“I’m sure Hitler’s mother thought he was a great person too, and look at how that turned out. You’re her friend and you want to see the best in her. Too bad I don’t see the same qualities.”
Christina was bright—no doubt about it—but being smart wasn’t enough.
I felt sorry for Melissa, with every passing second of my denial her eyes grew sadder.
“For the sake of our friendship, Ezra. Please give her a chance.” Her phone beeped and she answered it, holding up a finger to me. “Andrew, seriously, give me a few minutes. I’m alive and well.” She hung up and put on her sad face.
“No. I’m sorry, Melissa.”
I wanted to help Melissa for the sake of our friendship—or what was left of it—however, I wasn’t sure about Christina. I scratched my head avoiding Melissa’s pleading eyes.
“Please, Ezra,” she repeated it like a tune. After realizing the approach wasn’t getting her anywhere, there was a swift change in her tone from imploring to businesslike. “Okay, let’s be practical about this.”
Her words piqued my curiosity. “Go on.”
“I’m part owner of a large tech company. I’ve got connections that might benefit you and your firm. If you help me, I’ll owe you big time and if you ever need a favor, I won’t blink. I’ll agree to whatever you want. No questions asked.”
“No questions asked?” I echoed hoping she’d understood what she was offering.
Melissa was a powerful woman, connected to powerful people and in my situation those alliances were valuable.
“Fine,” I replied after a few minutes of thought. “I’ll hire her but one step out of line and she’s gone.”
“Fair enough. All I want is that you give her a chance.” We shook hands, sealing our deal. “One more thing, don’t tell her I was here. She’d kill me if she knew.”
“I don’t think she’ll believe the job was given to her because the interview went well.”
“Just don’t say anything.” Her phone rang after a quick check, she silenced it. “Thank you, Ezra.”
I nodded. Melissa ran out and I stared at the door wondering what the fuck I had done.
Since there was nothing left to do, I decided to leave as well. I went to Vinnie’s office to turn off the lights and a torn piece of paper caught my eye. It was jammed under the gap between the door and the floor. I plucked it out and inspected it closely. Part of the logo once on the paper was missing, but I didn’t need the complete drawing to recognize it. The logo was of Rowan’s restaurant.
Chapter Six
Christina
Once my therapist asked if I knew when my eating disorder began and without hesitation, I answered, “high school.” But after further and deeper introspection on the matter, I realized it began long before that. It started when I was a child, and the root of it was my mother.
Before my father died, we were a normal, happy family. After his passing, an emotional and financial hole was left behind. My mother and I moved into a tiny one-bedroom apartment. It was all she could afford on a teacher’s salary.
I remembered the day we found out that dad was gone—not with accuracy—but I recalled the moment an officer knocked on our door, saying there had been an accident and my father hadn’t made it. Some drunk asshole ran into his car, ending his life in a gruesome way.
What came after were days and nights of hearing my mother weep inconsolably when she thought I wasn’t listening.
I was six at the time and although I understood what was going on, I never fully digested the situation. I didn’t know how to feel or react. I missed my dad and when my mother cried, I cried with her.
My mother began eating a lot more than usual. When she ate, she smiled and in order to keep smiling, she ate more. Neither of us knew it at the time but depression—the unseen, silent killer—was ruining my mother and dragging me along for the ride.
Neither one of us ever learned how to deal with our emotions. In happy times, we celebrated with food. In somber times we drowned our sorrows in food. No matter what we were going through, food was always there to comfort us.
I never told my mother any of this. It would break her if she knew my problems traced back to her. Her depression ruined us both and although I’d grown up, I never mastered the art of governing extreme emotions without food.
The emotions Ezra evoked drove me up the walls. I was doing so well at that interview and then I stared at his lips. My body flushed. Then I remembered how he never even looked at me. Ever. And I got mad at myself for still being attracted to him.
I felt like such a fool. A stupid fool.
On my way home, I hit up three fast-food restaurants and later got rid of all of it. Slowly, I was falling into a pattern. The last time I was like this, a trip to the hospital after I’d passed out at school was what it took to shake me up. I would starve myself for days and the few times I did eat, it all went down the toilet afterward. Erica tried to help me and keep my secret for as long as possible but after the incident, she told my mother everything.
I wasn’t suicidal or crazy. All I wanted was to lose weight and I did. Therefore, I kept going and when people said, “You have to stop.” they didn’t imagine how difficult it was to stop. It took several months of therapy and medication before I quit.
I told myself that this wasn’t like the last time. I was better. I could go back to eating healthy and stop shoving a finger down my throat whenever I wanted. Just not right now, because I needed it.
I rolled on my bed and threw my arm over my eyes. Flashes of the interview came floating to mind. Rage surfaced at the sight of Ezra, bristling my skin and clouded my thoughts. Once again, I lashed out before thinking. It was official, Ezra was my trigger. Every time he showed up my heart rate spiked, causing shallow, rapid breaths. I let out a grave sigh and reached for my phone.
Online, I searched for job postings. I needed to get a job and start earning a living. There was no way I’d run to Melissa, Erica, or even my mother every time I needed money. And my savings were running out.
An incoming email halted my search.
Subject: Re: Re: JOB INTERVIEW CONFIRMATION
You got the job. Be aware that you’ll be on a trial. Any wrongdoing on your side; consider yourself fired.
You start tomorrow at eight. If you’re late, don’t bother coming in at all.
Best Regards,
Ezra Collin
After reading the email for the fourth time, I still couldn’t believe he gave me the position. Why would he? There was no way in hell he’d hire me after the way I behaved at the interview. He must have felt obligated to do so, or he pitied me.
Eventually, I put two and two together—Melissa. This had to be her doing. I sent out a group text to Melissa and Erica.
Christina: Ezra gave me the job.
Christina: I know you had something to do with this Mel.
Melissa: And if I did?
Christina: Then he’s giving me the job cuz he feels obligated to and not cuz he wants to.
Melissa: Agh! Tina. You’re smart so take the job if only to prove to him that you’re capable.