My head reared back. “What do I have to do with it?”
Before she answered, Molly leaned down to snag her water bottle, and she took a long sip. By the time she set her water down, more than ten seconds could’ve elapsed, but it felt like an hour.
“I know we have some complicated family dynamics,” she said slowly, “but I feel like we can’t avoid some of it.”
I nodded. “Yeah, I know. And Logan told me that we had to be nice to Nick even though we haven’t seen them once since they moved to the East Coast,” I said, referencing our other half-brother, who was a total a-hole. Thankfully, we rarely had to see him and his wife. There was about a minute, back when we were younger, when he challenged Logan for custody of the four of us. Gawd, what pricks we’d all be if he’d been the one to raise us.
Molly’s eyes searched mine. “I wasn’t talking about Nick.”
“Okay. Who?”
“Noah and I decided to send an invitation to Brooke’s last known address,” she said, lifting her chin.
My skin went hot. “What?” I whispered.
She nodded, and my skin went ice, ice cold. The change was shocking, bracing, and my heart went wild in my chest. I felt like Molly had taken a crowbar to my rib cage, prying me open like I was on a hinge.
“It wasn’t an easy decision,” Molly said calmly. “But Noah agreed that it was the right thing to do.”
“Why would you want her at your wedding?”
“Because … because this is a big deal! Getting married is a big deal. We’re all moving on to these chapters of our lives, and to me, it felt like an appropriate gesture to make, considering how happy I am with Noah.” Molly set her hands on her hips and exhaled heavily. “Maybe I’m handling this wrong.”
“Maybe you shouldn’t have invited the woman who abandoned us.”
Even to my own ears, it sounded like a childish reaction, on par with dumping coffee down the drain, but just like I had with Aiden, the thought of facing her also had teenage Isabel roaring back in charge of my brain. But this was not the teenage Isabel who had crushes and cut out pictures. This was the past version of me who lashed out at anyone who might hurt me, and oh, how good I’d been at that.
It was the version of me who felt like she had no control over any part of her life.
Molly inhaled slowly. “I knew it wouldn’t be easy to hear this, Isabel, but it’s my olive branch to extend.”
“She doesn’t deserve an olive branch,” I said hotly. “Last known address, Molly. She can’t even be bothered to update us on where in the hell she lives, but you think she should sit in the family pews at the ceremony?”
Molly held up her hands. “If you want to bait me into fighting about this, I won’t do it.”
I set my hands on my hips. “I’m not trying to fight. I’m trying to understand why the hell you think this is a good idea. You have no clue how she’ll act or what she’ll do, Molly. Don’t you want this day to be perfect?”
Just the thought of it, of Brooke walking into the room, had my hands and fingers and arms racing with pins and needles. I didn’t know how she’d aged. I didn’t know what she’d say. If she’d pretend everything was fine. And all of those unknowns snapped and snarled in my head like a rabid dog on a rusty chain.
My temper didn’t come out often, but this was the one single thing that would make me explode faster than anything else in the entire world. If my reaction to Aiden made me feel off-balance and out of control, then my reaction to Brooke turned me into a walking nuclear bomb.
The combination of them—the first building up for weeks and the second dropping without warning—wasn’t pretty.
To my horror, Molly’s eyes welled up. “Yes,” she whispered. “Of course I want this day to be perfect. I am marrying the love of my life. Don’t you think I’ve thought through every angle of this? I’m inviting Brooke for me, Isabel. Not for her.”
I exhaled a laugh, shoving my fingers into my hair. “What could you possibly gain from this?”
Molly shrugged helplessly. “Peace, Isabel. I gain peace from knowing I’ve forgiven her for leaving, and she realizes it. Maybe Brooke has stayed away all these years because she doesn’t know how she’d be greeted.”
The look I gave Molly could only be described as incredulous. “We’re making excuses for her now?”
“No,” she answered simply. “I’m not making excuses, but I won’t hide behind some arbitrary wall of anger either. I know therapy was bullshit for you, but it wasn’t for me. And sometimes, sister, you figure out a way to forgive someone because it’s what you need. Not because you’re letting them off the hook.”
With every word she said, I felt this overwhelming urge to flee. I wanted to slap my hands over my ears and stop listening. It was the same sensation I felt before Aiden said he bought the gym, except much, much worse.
This thing Molly had done was, at the very minimum, like yanking open the worst scar I could think of and watching someone pour saline into the torn flesh. And what that felt like … well … it brought out the very worst version of myself. I hated this side of me. This hot-wired, reactionary person who couldn’t control what she said or did.
I’d worked really hard not to be her. To let that instinct take me over. And everything in my life seemed to be instinct-driven lately, the wheel spinning wildly in a way that I couldn’t stop, couldn’t get a hold of.
I swooped down and picked up the bands we’d used, then tucked the medicine ball under my arm. “I think we should end here.”
“Isabel, come on, don’t be like this.”
I stopped, spearing her with a look. “How long have you had to process the idea of this?”
Molly swallowed before she answered. “Three weeks.”
“Great.” I nodded. “Sounds about right for me too. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to put this stuff away.”
When I returned from putting the equipment away, my playlist hit the end, and Molly was in the front area, slowly packing her bag. From where I stood, I couldn’t tell if she was crying or not, but I was too upset to stop and ask.
Which was a big deal because anything that made my sisters cry made me want to punch things repeatedly.
And now, it just made me want to run.
Because at the moment, the only thing making my sister cry was me.
Well, me and our mother.
Fucking Brooke and the damage she’d caused with her selfishness.
Molly paused before she left the gym and gave me a long look. Thankfully, her eyes were dry.
“I love you, Isabel. And I hope eventually, you’ll understand why I’m doing this.”
I rolled my lips between my teeth and nodded. “I love you too.”
She exhaled in relief when I said it, but her face was sad as she walked out.
The building pulsed with silence as soon as she walked out, and I inhaled unsteadily. Moving slow, I packed up my bag and turned off the lights in my office. But I couldn’t bring myself to leave. I almost looked up at the ceiling because I could’ve sworn that brick by brick, unimaginable weight was falling on top of me. My hands started shaking, and I curled my fists tight to make them stop.