I didn’t want any wine. I still felt a little raw from the conversation gone awry with my mother earlier in the day as well as seeing and kinda kissing Jackson before walking into the jam session with Sienna and Charlotte. I hadn’t meant to kiss Jackson when I’d called him over. I didn’t think he’d begun the conversation expecting to kiss me.
And yet, that’s what happened.
“I’ll have a half glass of whatever red you’ve got open. If nothing is open, I’ll take water. But then I need to grab my kids and go.” Charlotte sat next to me, leaning her elbows on the table.
Sienna had arranged for two sitters to come and watch the seven children—three were Sienna’s, four were Charlotte’s. As it was just past 10:30 PM, all of the kids were currently asleep.
“No. Leave them, Charlotte. Let them sleep. Just spend the night. We have tons of room.” Sienna grabbed a wineglass from a cabinet and poured much more than a half glass of wine. “And look at that. I accidentally poured too much. We don’t waste good wine in this house.”
“Fine. Twist my arm.” Charlotte lifted her hand to accept the heavy pour and sighed. “I am tired. I don’t think I’ve been up this late in twelve years, not since before Kimmy was born. Hey, how do you think it went?”
“Great.” Sienna sent us both a grin. “Really, really great. You two convinced me.”
I sent Charlotte a small smile. “Charlotte made it easy.”
When people had spotted me and Charlotte together, arms linked and laughing, they had appeared taken aback at first. But once Sienna spread it around that Harrison and I were breaking up, and Jackson had gallantly agreed to provide media cover for me—because why else would Jackson kiss me in front of an ATM camera? I mean, come on! We knew it was there the whole time—ruffled feathers had begun to smooth.
“Are you kidding? You made it easy.” She lifted her wineglass toward me. “I forgot we were pretending most of the time.”
I had too. Being around Charlotte was fun. She was just so . . . out there. Over the course of my life, I’d often faked being bold and brash to cover for nervousness or uncertainty. But Charlotte was bold and brash. She was herself. She really seemed to know herself, who she was.
I envied her.
Sienna filled a cup with water, then crossed over to the table to join us. “I don’t think there was much pretending going on tonight, except the line we told about Rae and Jackson being ‘just friends.’”
“Oh, yes. I was hoping this would come up.” Charlotte pushed her wineglass aside and leaned toward me.
I fought the urge to cover my face, shame sweeping through me and making my voice tight. “Charlotte, you are a much better woman than I, helping out your ex after he—”
“Jackson and I were never together, not really.” She flitted her hand through the air. “Yeah, we both wanted the same things, but it never would’ve worked out. He was too much of a boy scout, and he only eats boring food.”
“Boring food?” Sienna lifted an eyebrow.
“Yeah, he’s got some health things and that means he’s real strict with his diet. But it’s not just his food that’s boring. Jackson works all the time—all the time—and he volunteers his time to various do-gooder causes, and he exercises, and he fixes his boat, and that’s it. I feel like, deep down, I knew from the get-go we weren’t right for each other long-term.”
Sienna seemed intrigued. “Then why did you agree to date him in the first place?”
“Like I said, we both wanted the same thing.”
This surprised me. Jackson had said he and Charlotte didn’t want the same things. So I asked, “Which is what? What do you want?”
“I’d like to get remarried, and he said he was looking to settle down. But we didn’t have any spark. I thought, hey, he’s kinda cute, you know? Maybe I just needed to give him some time to woo me. Then maybe I’d feel more than friendly about him. Plus, I’d heard some stories.” She wiggled in her seat, her eyebrows bouncing. “An acquaintance of mine had ‘dated’ him.” She put air quotes around dated.
“What kind of stories?” Sienna propped her chin on tented fingers, fluttering her lashes.
I sank deeper into my seat, dread a wispy, swirling chill. I didn’t want to hear this. But I also did want to hear this. The thing about being around women who were truly bold and brash was that my real nature tended to surface. If you’re keeping score, my nature leans more toward clumsy than confident.
Which is likely why I said, “Campfire stories?
Sienna barked a laugh.
“Uh, no. Bedtime stories.” Charlotte winked, her grin so saucy, I wanted to call it marinara and put a label on it. “According to my friend, Jackson has a really long tongue.”
“What?” Sienna reared back, then looked at me as though to confirm.
I wiped my face of all expression.
She gasped. “Rae!”
“I said nothing.”
“But you knew!”
I shook my head, covering my face. “I do not feel comfortable talking about this.”
“Then I’ll talk about it.” I felt Charlotte nudge her fingertips against my forearm. “Jackson James. He has this—like—ridiculously long tongue. And he knows how to use it.”
Inwardly, I groaned and died a little, thinking about Jackson using his sexy kraken tongue on or with Charlotte, or anyone else but me.
But then she added, “Or so I’ve heard. He was a puritan the whole damn time we dated. I’d held out for months, for a glimpse of that thing. Nothing. Not a single sighting.”
Relief flooded through me. I’m a bad person.
“My friend talked about him like he was this magical fish who grants wishes. Except they’re all sexy wishes. And then, you know, once you’re done, you just throw him back in the ocean. If he’d actually granted any of my wishes, I wouldn’t have thrown him back.”
I winced at the description. Did a group of men exist out there that talked about me this way?
“Like, how long is this tongue?” Sienna sounded totally absorbed.
“Really, really long.” I sighed, then slapped a hand over my mouth, an ope! slipping out.
I stared at Charlotte. She stared at me.
And then she laughed. “Oh dear me! You naughty, naughty woman. Now you have to tell us everything.”
I shook my head, my hand still covering my mouth.
“No, Rae. No. You can’t stop there.” Sienna wagged her index finger in the air. “That’s like saying you received a fantastic dick pic from a stranger where the balls don’t detract from the image and then never sharing it with your girls.”
Charlotte hooted. She hooted. And this made Sienna laugh hysterically.
“I can’t. I’m sorry, I can’t,” I said from behind my hand.
“Well, why not?” Charlotte looked to Sienna, appealing to her. “Don’t tell me you caught feelings for the man after knowing him for—for—” She blinked, frowning at Sienna, then at me. “Wait a minute. Just how long have y’all known each other?”
I crossed my arms on top of the table and lowered my forehead to them, my stomach suddenly hurting.