“I miss her too.”
“I miss you too.” My first confession has opened a door of unspoken truths that I didn’t realize I would say until this moment. He turns around his hair sticking to his face, and his body a perfect vision with no soap hiding any of its glory. He looks at me with intense eyes, but I can’t read them. When he steps closer to me I get butterflies I’ve never felt before, and nervousness shoot through me. A grin spreads across his face.
“You miss me?” He smiles slyly his tone quizzical, but doesn’t hold the cockiness that Cal exudes. I swallow hard.
“Of course I do.” I can hear the hesitation in my voice. He steps closer to me, and I feel my back press harder against the wall behind me. I’m nervous, and he can tell as he laughs deep and low standing in front of me. He takes my hand and makes me stand up, pressing his body against mine, but something is off.
“Chris or Cal?” he asks, and there’s a glint in his eye that’s familiar but foreign.
“Collin?” I ask, slightly out of breath and his smirk stretches. I pull away from him almost sliding to the other side of the shower and slipping in the process. He grabs my elbow and steadies me laughing. I pull away from him and instinctively cover my body.
“I thought from that little speech out there, that it didn’t matter who I was. We’re all the same man that you love, right?” he asks haughtily. Leaning against the shower wall, my cheeks are on fire.
“Was that you out there?” I ask angrily.
“No technically Chris was ‘there’ if you want to call it that. Chris is all over the place right now, and your beloved Cal, well you saw the mess he was earlier. Those too can barely tie their own shoelaces right now.” His amused eyes sweep over my body, and I hug myself tighter.
“So what you said out there wasn’t true. There is a difference between us?” he asks with a knowing grin on his face.
“You know what I meant!” I tell him sternly, and I remember what he did to me the last time when he confronted Dexter without warning and unleashed Cal. “This is your fault!” I yell at him. He laughs at me dismissively.
“My fault? No, I’m not the one who tried to kill a man, or take a bottle full of pills to kill the rest of us,” he says stretching his arms over his head. I look away; staring at him suddenly feels wrong.
“No, but you went to Mr. Crestfield and if you hadn’t done that none of this would have happened. You could have given me some type of warning!”
“What’s happened wouldn’t have?” he asks amusedly.
I scowl at him. “Whatever this is.”
“You mean the psychotic break that ‘Chris’ had.” He uses air quotes and I grab the bottle of shampoo near me and throw it at him. He blocks it and only laughs at me.
“You could have told me what you knew.” I growl at him.
“You’re asking from me what neither Cal nor Chris has ever given to you. Why are so many special requirements asked of me?” He grins, but I refuse to back away from him this time. Even though I’ve only known this part of him briefly, he seems to be the most reasonable.
“I hoped that you and I could have a more transparent relationship,” I say looking him in the eye. His eyes remind me more of Cal’s than Chris, and without clothes on he’s much more familiar than when I saw him with a suit on and noticed how truly different he was.
“Tell me, what type of relationship do you want with me…” His voice is low and almost seductive. He lightly touches my chin lifting it so that I’m looking directly at him. He leans lower, so our lips are only inches apart.
I pull back from him in shock. Is he serious right now? Is this a test? I am so confused by how I am feeling. My body recognizes this man—it wants him—but after everything I said earlier, this doesn’t feel right. Well, he feels right up against me, but this wouldn’t be right. I can’t sleep with Collin. I don’t even know him, and his actions are confusing me. He drops my chin and takes a step back from me
“That’s always going to be the problem,” he tells me opening the door allowing the cold air to rush in. He steps out, and I’m left even more confused than before I walked in this shower. If Collin is here maybe he’s the one who will be able to finally give me some answers. I turn the water off and grab a towel to wrap around myself. I follow him and see him standing in front of our closet, the towel neatly folded on the bed instead of around him. I command my eyes to dart away. I sit on the bed making sure my own towel is still tight around my body even though he’s seen me completely naked. I think of how the last time he said he’s always there which means… I can’t think of what that means but my cheeks warm with embarrassment.
“You said earlier, that you missed Caylen. Was that true?” I ask curiously. This version of him seems so much more calculating. Collin reminds me more of Dexter than anyone which means he can be manipulative too.
“Of course it was.” He pulls out a pair of Cal’s slacks and a dark blue dress shirt. “She’s my daughter too,” he answers simply, and it sounds so odd that I have to laugh. I rest my head in my hands and ponder that notion.
“I may not be who you want here, ideally. However, I am the most stable now, and stability is what I assume that you’d want for Caylen?” I glance at him briefly and see he’s halfway dressed now.
“Yes,” I tell him honestly. Then I realize he’s not putting on pajamas or everyday clothing but a full on suit.
“Where are you going?” I ask him not hiding the worry in my voice. The last time he went out on his own disaster followed.
“We’re having dinner with Dexter and Helen.”
My eyebrows shoot up. “What? When did you set all of this up?”
“You’ve been asleep for most of the day. I thought we should probably get life moving along. I know you process things internally, but I prefer action through movement and accomplishments,” he jokes but his tone borders on condescending.
“What does that mean?”
“See this. The talking, the analyzing instead of actions.” He puts on his tie.
“I’m not going,” I tell him stubbornly. He stops and looks over at me, his stare so pointed that I look away from him.
“So if I didn’t invite you, you’d swear that there was a conspiracy going on to keep you in the dark.”
“I don’t trust them, and I’m not sure if I trust you. All of you have lied and kept things from me, and I feel like a pawn in a stupid chess game!” I screech, but he doesn’t flinch, he just shakes his head.
“You can choose to stay or go. Either way, I will be leaving in the next hour.” He walks to the door but stops before leaving out of it. “However, if I were you I’d like to be a part of the dinner with my husband’s newfound brother and psychiatrist,” he smiles and adds a wink for good measure, but it’s nothing like Cal’s.
I don’t know how he did it, but somehow it seems that we now have a white Bentley. Not a Mercedes, or a BMW, or even a freaking Ashton Martin. A Bentley. I did my best to hide my surprise when the driver brought it around, but it was extremely hard to do and even harder not to ask how he got it. I’m learning that Collin is extremely resourceful. The car fits him though, classic and arrogant. He doesn’t even listen to music but news radio, which is annoying but I really don’t want to talk to him. His hair makes him look like a modern James Bond, and I wonder if he was created based off Chris loving those movies. He’s clean and well-kept, everything is in place, and I grin to myself and decide to have some fun.