Zed gave a soft growl of warning and placed a gentle kiss on my jaw. "What did I tell you about apologizing? Tell me what I can do. What eased the fear just before?"
I rapidly thought it through. That first flash of fear... what had eased it off? It’d been Zed. It was always Zed. I just needed to stay present with Zed and not give Chase or my trauma any space between us. I haltingly told him as much, feeling all kinds of broken, but he just took it in with a calm nod.
"Let's try this," he murmured. He reached over past my head and flicked the bedside lamp on, filling the room with light. Then he propped his head up on his hand right beside my head. "Better?"
My lips parted, confused, but then I realized what he was doing. I needed to stay in the moment with Zed, so he’d turned the lights on and eliminated the darkness and shadows from the room. So when he leaned in to kiss me again, there was absolutely no mistaking that it was Zed.
"Yes," I sighed between kisses. "It's better."
"Thank fuck," he replied with a pained laugh. "Can I...?"
"Please do," I said, rocking my hips to give him permission to move once more. I had to commend his control for remaining balls deep inside me while talking me through the start of a fucking panic attack.
Still, he took his time kissing me as he shifted his weight once more and started out slow, moving between my legs with shallow strokes. With the lights on, I could see the tension in his brow and the worry in his eyes, and it soothed my monsters. Zed would never hurt me like Chase had, and he wasn't to blame for the outcome of our first kiss. I needed to break through that wall once and for all, and this... this was the perfect sledgehammer.
"Zed," I moaned, arching my back and tilting my hips to feel him deeper. "Fuck me properly; I won't break."
He huffed a breathless laugh, kissing my neck. "I know you won't. You're harder than diamonds and a hundred times more beautiful."
Oh shit. My heart almost leapt straight out of my chest and into the palm of his hand. "Zed..." I pleaded. My pussy was throbbing and desperate, not giving a fuck that we'd been working through some major psychological damage.
"Yes, boss," he chuckled, picking up the pace and slamming his hips into mine with a little more force. His gaze held me as he worked, barely even blinking as he kept my attention captive. "More?"
I jerked a hasty nod, and he grinned.
"Alright. Stay with me, baby." He winked, then hooked his hands under my thighs to force my legs wider apart and my knees almost up around my elbows. He changed his position subtly, and then he started fucking me for real. My chest heaved with labored breathing as he slammed into me, over and over. Every time my mind started to slip away—and it did, more times than I could count—he was there, meeting my eyes, reassuring me that I was safe. Fucking hell, it worked too.
When my cunt started tightening and my core filled with that rapidly building euphoria, I grabbed onto his neck, bringing his lips back to mine so I could kiss him as I came. And holy crap, did I come. Zed swallowed my screams greedily, his cock striking me deep and hitting the perfect place to prolong my orgasm like nothing I'd ever felt before.
He waited until I was done—and I wasn't even remotely quick—before he finished off himself with a couple of hard thrusts. It only sparked the need in me for more, and I found myself writhing under him as he came, panting and groaning.
"Holy shit, Dare," he said with a laugh when my hips continued moving. "Hold on, baby, I've got you."
With that sinful promise, he slid down the bed, hooked my legs over his shoulders, and dove face first into my pulsing cunt. He didn't even flinch at the fact that his own cum was inside me, just used his tongue and his fingers to send me screaming into another, otherworldly intense climax. And then another.
"What the fuck?" I gasped when my spirit returned to my body.
Zed just gave me the smuggest of smiles and climbed back up to lie beside me on his bed. Then he reached out and stroked some stray hair away from my face with a gesture so tender it made my chest ache.
"We good?" he asked, his own voice rough and husky.
I sighed, more relaxed than I could ever remember feeling. "We're beyond good, Zed, and you damn well know it."
He just smirked and kissed my sweaty shoulder.
Therapy really did come in all shapes and sizes after all. Mine just happened to be in the form of my six-foot-four, well-dressed, and well-hung best friend.
24
After that first time with Zed, everything seemed to change. Not just in the freedom we'd unlocked to explore one another in ways we'd both been dreaming about for years, but inside my mind. It was like breaking through that wall had healed a festering wound in my soul, and every subsequent orgasm at Zed's hands—or mouth or cock—only soothed it further.
"Anyone who tries to tell me sex isn't therapeutic," I mumbled into the pillow when I crashed out, half dead as the sun started rising on the horizon, "can kiss my ass."
Zed gave a husky laugh, crashing into the mattress beside me. "I'd never argue that fact, but I'd happily kiss this anytime you asked." He slapped my bare rump, making me squeak. I was too exhausted to do anything more than that, though.
"How's your scratch?" I asked, turning my face to the side so I could meet his eyes. It'd started bleeding again somewhere around the time he'd had one of my legs over my head, and I'd made him stop and patch it up before he was allowed to fuck me again.
Zed rolled slightly to the side, peering down at the new bandage. "Totally fine, basically healed already."
I just smiled, and he reached out to stroke his knuckles over my cheekbone.
"We should shower," I said with a sigh. "And sleep. Otherwise, we'll both be worse than useless at work today."
Zed arched a brow at me like he wasn't sure if I was serious or not. Then he got up, headed to the bathroom, and returned with his phone in hand. He climbed back into bed beside me, bringing his phone to his ear.
"Hannah," he said when the call connected. "Cancel all of Hades’s appointments today. She's taking a sick day."
Startled, I pushed up to sitting and tried to grab his phone, but he scooted out of reach with a sly grin on his face.
"That's right," he replied to Hannah, "hold all her calls too. She needs to stay in bed all day with no distractions." He shot me a wink, and my whole body lit up with desire again. It was like the more of Zed I had, the more I wanted. "Excellent, thank you Hannah. Oh, and I'm also unavailable." He ended the call quickly, not giving her a chance to question him further, and I groaned.
"You asshole. You basically just told my new assistant that we’re fucking." I smacked him with a playful punch. He caught my hand before I could pull back, though, and kissed my knuckles one at a time.
"Good," he growled, all possessive caveman. "I want the whole fucking world to know that you're mine."
A ripple of unease struck me at that, and I inhaled deeply. We really should have had a clear conversation about how this would all play out with Cass and Lucas... because I wasn't giving them up, no matter how strong my feelings for Zed were.