“Sure. You okay?” the older man asked, his gaze darting between me and my sister.
“Yes. I just need to make a call please.” I maneuvered my body so I blocked Sibyl from his view. She wasn’t to be gawked at. She might have been my older sister, but she was very new to outside life, and no one would take advantage of her.
He grabbed a cordless phone and handed it to me. “Let me know if you need anything.”
I didn’t waste time. Pulling up the sleeve of my shirt was the number I’d put there earlier in black marker.
“Where did you get it?” Sybil asked, eyeing the numbers.
“Out of Mom’s phone. I don’t know why she had it, but she did.”
I punched in the numbers and then listened to it ring. My hands became clammy, and nerves sparked everywhere with each beat that passed. He was our only hope at this point. No one at home would talk to either of us, and he was one of the few we knew who had escaped. Got away from the madness.
The seconds kept ticking by as a ball of dread hit my gut, making it stir. There was no plan B. There was nothing. Not one thing. He had to answer the phone.
Please let him answer the phone. I prayed over and over again in my head.
“Yeah,” the line picked up, and a deep male voice said on the other side. I was usually never nervous, but I was for this. What I was going to ask him was huge, and I’d probably never be able to thank him, if he chose to help us.
“Ryker, it’s Cyrus. Jeremiah’s daughter. Do you remember me?” Please let him remember me. He’d been gone for so long, and there was a chance he didn’t.
“Yeah. I remember.”
A relieved breath came out, and a small bit of weight came off my shoulders. “I need your help. Please.”
That was it. He found out my situation, set us up in a hotel, and picked us up bringing us to Sumner. I owed Ryker. So much. So, so much. More than I’d ever be able to repay him.
“Does he know about Remy?” Ryker asked me.
My head shook. “No. He doesn’t.” Fear iced my veins. I tried stilling my shaking, but it was no use. It kept coming in waves. Sure, the man was home from the service, but did that mean once he found out about Remy… “He’s not going to try to take my girl, right?”
“Fuck no,” Ryker said adamantly. “That fucker comes near either of you, I’ll end him.”
There appeared to be no love lost between these two men. I didn’t know if that was a good thing or bad. But in the moment, I didn’t care. All that was important was keeping Remy safe.
“He can’t have her.” The words came out on trembled lips.
When my father found out I was pregnant, all hell broke loose, and it was the begging of the end.
“Cyrus the virus. Sneaking out and you end up pregnant! That was not God’s will. How am I supposed to find a suitable man for you now? No one here will want a child that isn’t theirs!” His face was beet red, fists clenched at his sides. While he spoke, small bits of spittle came flying from his lips. Furious didn’t even put a dent on how he felt.
If everything wasn’t perfect in his life, he would blow just like this.
Looking back to last night, I wished I could take back the words I told my mother in the dead of night. She heard my tears and came into my room, something she never did.
I needed someone. There was so much weighing me down, and I needed to trust someone. My mother was not that someone. That I knew, but my state of mind wasn’t the best. I wished she was the mother I’d always needed, but alas she wasn’t. She ran right to my father, telling him everything.
In that moment, I’d hated her just as much as myself for trusting her.
My father gripped my arms tightly, shaking me back and forth. “I can’t believe you!” he yelled in my face, still forcefully maneuvering me. When he threw me to the ground, I curled into a ball on the floor, for I knew what was next.
Sure enough, two kicks came to my stomach, but hit my knees and arms instead. It hurt, but I was protecting my baby. He might not have loved it, but I did.
“No man is going to want you. Not even one with fifty wives!” Kick, kick. “You’re a little slut!”
“Stop!” I cried out, tears rolling down my face. He reached down and wrenched me up off the floor, my knees buckling from the force of his kicks. It took me a moment to steady myself.
“You will never speak about this. You will never tell a soul about this … this … child. Tomorrow you will get rid of this baby.”
My eyes widened. Never ever was a child ‘gotten rid of’ in our family. We had thirty-three brothers and sisters, for Pete’s sakes. It wasn’t in our scripture to terminate a pregnancy. Never did I think my father would choose this path. Try to take my baby from me, yes. Kill it. No way.
“Why?”
The slap to the face hit me hard as I fell to my knees on the concrete floor. “You’ll ruin our name. My name. We can’t have that. You were a prize to potential suitors; no respectable man would ever want to marry you now.
His precious name was gold around here. He could do anything he wanted and get away with it. But this would put all of that power and control in jeopardy. He wasn’t willing to risk any of it. He’d do whatever it took to protect his name, even ‘taking care’ of my baby.
All of his children were to be married off to other men in our community. It was prestigious to marry one of us. A sign from God to carry on our last name. An honor for them to mix their blood with ours.
It was all a bunch of garbage. A big stink-infested pile of trash.
“Your mother will take you out of state and get you handled. You do not come back into this house with that ‘thing’ inside of you.”
With that, he turned and left the room. My mother said nothing as she followed him out.
It was that night, I knew my baby and I had to get out of there. We did.
Micah couldn’t take my baby from me. My body felt as though I were standing in a fire as I burned with dread. My chest hurt as my hand flew up to grasp it. This couldn’t be a heart attack, could it?
Spots began to form behind my eyelids as I became lightheaded. Scenarios ran through my brain, and none of them were good. They all ended with Micah taking my little girl for me.
No. No. No. That couldn’t happen.
“Are you okay?” Austyn asked, guiding me onto the couch. I sat with my head hanging as I tried desperately not to let the darkness overtake me.
“He can’t know about Remy. He’s not on the birth certificate, and as far as he knows, we just slept together. We need to keep it that way.” Then something hit me as my thoughts kept rumbling.
“This means that Tug and Blaze are her grandparents?” My eyes widened with shock as I ran through our time here in Sumner. Blaze had watched Remy on a couple of occasions, and Remy knew both of them from the clubhouse.
Tears welled in my eyes. My girl had grandparents, something that I never thought would be possible for her. Two more people to love her. I’d known them since we got here, and they were great people.
It was a tug of war. While I was so happy, she had grandparents; the flip side of that meant I’d have to tell Micah.
“Talk to me,” Austyn ordered as Ryker looked up at the ceiling; for what reason, I didn’t know, nor did I have the time to process.