He seems to be a neutral party in all of this and what’s more important is what he did,” she says firmly.
“Okay, what did he do?” I ask her, annoyance flowing through my voice. I try not to grit my teeth, but it’s pointless. She takes a deep breath and tells me all that’s transpired after I blacked out. Apparently this Collin is the mediator and knows more about what’s going on than me and Cal combined. Just peachy.
Oh, and we can’t forget that he tried to extort Dexter Crestfield who turns out is actually my biological dad. Not only that but Lauren and my other dad had to stop Cal from killing the man who he thought was responsible for killing my mother when in all actuality she set up her five-year-old son to do the dirty work for her.
After hearing all of this, I feel like I’ve run a marathon. Her voice is calm even though I can imagine her heart has to be pounding a million miles a minute from the way her eyes dart between my face, my chest, the ceiling, and the floor. Her gaze sweeps over me after she’s done, as if she’s waiting with bated breath for me to react. For a brief moment, I wonder what Cal would do in this situation, what Collin would do. How can I really be surprised? After hearing what my dad, my hero did to my mother, the parents I grew up with and trusted, the actions of parents I never knew doesn’t surprise me at all.
“I don’t know what to say. I guess, Cal couldn’t handle finding that out?” I ask and her eyes widen in shock.
“Cal, couldn’t handle it?” she asks me curiously. I stuff my hands in the pockets of jeans I don’t remember buying. “What I just told you doesn’t bother you at all?” she asks, confusion littering her face.
“It does. I mean some of it,” I admit with a shrug and wipe my forehead.
“I thought all of it would be overwhelming,” she answers seemingly confused by my response to all of this.
“I didn’t know my biological parents—well apparently I do since my grandfather is really my dad. But what you said happened with me as a kid, I-I don’t remember it. It…” I trail off thinking how callous it must sound, or stupid even.
“It’s as if it didn’t happen to me. It doesn’t compare to what’s already happened,” I say quietly.
“You mean like it happened to Cal?” she asks unsurely.
“You could say that. I’m seriously messed up. In some weird way I feel detached from it, like it happened to Cal and not me, which is strange but it’s how I feel. Like it happened to someone else. I even feel sorry for him. Just the fact that Dexter Crestfield is my dad, that Dexter isn’t my uncle-in-law but my half-brother is what hits home.”
Her gaze travels over my face and I see her attempting to read me, but my silence seems to be testing her resolve.
I shake my head and this time I do stand and push the chair in frustration.
“How do I even sound? You’ve just told me that my mother got me to kill her and I don’t feel any way about it. Something is wrong with me!”
“Chris.” The color drains from her face as my blood turns cold the second I hear his voice behind me. I turn to see my dad standing with groceries in both arms, his expression is timid but he looks happy to know it’s me.
He shouldn’t.
“Mr. Scott, this isn’t a good time.” Lauren walks toward him quickly, her eyes wide as a cat’s. She’s obviously more intuitive than good ole dad here.
“What are you doing here?” I ask, my tone lower than I’ve ever used with my dad. He swallows hard in response.