I'm such a sucker for this boy.
Swallowing the lump in my throat, I lift my eyes to his. "You know, ever since we stopped fake dating and started dating for real, I've been scared that you'd realize I'm not good for you. That I'm nothing compared to Heather. I'm scared that one day you'd go back to her and leave me behind." I take a shaky breath, my stomach a tight ball of nerves. Oh, boy, here we go—the biggest truth of all. "The thing is, I've been in love with you since we were kids."
Duane's mouth falls open in shock, his hands dropping from my face. "What?"
"Remember the day you stole my first kiss? I was nine years old and you were ten." I gulp again, my pulse now pounding hard in my ears. "Well, turned out, it wasn't just my first kiss you stole that day. You also stole my heart."
"Oh, wow," he whispers, a look of stunned wonder etched on his face. "Beanie, I had no idea."
I give him a wry smile. "Why would you? I never told you."
"You should have."
"Why? Would it have changed a thing?"
"Maybe. I don't know." He rubs the back of his neck, barking out a dry chuckle. Then lifts his eyes back to mine. "Maybe we wouldn't have wasted so much time away from each other. Who knows? We could have celebrated a few anniversaries already."
I laugh as I go to sit down on the front steps. "I'm pretty sure we would have been broken up by now."
"You don't know that," Duane argues, following suit, sitting next to me. "We could have been Nate and Blair who'd been together since they were kids."
Another laugh bursts out of me. I've made him watch Gossip Girl with me two nights ago. Now, he's using the characters as an example.
My lips pull to the side. "You know, they broke up, right? They didn't even end up together."
"That's because Nate is a dumbass. He let the best thing in his life slip through his fingers. I wouldn't do the same mistake," he says softly, his eyes caressing my face, making my heart stutter.
Ugh. This guy. His words wreck me all the damn time.
Biting back a huge grin, I roll my glistening eyes.
"So, uh, we're okay now, right?" he asks, giving me a puppy-dog look as if to convince me if I wasn't already convinced.
I nod.
"Thank God," he breathes out. Then he grabs my hand and engulfs it in his. "Okay, here's a truth bomb from me. Since you just confessed your deepest, darkest secret, it's only fair that I do the same."
I chew on my bottom lip to keep from smiling. "Hit me."
"I had a huge crush on you when we were kids," he says, his cheeks red under the glow of the porch light.
I blink at him. "What?"
"It was the reason why I kissed you. And, FYI, it was my first kiss, too." His cheeks are even redder now.
My jaw drops. "Seriously?"
He raises his fingers. "Scout's honor."
"Oh, my God." I throw my head back and laugh out loud, remembering the same gesture he made when we were kids. This is incredible.
"So you see, Beanie, you stole my heart first."
My smile disappears, humor leaving me at once. "Really?"
"Really, really." He rests his forehead against mine. "What can I say? Your beanies and pigtails were damn irresistible."
"Shut up," I laugh, pushing at his chest.
He captures my hand. "Shush. I'm not done with my confessions yet." He turns serious. "You asked me how I got Gray to forgive me and talk to me again, right?"
Yeah, I did. I nod.
He takes in a deep breath, as if drawing courage. "That's because I told him I'm falling for you."
"Y-You're falling for me?" I hear myself whisper, my heart galloping hard in my chest.
His mouth tips on one side. "Honestly, I'm quite sure I've already fallen."
I stare at him—at the boy who has always owned my heart. The boy who’s looking at me as if I’m the one who owns his. As if I'm the one who has every power to break it.
Flashing a huge grin, my chest near bursting, I nudge his shoulder with mine. "Good. Because I'm right there with you."
And as we kiss under the stars, I make a mental promise to myself.
Screw Heather. Screw all the girls who will dare take him from me. He's mine and I'm finally embracing that truth with confidence.
EPILOGUE
"Jesus, man, stop mauling my sister," Gray mutters in a frustrated voice.
I feel Duane smile against my lips before he pulls away. Making a face at my brother, I slide off my boyfriend's lap and sit beside him on the picnic blanket.
Picking up an apple from the basket Indie and I prepared, I watch the other kids swim and goof around in the lake.
The last time we were here, I was sitting in this very spot, putting up with Gray and Indie's PDA while watching Duane focus his attention on Heather. Now, a couple months later, he's sitting right next to me and giving me all of his attention. And Gray is the one putting up with our PDA.
Funny how things have changed.
It's been weeks since that night Duane and I confessed our love for each other on my front porch. A whole lot of time has been spent together as a couple. A do-over, he called it—something I happily agreed with.
Being Duane's girlfriend is great. Being Duane's girlfriend without any baggage? Completely amazing. That late night talk helped me overcome my fears and insecurities. Telling Duane and putting them out into the open did wonders.
But mostly because I came to realize and accept the fact that I'm enough. And I'm more than enough for Duane—or anyone else for that matter.
It also helps that I've finally stopped seeing Heather as a threat. Oh, she still tries to get Duane's attention at school every chance she gets, and I often catch her glaring at me across the hall or cafeteria, but I don't care anymore.
Not that I'm not taking pleasure in witnessing my boyfriend openly reject her advances. That will never get old. If anything, it makes me wonder why I ever doubted him in the first place.
It's plain for everyone to see that he's all mine. That I'm the only one he wants and it won't change any time soon.
And Kendra—whose approval I managed to earn rather quickly—now likes me for her brother. She even wants to hang out with me every time I come over to their house. I always oblige, of course. So it's safe to say that she likes me a whole lot better than Heather these days.
I thought Duane and I spent a lot of time together before the do-over, but even more so in the "after." I quickly learned that my boyfriend can be so clingy—and still so jealous.
We ran into Justin a week ago at Jerry's. He's with his friends, and even though he has a girlfriend now, Duane still couldn't help himself. He glared in his direction every time Justin smiled at me.
I reprimanded him, but I'd been secretly pleased. I never told him this, but it felt like a small payback on my part—for witnessing him fool around with girls in the past.
"Let them be," Indie tells Gray, who still hasn't stopped complaining about me and Duane. Then she moves up to her feet and extends a hand to him. "Come on, I want to go for a swim. We've been sitting here for a long time."