“I think there are forces bigger than you and me.” I swallowed, looking up at him. “And I think with that precious baby out there, I couldn’t risk it,” I whispered. “I did what I had to do to protect him. To protect you and my brother.” My eyes filled with tears as I tried to explain what had made me run. “But that’s all to hell now,” I added, my voice raw.
He stumbled back to the bed, sitting as though drunk. “All that time in Hawthorne you were…you were…”
“Pregnant,” I nodded. “I kept trying to tell you. But after the night we were together, you were so dodgy, so unsure.”
“So this was revenge?”
I reeled back in shock. “No! God no. I kept trying to tell you. I thought I had time to work up to it. And then...and then the threats just became too much and I knew if I stayed, I’d just screw up your whole life and Sal’s,” I shook my head. “I couldn’t allow that.”
“So you what? Disappeared on your own to go through your entire pregnancy alone? To be a single mother when you could have had me? Could have had all of us?”
His comment pissed me right the hell off.
“Would I have had you? You tell me, after that night we spent together and how you treated me afterwards, how the hell do you think I should have thought that!” I exclaimed.
“You think so little of me?” He rose from the bed, his stance tense and expression thunderous. “You think I wouldn’t take care of you and my child?”
“Lower your voice,” I hissed.
“This is so fucked up,” he groaned, raking his hand through his hair.
“Pretty much,” I agreed. “But whatever was between us – whatever the hell that even was…” I sighed and he narrowed his eyes. “That has nothing to do with why I left.”
“Yeah, we’re gonna get to that,” he declared.
I sighed, utterly spent and overwhelmed. “I know you probably hate me,” I murmured. “But Ax, I’m so tired. I don’t even know what to say to you right now.”
His grey eyes swept over my face and I was sure he was taking in the dark circles under my eyes and pale complexion.
He nodded, his expression cool. “We’ll talk again in the morning.”
“Where are you staying?” I asked with a yawn.
“Here,” he answered with zero hesitation.
“I’m sorry, what?” I asked, dumbfounded.
“You and my son are under this roof and I’m not going anywhere.” He shook his head with determination.
“There’s nowhere for you to sleep!” I protested.
He eyed the bed with a cocked brow.
“There’s nowhere for you to sleep,” I reiterated with hands on my hips.
He sighed. “There’s a perfectly good couch.”
“Mad sleeps out there,” I shook my head.
“I don’t know much about babies, but Gracie always sleeps like the dead.” He shared, speaking of Cole and Scarlet’s little girl.
“He usually does,” I allowed. “But he’s cutting a tooth.”
“It’s fine,” he shrugged. “I’ve got lots of time to make up for.”
My eyes filled with tears as I whispered hoarsely, “I didn’t do this to hurt you. I swear it.”
He gripped the back of my neck, his eyes blazing down into mine. “Yeah, I’m counting on that.”
Then he was gone and I was left standing in my bedroom, listening to him quietly move around the living room.
Despite my exhaustion, I tossed and turned, worried about what his return could mean. I knew Axel well enough that once he saw our son, he’d never let go. I just had to hope we’d both survive what was to come.
I woke up late the next morning, jolting out of bed at seeing that the clock read 8 a.m. I hurtled out of my room worried for Maddox.
I was met with two identical sets of grey eyes looking up at me when I stopped abruptly in the living room, the past evening flooding back to me.
Axel sat with Mad in his lap at the kitchen table.
“I didn’t know what he ate,” he shrugged. “But he seems to like my banana,” he added with a grin as Maddox opened up to gum another bite.
I felt my entire being soften at watching the two of them together. “Yeah, he likes bananas,” I responded, feeling a tenderness toward him that up to this point, I’d only felt for Maddox. “He just started on some solid food.”
“I made coffee.” Axel cocked his head toward the coffee pot.
“Thanks,” I murmured gratefully, dropping a brief kiss on Mad’s head before moving to fill up a cup. “Can I get you a refill?”
“No, I’m good.” He shook his head, his eyes watching me move around the small space as I made Maddox his bottle.
“Do you want to feed him?” I asked quietly, handing him the warm bottle.
“Yeah,” Axel nodded, his expression unreadable as he took the bottle and gave it to Mad.
A knock sounded at the door and I saw Axel stiffen. “It’s just Jill,” I assured him, moving to open the door. Jill stood on the other side with Mason balanced on her hip. She breezed into the room.
“Is there coffee because this little stinker was up all…” She stopped mid-sentence, her mouth hanging open when she spotted Axel.
“Jill, this is Axel. Maddox’s father,” I introduced a bit awkwardly. The words weighed heavily in the air. I looked over, seeing a storm of emotion pass over Axel’s face at being referred to as a dad.
“Hi,” she choked out, her eyes wide with shock.
“Hey.” He gave her a chin lift, continuing to hold the bottle for Maddox who was sucking greedily.
“Are you still bringing Mad over while you go to work?” she asked me with wide eyes.
“Yes,” I answered at the same time Axel answered, “No.”
I glared at him.
“You okay, Soph?” she asked quietly; I could tell she was worried. I’d never spoken a word about Axel to her or the fact that he was a formidable biker with tattoos and a gruff personality.
“I know there’s a lot I haven’t told you,” I responded regretfully. “But I trust him. I’m good.” I assured her.
She peered around me with a shrewd gaze. “You gonna take care of my girl here because for a twenty-five year old, she lives like an old spinster,” she huffed and I rolled my eyes.
“I’m gonna take care of both of them,” he replied, meeting her skeptical gaze.
She gave an affirmative nod. “Okay, maybe I like him.” She headed to the coffee pot after putting Mason down on the baby blanket. Mad immediately started to squirm.
“He wants to sit with his best bud,” I told Ax, taking him from his lap and setting him down next to Mason.
“So how long are you in town for?” Jill asked Axel lightly.
“As long as it takes to get her to come home with me,” he answered without hesitation.
My eyes bugged out of my head at his declaration.
“Where’s home?” Jill asked with confusion.
I winced, again feeling guilt over how little I’d told her.
“Nevada,” Axel answered for me.