9
He shouldn’t have kissed her last night at the ball and he definitely shouldn’t have kissed her today in his office. Blayne acknowledged this fact while escorting Charlotte along Borough High Street a little over half an hour later. They’d taken a hackney to the south side of the Thames where his favorite bookshop was located, and had chosen to get out and walk when the traffic had slowed to a crawl. From the looks of it, a top-heavy cart transporting barrels had toppled over and was now blocking part of the street. Silver herring-like fish poured out of several damaged barrels, creating a slippery mess for any carriage wanting to pass.
Blayne drew Charlotte against his side, not caring one whit about whether or not it was proper to do so. Somehow, between that first day when she’d shown up at The Black Swan and now, he’d developed a constant craving for her. It wasn’t just sexual. For although he wanted nothing more than to strip her naked and swive her until she forgot her own name, there was something more – a need to simply be near her. He wanted to learn her expressions, savor her smiles and each of her laughs. He liked knowing he was allowed to touch her. Just the gentle press of his hand to her back or the brush of his fingers against her hand was enough to make him feel closer to her than he’d ever felt to anyone before.
And then…
And then there was the passion. Hell, she muddled his brain and lit him on fire in ways he’d not have thought possible until now. Whether she realized it yet or not, the kisses they’d shared so far were forging a bond that could not be broken or forgotten. It had also made him realize that by forcing a deeper connection between them he risked complicating both of their lives. For as she’d said, she didn’t want marriage. And while he’d not been completely honest about his own thoughts on the matter, he knew he could never have her in that way. Which pretty much meant there was no point in allowing such dreams. Instead, he’d focus on what was possible – an oasis in time for them both to look back on later with fondness. As fleeting as it would be, he’d best make every second count. Because he knew she’d be gone from his life again before he was ready.
With this in mind, he led her into Lee & Jones and held the door wide until Daisy had entered as well. The owners of the small shop had chosen to fill it not only with books but with odd bits of furniture too. The effect was charming. It almost felt like one was sitting in a cozy parlor owned by some sort of eccentric artist.
“What do ye think?” Blayne asked with more eagerness than he’d intended.
Charlotte beamed and his heart swelled in gratitude. “It’s absolutely lovely. If only I’d discovered it sooner.”
“Ye’re here now.” With him. Squirrelled away in a small private corner of London. “Come. Let’s see if they’ve got the novel we’re after.”
Taking her by the arm, he steered her toward the bookcases where the literary fiction was kept in alphabetical order. Before they reached them however, a man Blayne instantly recognized as one of the owners came to greet them.
“It’s a pleasure to see you again, sir,” the man said. “And you’ve brought a friend along with you this time.”
“Miss Russell,” Blayne said. “Allow me to introduce ye to Mr. Lee. He and his partner took the run-down building this used to be and turned it into the marvelous retreat it is today.”
“I’m impressed,” Charlotte said. “And it’s a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Lee.”
“Indeed. The pleasure is all mine,” Mr. Lee assured her. “Is there something I can help you find?”
“We’re actually looking for the latest Charles Cunningham novel,” Blayne told him. “The one with the viscount.”
“It’s The Viscount’s Clandestine Meetings,” Charlotte supplied.
“Oh yes. Popular story, that one. It’s right over here.” Turning away, Mr. Lee led them over to a display table where a pyramid of books had been arranged. “This is where we put the latest arrivals. As you can see, Cunningham has another addition. The Marquess’s Unsolved Mysteries came in yesterday and has almost sold out completely since then. We’ve only one copy left.”
“How marvelous for us. We thought we’d be snatching up one new release and instead there are two.” Blayne gave his attention back to Charlotte, only to have the joy knocked out of him when he noticed her pallor. Concerned, he dipped his head and whispered near her ear. “What’s the matter?”
“I… I don’t understand.” She sounded more than a little confused. Clearly something had upset her greatly.
“I’ll be over there by the counter in case you need me,” Mr. Lee said. He’d apparently picked up on the increased tension and the need to offer some privacy.
“Thank ye.” Blayne waited until he’d moved away before turning back to Charlotte. “What don’t ye understand?”
“It’s not possible.” She stared down at the book she held between her hands – The Marquess’s Unsolved Mysteries – and slowly shook her head. “It just can’t be.”
“Would ye like to sit down for a wee bit, lass? Ye’re not looking so well.” Indeed, she seemed to be on the verge of tears. Troubled by her sudden shift in mood, Blayne eased her away from the table and toward a comfortable looking armchair. “I’ll just fetch Daisy for ye. It willnae take a moment.”
Hurrying over to where the books on sewing, knitting, and needlepoint were kept, he located the maid. “There’s something wrong with Charlotte. I think she needs yer help.”
Without hesitation Daisy handed him the book she’d been leafing through and rushed to Charlotte’s side. Blayne watched from a distance while she attempted to ease her mistress’s troubles. It bothered him that he couldn’t discern the cause behind Charlotte’s sudden distress. It also vexed him that she wouldn’t explain it.
“She’d like to go home,” Daisy came to inform him a few seconds later. “Immediately.”
“What happened?” When Daisy made to turn away without providing an answer, he stayed her with his hand. “Tell me.”
“I can’t,” Daisy said with a pained look in her eyes. “I’m sorry.”
Not good enough.
He cared too much about Charlotte and her well-being to let her or her maid brush him off when she clearly required assistance. Hell, she’d hired him to protect her. And now… Well, now there were all sorts of confusing feelings whirling around inside him. They’d kissed, damn it. Twice. That had to mean he was more to her than a passing fancy.
Without second guessing himself even once, he stormed past Daisy and sank into a crouching position in front of Charlotte. “Ye ken ye can trust me.”
Her gaze seemed to focus on his. She blinked, and finally nodded.
Good.
He reached for her hand and gently held it. “Tell me what this is about.”
Instead of confiding as he had hoped, she gave her head a small shake and closed her eyes.
“Please,” he begged. “Whatever it is, let me help ye sort it out.”
She bit her lip and indecision filled her eyes. She wanted to confide in him but something was holding her back.