Mum was breathing hard and her back hit the edge of the bar, blocking our retreat. At that, there was suddenly an explosion of activity and I found myself in the middle of a sort of tug-of-war between my mother and Shay, while James was attempting to pull her off of me. Shay’s friends ran in and worked at prying Mum’s fingers off of my arm, but she was determined not to lose her hold. She kicked at the men, cursing and screeching loudly. Everyone else was shouting and swearing, too, while I, caught in the middle, burst into frightened tears. Finally, Aron managed to rip my mother’s hold from the sleeve of my pink parka, and James hauled Mum away down the hall towards his office.
She was screaming the entire time. “I’m calling the police! I’m filing a report! You can’t do this! She’s my daughter!” But then her shouts were cut off at the slam of a door.
Shay bundled me up into his arms and hurried to the back corner, his friends surrounding us. I bawled my eyes out as he took a seat on the old, brown couch, me in his lap, and he unzipped my coat and removed my hat before checking the arm my mother had squeezed the life out of. It was already bruising, and my jeans were ripped at the knee from when I’d fallen to the floor in the midst of the yanking and pulling. My skin was scraped a bit and one of the pretty club girls hurried over with a first-aid kit and handed it off to Shay. He cleaned the cut and covered it with a Band-Aid then pulled me in for a tight hug and kissed my cheek hard.
“It’s okay, Sweetness,” he murmured, rocking me in his lap. “It’s okay… don’t cry… Shhh…”
“Hey, Mina, want a chocolate milkshake?” one of the girls asked.
“And I have some nail polish with me today, I can paint your nails!” another one offered.
I looked up at the two girls, tears streaming down my cheeks as I took them in. I was a little wary of the women that hung out at the club ever since Dana, but these two were smiling with genuine warmth in their eyes and I thought I recognized them as regulars at the lounge, which meant they were safe. So, I nodded and they both hurried off to fulfill my wishes. Shay chuckled and gave my cheek another kiss before using the pad of his thumb to wipe my tears away.
“While you’re getting pampered, precious,” Cody grinned, “how about you watch me kick your brother’s ass at pool?”
Shay made a scoffing sort of sound at the back of his throat and kept his arms around me. My sniffles started to die down. “I’m sorry…” I whispered.
“What on earth are you sorry for?” he asked, incredulously.
“I… if I hadn’t come by, they wouldn’t have fought… I don’t know…” I mumbled, my eyes on the ground.
“No,” he said firmly. “None of this is your fault, understand?”
But how could it not be? During the shouting match, I could sense underlying threats and unspoken words being tossed back and forth that I didn’t catch, and all of it seemed to be centered around me, though I couldn’t imagine why. My mum wanted to leave with me, but for some reason, she wasn’t allowed to. Why not? And what had happened between my mother and James that had caused the arguing in the first place? This was supposed to be a happy outing, but now it was all one big mess. I had hoped with it being so close to Christmas that things would continue looking up, but now it appeared as though the fighting was starting all over again.
“Hey,” Shay said sharply. I slowly raised my eyes up to his, and he cupped my face gently. “None of this was your fault. Okay?”
“Okay,”
“Hey, cutie!” The girl who offered to paint my nails, Jess was her name, came running back over. “I have three colours: sparkly blue, this bright pink one, or a deep plum. Which one do you want?”
I chose the sparkly blue and soon found myself sitting on the couch with Jess and the other girl, Bethany, drinking a huge chocolate milkshake while the two women painted my nails, brushed my hair, and braided it. The boys played pool and ordered a bunch of food to share and after a little bit, I temporarily forgot about the fight and was smiling and enjoying myself, feeling lucky to be included with the older group.
It started to get dark before Mum and James made an appearance again. By that time, Jess was sitting in Aron’s lap, while Bethany was flirting it up with Leif. Shay was sitting on the couch with me in his lap, and Cody was sitting with us, holding my feet on his thighs. When my mum emerged, I noticed her eyes were red and puffy, and when she saw me sitting with the men, she curled her lips angrily. But James reached out and gripped her arm, the dark look he cast her as frightening as the shadowed one I’d seen on Shay earlier, and she bit her bottom lip.
“Mina, we’re going home now,” she called over.
“Mina will come back with Shay and I,” James said firmly, earning a look of pure loathing from mum. She looked like she was about to argue, but he gave her elbow another tight squeeze and she nodded limply, her shoulders sinking. I immediately felt torn and went to get up off of the couch. I felt a surge of protectiveness wash over me at the miserable sight of her. I wanted to make things better. I wanted to see her beautiful smile again.
“Mummy, wait, I’ll come with you-” I said and tried to move, but Cody and Shay held me still.
“No, Baby Girl, you will come back with Shay and me. Your momma needs time alone to think about what she did.”
I was confused. What did my mother do? Was it because of the confrontation earlier? I looked back and forth between them, feeling a bubble of anxiety starting to rise in my chest. Seeing my mother look so defeated, dejected, and sad was eating me up inside. I struggled again in Shay’s lap, but he held me tight and Cody gripped my ankles so I couldn’t move my feet to put on my boots. Mum’s eyes took in the sight and she shook her head and put on a wobbly smile. “No, sweetie, it’s okay. I’ll see you at home, alright? I’ll have dinner ready.”
“I want to come with you,”
“No.” Her voice, though firm, was full of defeat. She sounded tired. “I’ll see you soon, okay?”
I sank back and watched as she turned and stepped outside. No one stopped her from leaving this time. James strolled over to where we were all hanging out and smiled down at us. “I like the nails, Baby Girl.” He grinned at me.
“Thanks,” I said quietly. I was feeling guilty sitting here having fun while mum was obviously in distress, and I didn’t understand any of it.
James crouched before me so he was at my eye-level. “You’re a good girl, you know that?” he said.
I didn’t reply, just waited to see where this was going.
“You’re good. And you’ve always been good. We’ve always looked out for you, Mina. Always. Because we love you. You got that? We…” His eyes flash up to Shay for a brief moment. “… love you. We’re family. That’s why sometimes I have fights with your momma. Because she doesn’t understand that sometimes the things we do are for your protection and well-being. A family is loyal to each other. They stick together. Do you understand that?” I gave a small nod, but James seemed satisfied. “Good. Now, get ready to head home. I’ll get the truck warmed up.”
Present Day
Mina: Sixteen Years Old