Man, I was a shitty friend. Cat finally had some time off and she’d kept my company with mild grumbling.
Tomorrow was the first, and I’d vowed to start getting my life together beginning then. Might as well get a jump on it and be ready at the stroke of midnight. I let out a long, overly loud breath. “Where are we going?”
Cat leaned in. “We’re taking you, that’s all you need to know.”
“I don’t get to know where?”
“A New Year’s Eve party. Let’s leave it at that.”
There was no joke in her tone, no mischief, only her showing me how much she wanted to do this for me. She held out the hangers.
Stepping into the bathroom, I took them from her hand and closed the door. I was being a stubborn, colossal asshole. All they were trying to do was help. “Thanks, Cat.”
“You’d do the same for me. Get dressed and we’ll figure out hair and makeup once we know which dress you’re choosing,” she shouted. I could tell her mouth was pressed right against the wood with her hands cupped around it.
I ripped the plastic off the first dress. It was a bright red mini halter dress that looked like it doubled as a bikini. I wasn’t in the mood for an eleventh-hour asshole-bleaching to wear this. I also didn’t feel like freezing my ass off.
The second was a backless number that would most definitely show off my butt crack if I breathed too deeply.
Readying myself up for this evening to get even harder, I sent up a prayer to the god of crazy friends that the previous two had been a colossal joke.
Peeking through one eye, I tore into the final bag. Both eyes popped open. Inside was a shimmering emerald dress with three-quarter-length sleeves. The sequins that didn’t catch the light were shaded and looked dark green, like a Hunter green. This was a disco-ball version of the dress I’d worn the night Hunter broke up with me—or had I broken up with him?
Either way, it was the only option and flattered me, which was always a double plus in my book. I slipped the dress on and was contorting myself to finish with the zipper.
“Are you wearing the red one?” Cat knocked and shouted.
“How’d you know?” I looked at myself in the mirror for the first time in days. My skin no longer looked like I was having an allergic reaction to the air, but the bags under my eyes were dark and deep. They’d need a truckload of makeup to smooth it all out.
“Do I need to come in there after you?”
“I swear, you’re the pushiest, most annoying person I’ve ever met.” I jerked the door open.
The two of them were perched on the edge of the bed.
“Ohhh, turn, I love it.” Zara clapped then circled her finger in the air.
I put my arms out wide like I was preparing for a pat down and spun for them.
“It’s gorgeous. We’ve got all the supplies and not much time, so let’s get to it.” She grabbed my shoulders and sat me down at the desk where her spread of makeup was neatly laid out.
“Not much time for what?”
Cat picked up a brush and flicked the soft brown bristles against my cheeks. “Before the ball drops. We’ll need to get you nice and loosened up by then. Tonight’s excursion is sponsored by the Ivans. Town car, open bar wherever we go.”
“Such generous bosses.”
She rolled her eyes. “It’s all a ploy to make sure I’m there tomorrow. The driver will spirit me back home at a respectable time. but don’t think I won’t take advantage of all they’re offering. My gift horses don’t get looked in the mouth, they get saddled and ridden.” Lifting one arm, she whipped it overhead, waving her imaginary lasso.
Zara picked up a powder foundation and brush and started on my overly shiny forehead.
“Do you know what you’re getting into?” I whispered to Zara loud enough for Cat to hear.
She laughed and nodded. “It’ll be fun. Who doesn’t want to spend a night out on the town with their girlfriends?”
Ones with boyfriends. I stopped myself from saying it. She should be out with Leo, dancing with him in a restaurant with a spectacular view of the fireworks where they’d toast champagne at the stroke of midnight and kiss under a volley of bright and bombastic glitter in the sky. Instead she was stuck here with me, although she didn’t look stuck. Neither of them had made me feel like I was a burden.
“Thanks for tonight. I needed a kick in the ass.”
They exchanged a look and responded in unison. “We know.”
So the night began. The life I’d thought I’d been building with Hunter was gone, and I was back to the foundation. It hurt. The ache was there, insistent and always right behind my sternum.
Cat and Zara had put in a lot of work, and I wouldn’t spoil it. I’d take the first step out of my self-imposed seclusion and onward to my future—alone.
41
Hunter
“Thank you guys again for doing this.” I shook Camden’s hand in the backstage greenroom where the rest of the guys had been hanging throughout the show.
He sat on the worn and sagging brown leather couch that looked like it had been through more debauchery than either of us could imagine.
“Don’t mention it. You’re helping with the Maddy situation; it’s the least we could do. Plus, I can’t say I don’t get wanting to make a total fool of yourself for someone you care about.” His tone was light, but there was an undercurrent that told me he got this on a deeper level than he was letting on.
“Thanks for the vote of confidence.” I laughed; it felt brittle in my chest. So far there hadn’t been any word from Leo or Zara about Sabrina.
Maybe Zara had told her what was going on and she’d said screw that and refused to leave her hotel room. I couldn’t blame her. If she didn’t show up tonight, I’d have to figure out another option. Funny how after all her work to get me to talk to Ryder, the last person I’d wanted to talk to, here I was needing to convince her to talk to me. It felt like an apt part of the punishment I’d already been visiting on myself.
“You forget, I was there for sound check.” Camden stuck his finger in his ear like it was still ringing.
“It wasn’t that bad.”
He grabbed my shoulder. “Whatever you say, man, but thank you from the bottom of my heart. After you’re out there singing, my voice will sound even better, so you’re doing me a favor.”
“Happy to help.”
He grinned, the blue in his eyes catching all the light in the room before bursting into laughter. “I’m just kidding, man. I think it’s cool what you’re doing, and I hope she loves it.”
“She might hate it, if she even shows up. I’m pretty sure she hates me after what I did.” I reached for the glass of water on the table and fumbled it. It pitched to the industrial-carpeted floor, the contents creating a pool in front of me. “Shit.”
I’d been a mess all day. It was a surprise I’d even been able to dress myself. My stomach had been a roiling mess for days. I couldn’t sit still, and focusing on anything beyond what was right in front of my face was almost impossible. The guys had taken on a lot of extra work and backed me up at every turn.