“Can’t say I feel any sympathy,” Sawyer says.
“I didn’t either. He couldn’t dump me fast enough. Backtracking and trying to make amends with his wife. He tried to deflect all the blame on me.”
“What a jerk.”
“I thought I was in love with him.” It seems there is no end to my stupidity. “But I meant nothing to him. He abandoned me when I needed him the most. Senior year was sheer hell because every one of my friends abandoned me and the jocks and popular kids loved taunting me. Stuffing my locker with lube and gay magazines. Some asshole even printed a screenshot from the video and plastered it all over the town.”
Sawyer pulls me into his arms, and I go willingly. “I’m sorry you had to deal with that.”
I let him comfort me for a few seconds before I pull away. Pain tears strips off my fragile heart. “I swore when I left North Dakota behind for good that I would never again be duped. That I would only give myself to someone who was worthy of me. Someone who genuinely loves me. Yet, I keep making the same fucking mistakes. I never learn.” I slap a hand to my brow. “I’m so fucking dumb.”
“I’m the dumb one,” Sawyer says, gripping my wrist and pulling it away from my face so he can see me. “I’m the one who was never worthy of you. I was too scared to open up and let you in, and I hurt you in the process. As long as I live, I will never forgive myself for that.” Fierce determination slants across his face as he moves closer, sliding his arm around my back. “I’m so fucking sorry, Xavier. I’m sorry I let you down, but I meant what I said earlier.”
His features soften, and deep emotion shimmers in his eyes. “I love you, Bright One. I love you more than I have ever loved anyone, and that terrifies the fuck out of me. Deep down, I have known that for some time, but I was too much of a chicken shit to confront it, let alone admit it to you or tell my parents. If you give me another chance, I promise I will put you first. I promise I will make everything right.”
I want to believe him. So bad. But I don’t trust my judgment anymore. And I don’t trust his words because it would be too easy to wrap them around my heart in an attempt to paper over the cracks. “Words aren’t enough, Sawyer. And it’s too late. You’re married.”
“I’m divorcing her,” he says, holding me closer. Our chests brush, sending a wave of desire pooling south. My dick thickens, and I feel his cock hardening too through the flimsy pajama pants he’s wearing. “I don’t care about anything but you. I’m sorry it took tonight for me to wake the fuck up. Thinking you were dead.” His voice cracks, and tears pool in his eyes. “It destroyed me, Xavier. All I could think was you died not knowing I love you.” He presses his brow to mine. “I know I need to prove to you I’m sincere. I understand it more now you’ve explained about your past. I know it will take time, but I’m not giving up.” He presses a hard kiss to my mouth, and I groan as his erection brushes against mine, sending fresh need shooting through my veins.
I’m hard as a rock now and ready to fuck all these pent-up feelings out.
“I’m going to fight for you, Xavier.”
I thought he looked determined before, but that’s nothing on the look of dogged resolve on his face now.
“And I’m not giving up until I get you back. We belong together, and I won’t rest until you believe it’s true.”
23
Xavier
“You say you’ve changed?” I challenge, pushing him flat on his back, throwing my towel aside and straddling his hips. “Then prove it. Let me take my pleasure from your body because that is the only thing I am willing to offer you.”
“I’ll take you however I can get you,” he says, reaching out to cup my face. “Do what you want to me. You know I’ll love it.”
I arch a brow and chuckle as I move my hands along his warm, bare chest. “Now, now, Sawyer. Don’t lie. We both know how much you love to dominate me. How much you need to be in control.”
“That doesn’t mean I’m not prepared to relinquish control or I didn’t enjoy bottoming with you.” He wets his lips, looking nervous. “I never told you this. I should have. But you were my first.”
“Bullshit.” I narrow my eyes, wondering what game he’s playing. “Don’t fucking lie to me. You were tight, but not that tight.”
“I’ve used my fingers and toys. A lot. On my own and with previous partners. I like having a cock in my ass, but I never trusted any man to fuck me with his dick until you.”
I know he’s not lying. The truth is written all over his face, and I get an enormous thrill from it. Bending down, I smash my lips to his as I grind on top of his dick through his light pants. Something hard brushes against the metal of my dick piercing and I stall, pulling my mouth back and straightening up. “What was that?”
A wide grin spreads across his mouth, and it’s like getting sucker punched in the nuts. Sawyer is gorgeous. Hot as fuck. Sexy as fuck. Best lay I’ve ever had. I’m horny as fuck and if this is what I think it is, I’m likely to shoot my load in seconds. “Take off my pants and see,” he purrs, using that hypnotic sexy deep voice of his.
I scramble off his legs in record time, yanking his pants down and quickly getting rid of them. Leaning down, I inspect his magnificent cock up close and personal. “Holy fucking shit, Sawyer. You did it. You got your cock pierced.” He has a Prince Albert piercing at the crown like me. Unlike me, he also has four ladders down his shaft. I trace my finger down his length, and he hisses.
“Before you ask,” he says, his cock bobbing as my tongue darts out, licking his hard, warm flesh and the cool metal of his many piercings. “I did this for you. It was just before everything went to shit, and I hadn’t had time to show you.”
I climb over him, straddling him again, skin to skin. “Is that the truth?”
“One hundred percent.”
“Why?” I teased Sawyer mercilessly over being pure because he has no piercings and only one small tattoo on his arm.
“Because your dick feels incredible sliding in and out of my ass with the piercing and I want you to experience the same.”
“Fuck me taking pleasure from your body,” I murmur, pressing kisses all over his chest. “I need your dick in my ass. Stat.”
Sawyer grabs the back of my head, pulling me down hard on top of him, as his mouth fuses with mine. His tongue plunges into my mouth, and we grind against one another as we ravage each other with our lips and tongues. My hands roam his gorgeous body, reacquainting myself with every chiseled dip and curve. Sawyer flips me onto my back, and I scrape my nails down his spine and knead his ass cheeks as he thrusts against me. “Fuck. I have missed sex with you,” he rasps in my ear before biting my neck like a vampire.
I lick my fingers before finding his puckered hole. I push two digits in, enjoying how his cock jerks against mine, and he curses against my lips. I pump my fingers in and out of his ass as my hips thrust up and we rub against one another. Our kissing turns more frantic, our touching more wild, until I can’t take it anymore.