The night Nathan caught us was one of the worst memories of my life.
He turned the key and backed out of the driveway.
About a half mile down the road, he glanced over at me. “I can’t tell you much I appreciate you having us over. I know I make you nervous. Even if you’re trying not to show it, Farrah, I see it in your body language. You’ve given up a peaceful holiday out of the goodness of your heart. I should’ve said no, but I couldn’t pass up an opportunity to distract Dad.” He paused. “And to see you.”
I fidgeted in my seat. “It’s my pleasure. It means a lot to Nathan, too.”
“I feel really lucky to have him as a friend again. He’s always felt more like a brother, though.”
“He’s a good brother, despite all of his faults.”
Jace nodded. “Where’s your boyfriend today?”
“Having dinner with his family. He’s coming over for dessert later.”
He swallowed. “I see.”
My eyes lingered on his Adam’s apple, wandered up to the cleft in his chin...then his lips.
“How long have you been dating him?” he asked.
“A little over a year.”
“How did you meet?”
“He struck up a conversation one day at his family’s liquor store. I was buying wine to bring over to a friend’s house—since I don’t drink anymore around Nathan.” I cleared my throat. “Nathan and Niles don’t get along that great, as you know. I don’t push the issue about him coming to our place. I could’ve gone to Niles’s family’s house today, but I’d rather spend Thanksgiving with my brother. It’s tradition.”
“I know traditions are important to you. Do you and Nathan still have movie night?”
“Actually, that’s the one thing we’ve faltered on. It’s more like every couple of months now.”
“Well, at least you try.”
As we approached the catering place, he slowed the truck. “Is this it?”
“Yup.”
Jace parked, and we both exited the vehicle.
After I gave my name to the woman at the counter, she informed me that my order wasn’t ready yet, that they were experiencing a slight delay due to one of their ovens breaking down. She suggested we return in thirty minutes.
“I guess we have to kill some time,” I said. “We’ll be cutting it close with the turkey. I might have to ask Nathan to take it out. But it’s not worth going all the way home and coming back.”
“No biggie. It looked like there was a café open next door. Let’s grab a coffee or something.”
Jace and I ordered two hot chocolates and took them to his car. The weather in Florida was finally cool enough to warrant a hot drink.
He put the music on low as we quietly sipped. I gazed out the window, but could feel his eyes on me.
He eventually broke the silence. “Do you still go to that bar for those confessionals?”
I shook my head. “I stopped going to The Iguana a while back, but from what I hear, they still do it once a week.”
“Whatever happened to your friend, Kellianne?”
“We’re still good friends. She’s married now, and she just had a baby girl.”
“Wow. That’s wild.”
“Yeah.”
“Do you still write at night liked you used to?”
I looked down at my cup. “I haven’t written for myself in some time. And even if creativity struck, I don’t have a lot of time now between school and work.”
“I know we never spoke about it, but Nathan told me you’re majoring in criminal justice. I think that’s badass.”
I nodded. “For the longest time, I couldn’t figure out what I wanted to do. But when it came down to making a decision, criminal justice felt right—probably because of what happened to Mom and Dad.”
Jace’s eyes seared into mine. He swirled the liquid around in his cup. “You think you’ll go on to law school?”
“I haven’t ruled it out. There’s a lot I still haven’t decided.”
“Figuring out what you want to do with your life is no small decision. I’m still figuring it out, too. I’ve been wavering back and forth a lot lately.”
“How so?”
“Well, my father’s decision to sell the company had a lot to do with my mother. They were supposed to be traveling the world together in their retirement. Now that she’s gone, he doesn’t think he wants to retire quite yet. He needs something to focus on.”
“He’s thinking of backing out on the sale?”
“Yeah. But the thing is, he can’t handle it all alone anymore. He hasn’t asked me to help, but I feel like that’s what he wants—for me to stay here and run the business with him.”
An anxious feeling came over me at the prospect of Jace staying in Palm Creek. “Is that what you want?”
“I know I don’t want to leave Florida right now. He needs me. I’m also a little worried, to be honest. With my mother gone, he might fall into old habits.”
“The gambling, you mean.”
“Yep.” He sighed. “He never went back to it, and I’d like to keep it that way.”
“I can understand that fear.”
“So, I’m pretty sure I’m staying—permanently this time.” His eyes lingered on mine.
I sat there stone-faced, unsure of what to say. The thought of him leaving again scared me even more than his staying. I wasn’t about to analyze what that meant.
“What about your life back in Charlotte?” I asked.
He sighed and placed his cup in the holder. “There’s not much to go back to. Kaia and I had an okay relationship, but I’m not in love with her. Being away made me realize that even more. I’ve had a lot of time to reflect. That relationship was something I should’ve ended before it got too serious. But I was comfortable with her, and that was good enough for a while.” He turned toward me. “Maybe you can relate. You said you felt…safe…with your boyfriend. That’s sort of how it was with Kaia.” He paused. “Feeling safe doesn’t always mean it’s right, though.”
I took a deep breath in as I continued to look out toward the street, refusing to look in his eyes so he couldn’t sense my weakness.
“You know,” he said. “When I first came back, I nearly had a heart attack when I drove by your old house—before I knew you guys had moved.”
My forehead wrinkled. “Why?”
“There was a little girl playing outside. She had black hair like mine. For a moment, I thought I’d left behind more than just my heart when I took off.”
It took me a few seconds to realize what he meant. “You thought I had your baby?”
“Only for, like, two minutes—the longest two minutes of my life. Then her mother came out and snatched her, thinking I was some kind of weirdo for staring at her little girl from the sidewalk.”
My mouth hung open. “Wow. I guess I can see how you might have thought that.” I looked at my lap. “After you left…my period was late.”
His eyes widened. “What?”
“I thought I was pregnant.”