I had to make a decision. The obvious choice was to walk away, but how could I when he needed me? Or how could I consider staying with a man that could potentially put me in danger?
I thought back to every moment we spent together. It was all true. Every kiss was real. And every touch was honest. I loved him and what he did didn’t change that. Regardless of what he’d done, I believed that living with an incomplete soul was a form of death. I was dying and Ezra had brought me back to life. He filled the cracks of my soul with his love and I couldn’t let him go. I would go mad without his touch. There was nothing left to think about. I’d made my choice.
“Christina.” The surprise in his voice and excitement in his face was priceless when he saw me standing at his porch. “Come in.” He stepped aside but I didn’t move.
“What are you doing about it?” I shoved my hands in the pockets of my jeans, shifting on my feet. “You said you are going to fix this. How?”
“Why don’t you come in and we’ll talk?”
“I don’t want to come in. I want an answer.”
“Christina … I …”
“For fucks sake, Ezra! Just tell me.”
“I’m going to gather enough information on these people and give it to a cop I’ve been working with. Once they are busted, I’m going to disappear … taking over eighty million dollars with me.”
My heart sank to my stomach. Sadness gripped my chest. “You had it all planned out. You were going to leave without me, weren’t you?”
“No!” He shook his head. “Never, I wouldn’t leave without letting you know what was going on.”
“But you never planned on taking me with you.” It was intended to be a question but the words came out accusatorially.
“I couldn’t ask you to come with me when I wasn’t even sure where all of this would lead. It would ruin your life, Christina. We’d be constantly looking over our shoulders and on the run. I couldn’t do that to you.”
“You abandoning me would ruin me.”
“I would have come back for you.”
Sarcastically, I chuckled. “You don’t get to make decisions on my behalf. You should have come to me long ago and told me the truth.”
“I should’ve, and I’m sorry.”
I inhaled and decided it was time to pour my heart out. “I am so afraid that this, us, it could just be an illusion. I don’t know what the future holds, we are together today, but are we meant to be forever? I don’t know if destiny brought us together or if this is the biggest fucking cosmic joke. Despite all my fears and insecurities, what I do know is how I feel right now. And now, I love you Ezra, and I want to be with you. If you flee, I’ll be right there with you. Wherever you go that’s where I’ll be. I choose you, Ezra. I choose us.”
“Christin—”
“You have one question to answer: would you rather love me or leave me?”
He clasped my forearm, dragged me inside and slammed the door. He backed me up against the wall and his lips were pressed against mine, gripping on to my face as if he were afraid to let go and I fought for a breath as desire rippled through me.
He pressed me harder against the wall. I slid my hand beneath his shirt and he moaned, I let it run down his hard chest and paused at the front of his belt. The heel of my hand brushed against his fly and the swell of his hardening erection straining against the denim. My hands unzipped his fly and slipped inside to stroke him. Ezra groaned against my lips at my caress.
“Slow,” he said, brushing his mouth against mine. His lips moved down to my neck. The tip of his tongue slid across my collarbone before he continued his progress down the center of my chest, towards my breast.
He wanted it slow but I couldn’t wait any longer. I took it upon myself to quicken the slow ingress. I brought our kiss to a halt and stripped bare. Cursing, he got rid of his own clothes. But the way he looked at me was addictive, every time it was like he’d never seen a woman before. The intensity of his stare drove my desire into a frenzy.
Then I was in his arms—solid arms that lifted me as if I weighed nothing—as he kissed me with uncontrolled hunger, my breasts came in contact with his torso. He tucked his hands under my ass and lifted me. I wrapped my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck, as he adjusted my hips over his cock.
He rammed into me in one fierce drive. His cock filled me completely. He wasted no time establishing a steady rhythm. Powering my desire with each stroke.
Deeper.
Harder.
Faster.
He tilted his head and our eyes remained locked and I witnessed the strain of pleasure etched in his forehead as he continued to drive us relentlessly towards our climax.
With each thrust of his hips, my insides tightened around him. “I’d rather love you,” he said through gritted teeth. “It’s all I want to do. Love you.”
I threw my head back to the wall, trembling as my orgasm rolled through me. He followed close behind, groaning my name while he released into me in long, hot spurts.
“What name should I put on my passport?”
“Anything you want,” Ezra said, drawing circles on my stomach.
“I’ve always wanted to be Diane.”
“Then Diane it shall be.”
“When will we leave?”
“There is no specific date yet but it won’t be long.”
“You said you were taking over eighty million, what did you mean by that?”
“I’m stealing from them.”
My mouth hung open. “Why would you do that?”
“Because the woman who runs the cartel is my mother and I won’t leave without taking what she loves the most. It’s the only way I’ll be able to hurt her just as much as she hurt my father … and me.”
My jaw dropped even lower and my eyes felt as though they would pop out of my skull. Ezra chuckled and got me up to speed on his latest family drama. It was one surprise after another.
“Christina,” he called, I sensed the sudden shift and the seriousness in his tone. “You can’t tell anyone about this. Not your family or friends. You won’t be able to say goodbye to them, and it will be awhile before you can reach out.”
I was aware of what I was getting myself into and I also knew it wouldn’t be easy. For love, I’d have to give up another kind of love. I’d miss my family, Erica and Melissa, but I’d miss Ezra even more.
“I know. But I’m scared, Ezra.”
“It will be alright.”
So I hoped.
“I want to get a tattoo,” Ezra said. “I want to immortalize this moment. And have something on me that will remind me of your little speech.” He laughed. I giggled covering my face, completely embarrassed. I couldn’t believe I said all those things. “It was the most beautiful thing I have ever heard.” He kissed my temple. “I love you.”
We agreed that the both of us would get a tattoo. Ezra took me to the studio where he got his done. I was terrified that it might hurt, but Ezra said it was just a pinch, and then it would go away. We filled out the necessary paperwork and gave it to a guy who had ink covering all visible skin. He took us to a back room that had a dentist-style chair in the center. The walls were red beneath the cluster of photographs of his work.