Ashington stood between my legs as he continued the kiss that had become something more untamed. It felt as if he might devour me or I him. My hands slid up his arms and into his hair of their own accord, and I craved to taste more and draw closer to him. He smelled of sweet wine and cinnamon. It was intoxicating and seemed to only cause me to cling to him more desperately.
He stepped closer to me and one of his hands slid over the top of my thigh. The sharp ache that shot through me, beginning at my most sensitive area, caused me to gasp. My hands tightened in his hair and he inhaled sharply, pausing the kiss.
I had a moment to catch my breath, but the sweet throbbing that had started between my legs was not easing as his body pressed so very close. Opening my eyes slowly, afraid this was all going to end, and wanting to be lost in the sensations that were now teasing me with what more there may be to all of this, I braced myself and looked at Ashington.
The flare of heat in his eyes as he watched me, once again, took my breath away. It was as if everything I was experiencing in my body was there in his gaze. Perhaps this was a reflection of my soul or more likely my wanton desire. For although I knew this was not proper and very dangerous, I wanted more. The sensations were all new to me and I now understood why ladies lost their morals and fell into bed with a man. Tossing away their good name for a moment like this one was an easier accident than I had once thought.
Ashington moved the hand that was on my thigh and I wanted to protest, but when I felt his fingers brush the bare skin of my calf, any words I would have spoken were forgotten. His hand moved ever so slowly up my bare leg and under the night gown until he was once again at the top of my thigh. My nails dug into his forearms as my body hummed with anticipation. The ache between my legs was more intense than any sexual description in a book I had stumbled upon had caused. I felt the urge to beg for release, but I did not speak. I dropped my gaze from his and watched his hand under the cotton material of my gown.
His hand moved to the inside of my thigh and paused for just a moment before his fingers brushed closer to where I knew he should not touch, but I wanted so desperately to be touched there I feared I would cry if he stopped.
Once again, his mouth was on mine and I moved even closer, unable to wait any longer. When his fingers finally met the throbbing heat, I made a sound something close to a cry or possibly a plea. Whatever the sound, it was enough to end the slow torture. Ashington moved quickly then. My nightgown was completely bunched at my waist and my legs opened farther as his right hand covered my needy core and his left hand pulled my neckline down, causing the fabric to tear as he bared my breasts.
I thought for the briefest of moments that protesting and covering myself was what I should do, but one single finger began to fill me and the need that was growing flamed brighter. My hips moved against him and I moaned unable to control my body. It was delicious and intoxicating. Nothing mattered but this. I wanted to feel this way always.
Ashington moved his mouth from mine to trail kisses along my jawline and then his head lowered as he took one of my nipples into his mouth and sucked. My entire body ignited and I was lost to it all. My head fell back and I cried out as a burning sensation mixed with pure pleasure coursed through every nerve of my body.
I called out his name in a moan as I rocked against the pressure of his hand. His mouth moved from one breast to the other and I lay there almost naked on a wooden table in his kitchen like a woman with no morals. Knowing how I must look, I did not care. It was impossible to care when I wanted nothing more than to experience this pure rapture. Tomorrow was a faraway time and place that meant nothing to me.
I grabbed a fistful of Ashington’s hair as I looked down at him still suckling my breast, biting down just enough to be painfully erotic. He lifted his head then so that his gaze found mine. Every glorious sensation wracking my body was there in his eyes. My chest tightened and something deeper happened inside me. Something more pronounced than the act of sexual pleasure. A slow panic began to unwind in me as I realized that I was indeed in danger of loving this man. Making myself vulnerable and I didn’t trust enough to feel elation. Fear began to trickle in and the scene in which we were in became clearer.
Just as I was about to reach down and cover myself, unsure what I would say or if I could even walk, Ashington’s head lowered yet again, but he moved until he was kneeling between my legs. Words failed me and another panic burst forth, although it had no time to cause a reaction. The wet warm touch of his tongue slid along the sensitive folds that had betrayed me already with the desire pulsing from the needy area.
As he began to taste me where I had never been touched by another until tonight, I forgot the sudden moment of clarity and cried out his name. There were no words descriptive enough to prepare one for the sheer bliss of the action. Ashington took my left leg and draped it over his shoulder as he continued his licking against the tight bud of my desire.
My breathing was coming in pants and as much as I wanted to watch him, I could no longer hold myself up to do so. Laying back on the cold wooden table, I stared at the ceiling my breast heaving with my erratic breathing. The build was there, clawing at me. Inside my body, it was as if every delightful experience was now burning together unable to contain itself. Just when I was sure I could no longer stand it, the pleasure went off inside me like an explosion.
“ASHINGTON!” came out as a loud cry from my lips and my body spiraled toward something so beautiful, I was lost to it. There was a roaring in my ears and I was sure nothing would ever be the same.
Chapter Thirty-Two
Earl of Ashington
The line had been crossed and I was completely to blame. I picked up the shawl forgotten on the floor and wrapped it around Miriam’s shoulders then pulled her into my arms. It was clear I wouldn’t be able to let her go now. In my weakness, I hadn’t sated my desire for Miriam, but ignited it. If I wasn’t so positive she had enjoyed what had just taken place on the kitchen work table then I would be concerned by her silence.
I couldn’t be positive that a servant didn’t happen upon us during that time either. My thoughts had been on her solely. However, I was sure of their loyalty and silence. They were paid well and treated even better. This was to be their future countess and her name was not to be tarnished.
Miriam sagged against me as I held her and I pressed a kiss to her head as if she were a child. “I’ll walk you to your room. You need your sleep,” I said gently.
She nodded against my chest and when she lifted her face to meet my gaze, her cheeks were still flushed from her release. “I do not believe I will require warm milk after all,” she said softly, causing my smile to spread.
“Perhaps not,” I replied.
She gave me but a very small shy smile. Reluctantly, for I wished nothing more than to take her to my room and to my bed with me, I began our walk to her bedchambers. The silence was for the best as we passed through the hallway. Finding one of her family members awake and hearing us would cause an issue we did not need. When I asked for Miriam, I wanted it to be for no other reason than my desire for her to be my wife. No other dark shadows should hang upon the moment. No cause for her to believe my hand had been forced by her uncle.
When we made it to her door, I considered joining her, but then I did not know of her sister’s habits when it came to visiting her. We had taken a chance in the kitchen. One I would never regret, however, I doubted we would be so lucky to continue in her room without notice.