Prologue
Dillon – The night Vivien leaves Ireland
“You disgust me.” My sister’s pretty face contorts into a scowl as she glares at me before shooting daggers at the gold digger situated in my lap. Aoife paws at my chest, her fingers creeping upward to my neck. Before Viv, Aoife’s touch used to turn me on. Now, she makes my skin crawl because the touch is all wrong. Too desperate. Too harsh. Not the soft loving caresses from the only woman who matters. A woman who has just poured her heart out to me in front of everyone. A woman who just bled her truths at my feet.
But it’s not enough.
She’s still leaving.
To go back to him.
Anger glides up my throat, and a muscle clenches in my jaw, the same way it always does whenever I think of Reeve Lancaster.
“More than that, you disappoint me,” Ash continues, shaking her head sadly. “I know you love her, Dil. You can deny it until you’re blue in the face, and I won’t believe you. You love her. She loves you.” Leaning down, she puts her face all up in mine. “Fight for her, for fuck’s sake.”
I tried, and it didn’t work. Even if I were to run outside and chase her, it won’t change a damn thing. Viv is still getting on that plane to return to L.A.
To return to my twin.
I asked her to choose me, and she rejected me.
It’s over, and the sooner my sister understands that, the better.
“It was a summer fling, and we both knew it had an end date.” I shrug, bringing my beer to my lips. “The only one who doesn’t seem to get that is you.” I swallow a healthy mouthful of beer, hoping the alcohol will calm the violent emotional storm brewing inside me.
“I never took you for a coward, Dil, but that’s exactly what you are.”
Aoife drops a line of kisses on my neck, and my skin itches like I’ve stumbled upon a bed of nettles. I need my sister to fuck off so I can get rid of the parasite on my lap. My gaze lifts to my best friend in silent communication.
“Ash.” Jamie reaches for my sister, but she swats his arm away.
“I’m going after Viv,” she tells him, “because someone has to make sure she’s okay.” She sends one last scathing look in my direction before storming off.
Aoife giggles at Ash’s retreating back. “You’re well rid of that stuck-up American bitch,” she says, pressing her ass down on my flaccid cock.
I shove her off my lap, needing her the fuck away from me. Ro rides to the rescue, grabbing Aoife around the waist before she hits the deck.
“What the hell, Dil?” Aoife plants her hands on her hips, pinning me with an angry stare.
“Fuck off.” I don’t look at her as I spit the words out, bringing the bottle to my lips and draining the rest of my beer.
“I can tell you’re in one of your moods, so I’ll forgive you.” She plonks down on my lap again.
“Are you fucking deaf as well as stupid?” I hiss, shoving her harder. This time, she lands unceremoniously on the ground, whimpering while fixing me with hurt eyes. “I don’t want you. I’ve never wanted you. You were nothing more than a hole to fuck when I needed a release.”
Ro helps Aoife to her feet, glaring at me. “Don’t be an even bigger asshole. It’s not fair to take this out on Aoife. You fucked this up. You. Not anyone else.”
Jamie whispers in Aoife’s ear, and she leaves, taking her three friends with her. “Ro.” Jamie shakes his head. “Drop it.”
“No, Jay. I won’t drop it. He needs to get his head out of his ass and remember where his priorities lie.”
Conor leans back in his chair, nodding in silent agreement.
“We have a real opportunity this time,” Ro continues, “and he’s not going to fuck it up for all of us.”
An opportunity we wouldn’t have if it wasn’t for Viv. My brother seems to have forgotten that. “Don’t hold back, bro. Say what you really think.”
“You knew what you had with her was temporary, so stop acting like someone ran over your dog. You should apologize and end things amicably. Ash is right in that respect, but you have no right to be pissed at Viv for returning home when it was the plan all along.”
He has no idea how close I came to giving it all up. How I was prepared to quit the band and stay by her side if she had told me she’d stay.
I love music. I love performing. I’m happy doing what we’re doing, and it’s enough for me because I don’t want the nasty side of fame. I don’t want my private life under a microscope, and not because the truth about my twin brother would most likely come out. Why can’t the music be enough? We could make a comfortable living producing and streaming our own stuff. Playing local events. Building a loyal fanbase locally. But it won’t be enough for Jamie and Ronan. Even Conor is champing at the bit at the prospect this A&R scout might want to sign us.
Going to America and making it big has never been my dream, but I’ll do it for the guys, for my brother, because there is nothing holding me here now anyway.
“What is she doing here?” I slur a few hours later, spotting Aoife standing a few feet away, scowling in my direction.
“Ro invited her.” Jamie flops down beside me on the sofa. He hands me a beer, and I drain the last dregs of the one in my hand before tossing it on the carpeted floor. “You know your brother is a bleeding heart. Apparently, she was crying in the toilets at Bruxelles, so he took pity on her.”
“I hope he’s planning to fuck her because I’m not ever going there again.” I pop the cap on my beer, glugging a few mouthfuls.
“You should go after Viv. It’s not too late,” he says, glancing at the time on his mobile phone.
“Nah.” I scrunch up my nose. “Ro is right. It was always leading to this point.”
“I’m calling bullshit.” Jamie scrubs a hand along his stubbly jawline. “There is no shame in admitting you’re hurting. I know you love her. We all saw it happening.”
It wasn’t supposed to go down like this.
I was going to steal her heart.
She wasn’t supposed to steal mine.
But steal it she did. The plan was to make her fall in love with me and then break her heart so badly he got a shell of the woman he loved back. My heart was never meant to get involved, but she reeled me in before I even realized what was happening. She made me feel things I have never felt before. Love. Hope. Possibility. She made me believe I was worthy. That things could be different, and for a little while there, I believed in a future where we were together.
Yet it wasn’t real. She was always preparing to return to him.
Now, I’m the one left nursing a broken heart while she swans back to that selfish prick.
How does he do this? How does he always come out on top? I have never hated anyone as much as I hate Reeve Lancaster and his father. I hate them with a burning intensity that grows hotter and stronger with every passing day.
“What is that slut doing here?” Ash snaps, materializing in front of us an hour later. The party is in full swing now, and our small living room is bursting at the seams. Music thumps through the loudspeakers, almost drowning out the sound of conversation and laughter.