He started slow and steady, but she urged him on with gasps of “Yes” and “Harder” and “Faster.” So he intensified his thrusting until the bed was shaking and his vision had blurred over in pleasure.
She came again just before he did, crying out in surprise as the orgasm caught her unexpectedly. Then he totally lost it, rasping out his own climax as pleasure exploded out from where they were joined and shuddered through his whole body.
He tried not to be too loud, but he wasn’t in any condition to know. He was helpless against the way he was feeling.
They were both gasping loud and fast when he finally collapsed on top of her. She wrapped her arms around him and held him tight.
She was everything he’d ever wanted, and he had her right now. He had her completely.
And he wasn’t sure what he would do if he wasn’t allowed to have her forever.
That thought, despite coming from a good place, took root in his head and festered.
What would he do? If Serena backed out. If she decided this wasn’t what she wanted after all.
In the light of day, it was easier to persuade himself with reason and logic. To look at all available clues and come to a convincing conclusion that, with patience and understanding, she would eventually settle her anxieties about their relationship.
But at the moment he was stripped bare. As vulnerable as he’d ever been.
And the idea of losing Serena—after he’d almost, almost had her—was too simply too much.
He was with her right now. She was naked in his arms. And she’d already opened herself up to him in ways he’d never been sure she could do. But he still wanted more. He wanted everything.
The fear took hold until it swallowed him up, and the only lifeline he could grab onto was escape.
He needed to get up anyway. There was the condom to deal with. He could go to the bathroom and recover his sense and control.
If the bathroom was the only route of escape available to him, he would take it.
eight
SERENA FELT LIKE GIGGLING from pure, unadulterated joy.
She didn’t. She was afraid that might be silly. So instead, when Keith climbed back into bed beside her after taking care of the condom and going to the bathroom, she burrowed against his side and snuggled into the arm he had wrapped around her.
Nothing could feel better than right now. This second. Still deliciously tired and sated from the sex they just had and thrilled by the knowledge that giving themselves to each other this way hadn’t sent everything they were tumbling into chaos.
It hadn’t destroyed their friendship.
In fact, it had made things even better.
She wasn’t sure what she’d been so afraid of all this time. They loved each other too much to let their relationship fall apart.
As Keith slowly stroked her hair and back, Serena smiled and pressed a couple of little kisses on his chest. This was good. This was perfect. This was exactly as it should be between them.
It didn’t matter if she deserved it. If she didn’t have all her issues and baggage dealt with completely. Keith cared about her anyway. He wanted her anyway.
She could trust that if she could trust anything at all.
“I think I’m ready to go to sleep now,” she told him after a minute. “I’m pretty worn out.”
“Me too.”
“You’ll stay the night with me?” She tilted her head to check his expression.
He gave her his little smile. “Of course.”
“Good.” She kissed him lightly and then got more comfortable in the circle of his arm.
He wasn’t saying much. In fact, he seemed unusually quiet. At a different time, that might have worried her. But after the way they’d had sex just now—the intensity, the authenticity—she couldn’t doubt his feelings for her. He’d never given her any reason to.
He was probably tired. Just like her. They could sleep now and talk in the morning.
They’d have to tell Eva something. She’d have questions when she woke up tomorrow morning and Keith was still here. But they could deal with that in the morning too.
She was still smiling as she fell asleep.
WHEN SHE WOKE UP, IT was with an awareness that something was wrong.
Very, very wrong.
She had no idea what it was. She was in her own bed. In her own darkened room. A glance at the clock proved it was just after midnight.
Nothing strange or unusual in any of that.
But her body was sore—particularly between her legs. And her bed smelled like Keith and sex.
The few seconds of disorientation cleared with a flood of memory and emotions and realization.
She’d had sex with Keith a couple of hours ago. He’d said he’d stay the night.
And now he was gone.
The most obvious answer was that he was in the bathroom, but she could see the connecting door was open, not closed. Frowning, she pushed herself to a sitting position and swung her legs over the side of the bed. She listened but couldn’t hear anything in the silent apartment.
She’d pulled her nightgown back on after they’d had sex so she just had to stick her feet into her slippers before she got up to investigate the rest of the apartment.
He probably just needed some water or a snack. He was probably sitting at her kitchen bar, scrolling through his phone. He’d give her an adorable smile and ask what she was doing awake.
Eva’s bedroom door was still closed as she passed it. And the lights in the living room and kitchen were still off. She peered around in the darkness.
No Keith.
There wasn’t any more of her apartment left to investigate.
He wasn’t here.
Her heart was pounding now. Fear and dread and something else. Something akin to heartbreak. But that would be a ridiculous overreaction to the situation, so she didn’t indulge it. Instead, she stepped out of her apartment and knocked on his door.
Nothing.
Surely he wouldn’t have gone to sleep next door without leaving a text or note or something. That would be as un-Keith-like as it was possible to be. But then where was he? Why had he left when he’d told her he would spend the night?
She went back into her apartment and strode to the sliders that led out onto the small balcony. Stepping outside, she studied the parking lot to see if Keith’s car was in its place.
It was. He had a blue, three-year-old Explorer that he’d bought when he got his current job. It was parked in its usual spot. But she could see a figure sitting in the driver’s seat, lit up faintly by the dashboard lights.
He was in his car, and he’d turned on the ignition.
Holding her breath, she waited, but he didn’t back out of the space and drive away.
He just sat there.
Confusion vying with despair, she went back inside and grabbed a robe from her room. She was tying the sash as she peeked into Eva’s room. The girl was still asleep. After a few seconds of internal debate, Serena made a decision.
She took her keys so she could lock the apartment behind her, and then she ran downstairs to the parking lot where Keith was still sitting in his car.
Closer, she could see his posture was hunched, exhausted, defeated. His head was leaning forward toward the steering wheel. And he just sat there.
Every instinct in her body screamed at her to run to him, comfort him, take care of him. He was upset, and she couldn’t stand for him to ever feel that way.