“True that.” They reached for the cherry chocolate chip at the same time, which earned him a lopsided grin from Brandt before the carton landed in the basket. Shane was officially not going to survive this man, who not only wasn’t pushing but who was still trying to make things better, even amid all the worries for Jewel and his own trying day.
Shane didn’t deserve him, that much was for sure. Words tumbled over each other in his brain as he tried to sort out what to say that wasn’t trite and wasn’t too much.
“Wilder? Your prescriptions are ready.” The pharmacy tech saved him from his indecision as she called Brandt’s name. Which was also Jewel’s and a nice reminder that the two of them were a unit, and Shane was the bonus helper who didn’t entirely belong but also wasn’t an outsider. It was a weird no-man’s land of both wanting more and not being sure he could handle more. And it wasn’t like he could name that want either, couldn’t quantify it even as it weighed him down, made his shoulders slump and his step slow.
And his muddled thoughts continued even once they were back at the house, trying to get the medicine into the baby and then get her to sleep in her crib. They patted. They walked. They bounced. Shane sang and sang. Brandt rocked. And right when Shane was about to give up and propose Brandt at least go sleep himself, she settled and let them creep from the room.
“Wow. I think she’s actually out,” Shane whispered once they were in the hallway.
“Shush. Don’t jinx it.” Brandt put a finger on Shane’s lips before heading down the hall and into the kitchen. “And we’ve absolutely earned that ice cream now. Your poor throat.”
“There are certainly more fun ways to strain it,” Shane agreed as he grabbed some spoons and bowls. God, he was so tired that even the thought of sex didn’t rouse him. There was a serious risk of him falling asleep mid ice cream, let alone trying for any mouth action of the more fun variety.
“I can think of a few.” Brandt’s leer was similarly strained and he let out a long yawn. “Later.”
“I feel you. So tired.” Leaning against the counter, Shane stretched his neck.
“Come on.” Not waiting for Shane, Brandt took the ice cream and headed back down the hall to his room.
“What are we doing?” Shane trailed behind him, stopping in the doorway as Brandt set the ice cream on the nightstand before pulling off his shirt.
“Ice cream in bed.” Brandt said this like it was the most normal occurrence in the world, something they did nightly.
“Kinky.” Barely managing a laugh, Shane followed Brandt’s lead and stripped down to his boxers before joining him under the covers.
“Hardly.” Brandt grabbed one of the spoons and offered Shane the other. “I bet we pass out before the pint is empty.”
“I’ll take that bet.” Apparently, they were going to eat right out of the carton, making this even more cozy and domestic and sweet. So sweet he almost couldn’t stand it. “And I’ll take the wakeups. You’ve got an early morning. You sure you don’t want me sleeping in there with her?”
“Nah. That bed in there is crap.” Brandt caught a drip of ice cream with his tongue and suddenly Shane’s dick wasn’t so sleepy after all.
“So you’re saving my back?” he pressed, that same urge from earlier driving him, wanting to matter to Brandt, wanting to be needed for more than a spare set of hands.
Brandt raised an eyebrow. “You need me to admit I sleep better with you right here?”
“Might be nice.” Shane couldn’t lie, not to him, not even when the truth made him look needier than he might like.
“Fine.” Brandt let out a long-suffering sigh before popping a spoonful of ice cream in Shane’s mouth. “I like you here. Even when you hog the covers.”
“I’m sorry, who does what? Pillow thief.” Swallowing first, Shane gave an exaggerated blink. Joking was so much easier than getting real about his feelings, about what this was and what he wanted it to be.
The teasing carried them through most of the carton of ice cream, but then Brandt sobered as he set the pint aside.
“Thanks for being there today.” No joking, no silly grin, only honest gratitude, and Shane’s breath caught, chest so full it hurt.
“Anytime,” he whispered. And meant it. This was why he wasn’t talking or thinking about that phone call. Brandt needed him. Jewel needed him. And he needed them. Everything else could wait.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Brandt was done being freaked out at his own domesticity, and instead, he marveled at his aptitude for it as he cleaned the counter, stopping as he heard Shane come in.
“What smells so good?” Shane asked as he set his guitar near the table. He’d missed dinner for another band rehearsal, which had also let Brandt execute his plan, such as it was. However, as Shane came closer, something in his speculative expression made Brandt start second-guessing himself. Maybe this was a silly idea after all.
“Baking.” His tone came out all cagey.
“This a new talent of yours?” Shane’s easy smile didn’t help any either. He smiled more these days, which Brandt liked, but this time the tease felt like a barb. Damn it. Maybe he had freaked himself out with this whole thing.
“I’ll have you know I can read a cake mix box as easily as anyone else.” He moved so Shane could see the square cake on the counter. The kitchen hadn’t had a round pan, but the box had directions for a sheet cake, and once spread with the canned frosting, it didn’t look half bad. “And you might want to not poke fun at the effort if you want to have some.”
“Cake? Man, you really do have a sweet tooth.” Still smiling, Shane shook his head and brushed a kiss across Brandt’s cheek. And okay, that helped settle Brandt’s nerves back down. He was much freer with affection than Shane, and it always felt like earning some sort of reward when Shane initiated contact. Made him want to do whatever it took to earn more little touches and kisses.
“Or maybe I had an occasion.” Brandt gave him a pointed look as he hauled him closer.
“Occasion? What...” Shane blinked before his eyes widened. “Oh. That.”
“Come on. You can’t tell me you forgot your birthday.”
“Eh. It’s just a day.” Shane sounded exactly like Brandt himself had year after year. And why Brandt had this sudden urge for things to be different was something he refused to think too hard about, only that he couldn’t let the day pass unnoticed. Still, though, his skin heated as Shane continued to study the cake, mouth pursing. “I really don’t need cake.”