Kennedy just shook her head as she smiled back at me. “Aren’t you going to tell me the story?”
“So I went on a terrible blind date a few weeks ago. So bad that the girl actually jumped in a lake to try to avoid me tonight. I helped her out. She must have gotten some lake gunk on me. Oh, but get this…”
“I’m still stuck on the fact that this woman jumped in a lake to avoid you. What the hell happened on your date?”
“She was super late and tried to set my dick on fire.”
Kennedy laughed and somehow her fingers wound up intertwined with mine.
I didn’t pull away. And neither did she.
“Wait, I need more than that,” Kennedy said.
“Right. I was about to tell you more. She was married to Cupcake.”
Kennedy cringed.
I would have missed it if I hadn’t been staring right at her. Fuck. Why had I mentioned Cupcake to Kennedy after everything he’d done to her? That was a sure-fire way to ruin the night. “I’m sorry…”
“It’s fine. Really.”
I held her hand a little tighter as she fidgeted with a strand of hair that had fallen from her bun. “I was actually asking for more details about how this girl set your penis on fire.”
“Almost. She didn’t succeed in her attempts. My dick is fine. But it was crazy. Just picture a candle and some of that oil you dip bread in. It was an accident. I think.”
Kennedy laughed. “Well, phew. Close call, huh?”
“Very close.” And speaking of close, her hand was pretty close to touching my dick right now. Except I was holding it still. And as much as I wanted her hand on my dick, I actually really liked holding it.
“Did she say why they got divorced?”
“Hm?” My mind had been preoccupied with thoughts of Kennedy touching me. “What did you say?”
“The woman you went on a date with. She divorced Cupcake?”
I knew what she was wondering. If he’d hurt Ash too. He had, but not in the same way. At least, I was pretty sure. “He cheated on her.”
“What a dick.”
“What a dick,” I said. “Someone should set him on fire.”
Kennedy laughed and placed her chin in the palm of her hand. And she just stared at me.
It was unnerving. I felt like I needed to get up and run around her small apartment. But I didn’t want to move because I didn’t want to let go of her hand. So I just stared back at her. “What are you thinking about over there?”
She sighed. “Do you ever just feel like you’re stuck?”
It was like she was speaking to my soul. “Every day. Like I’ll never actually leave high school.”
“Being the football coach was an interesting choice then,” Kennedy said.
I looked down at my t-shirt. We’d talked a lot during dinner with her mom last night. I could tell she thought it was an odd decision for me to choose to go back to Empire High all the time. “Like I said. I’m stuck.”
“Well, you said you went on that bad blind date. So you’re dating. That’s good.”
“I’m not really dating. I’m not taking that app Penny has me on seriously.”
“But what about your dinner tonight?”
“Business.”
“Ah. Right, you did say that. So you’re not seeing anyone?”
Technically I was dating Poppy now. Barf. The pictures would be plastered all over tomorrow morning’s tabloids. It was just like Poppy had said. The whole city would know by tomorrow night. But my relationship with Poppy wasn’t real. This though? Holding Kennedy’s hand? This felt real. And I didn’t want to talk about Poppy or anyone else with Kennedy. I just wanted to be here right now and be happy for five fucking seconds of my miserable life. So I shook my head. “What about you?”
“I just uprooted my whole life and moved back here. How would I have met someone so quickly?”
“That doesn’t really answer my question.”
She smiled. “I didn’t leave anyone behind, if that’s what you’re asking.”
“What was your last serious relationship?”
“You’re full of questions tonight, Matt. I think it’s time for me to ask one. A very important one. What’s in the other bag?” She eyed the other plastic bag I’d walked in with.
“French fries,” I said and went to grab them. I immediately regretted it. Because my hand fell from hers and my whole body suddenly felt empty.
“Now French fries sound good,” Kennedy said and plucked one out. “Mmm. Just what I was craving.” She grabbed another instead of opening up her ice cream container.
Kennedy had a bad habit of never ordering the right food. She’d stolen so many fries from me while we were in school. I put the takeout bag between us so she could keep stealing my food. I’d never minded then. And I didn’t mind it now either.
She hugged her knees to her chest and watched me.
“What?” I asked.
“Nothing.”
“You should be elevating that,” I said. I reached out and grabbed her ankle, pulling it onto my lap. I placed the ice pack on top. If I couldn’t have her hand, I would at least take her foot.
She just kept silently watching me.
“What?” I asked again.
“On a scale of one to ten, how drunk are you? Like are you going to remember this when you wake up tomorrow?”
“There’s like a 50-50 chance.” As if those odds were somehow in my favor, I lightly ran my thumb along the inside of her ankle, tracing slow circles. She felt it too, right? That it was easier to breathe when we were touching?
She didn’t pull away. “You know, when I was little, I kind of just thought the perfect guy would come find me. Like in all the Disney movies. But the only guy that showed up was Cupcake.”
“That would be a terrible Disney movie.”
“The worst,” she said with a laugh. But her face didn’t look very happy anymore. It looked like she wanted to cry. “And I…I stopped trying.”
“What do you mean you stopped?”
“You asked me what my last serious relationship was. That was it.”
I just stared at her. “With Cupcake?”
She closed her eyes. “He broke me, Matt.” Her voice trembled.
I didn’t want her to be sad. Wasn’t I sad enough for the both of us? “Only if you let him.”
She laughed, even though it was forced. “Right. Sorry.” She wiped at her eyes even though I hadn’t seen a tear actually fall. “We need to pick a movie. And eat French fries and ice cream.” She grabbed the remote.
“I don’t want to do any of those things,” I said.
“But it’s forbidden chocolate.”
“I don’t like forbidden chocolate.”
She looked at me instead of turning on the TV. “Right, you don’t.” She scrunched her mouth to the side like she was trying to remember what I’d liked in high school.
But I wasn’t talking about ice cream right now.
“What flavor do you prefer?”
My gaze dropped to her lips. “You.” The word just tumbled out of me. I couldn’t lie to her about why I was here. It wasn’t for food or a movie. It was to be with her. She was the only person who understood what I’d been through. And she’d just admitted it. She was as broken as me. And in some weird, twisted way, it felt like she’d been waiting all this time for me. Cupcake had been her last serious relationship. She’d never been mine back then. But we were tied together. We were both stuck. Why not be stuck together?