Jack wasn't in the mood for Lyle's jokes. Pushing his wet hair out of his face, he replied, "The rain doesn't bother me."
"You know, when I was your age, it didn't bother me, either. But as I got older, I realized that wearing wet denim sucks balls."
Jack barely heard Lyle's random chatter. It was only when he heard Lyle mention Gwen's name that Jack's head whipped up.
"What was that?" said Jack.
Lyle chuckled. "Now you're listening to me. I was just asking if you two were an item."
Jack had the strongest urge to push the man into the water. Mostly it was because Lyle was smirking at him like he knew what he was asking was ridiculous.
"We're friends," growled Jack.
"You don't sound like you're happy about that. Did she friend-zone you?" Lyle slapped Jack's shoulder. "Bummer, man."
Another defensive remark was on Jack's tongue, but he held it back. Why did he care what Lyle Hutchins thought? Lyle just liked to rile people for his own amusement. He was also one of the worst gossips on Hazel Island. Jack didn't know how the man had time to winnow out information when he had his own fish to catch.
Both luckily and unluckily, Lyle's comments about Gwen ended when he noticed how dismal Jack's catches were. "Shit, is that from this morning?"
Jack snorted. "No, they're from two years ago, Lyle. Just a bunch of live salmon I've had stored on my boat."
Lyle poked at one of the salmon, clearly ignoring Jack's sarcastic comment. "It might be time for me to retire. The missus won't be pleased, but what's a man to do when the fish are this bad?"
Lyle's gaze was sympathetic now. "You gonna be okay, Benson?"
God, Jack hated pity. His jaw tight, he managed to say in a rough voice, "I'll manage."
"If you need money—"
"I'm not taking your fucking money." Jack shook his head. "Not in this life or the next."
But some hours later, the single bin of salmon in the back of his truck, Jack wondered. If he needed money, the one person who would say yes was Luke. And the thought of being in Luke's debt was unbearable.
It would mean admitting that Jack had failed. That he'd have to go begging for funds. And although Luke wouldn't lord it over him, the blow to Jack's pride would be enough to make Jack want to end the friendship. How could he look Luke in the eye as an equal after that?
No, he wouldn't ask Luke for a dime. Not for himself, at least. For Gwen, though, he would.
The thought of Gwen made Jack's stomach twist. In all honesty, he didn't know if he could still afford to give her the money that he'd promised her. But the thought of going back on his promise made him want to rage at himself.
What if Gwen took it personally? Or worse, that he was breaking his word because his idea to have an affair with her had already backfired spectacularly?
Jack pressed his forehead to the steering wheel at a stoplight. It was only when someone honked behind him that he realized the light had turned green. Considering that it was once in a blue moon that anyone on the island actually used their horn, he must've been sitting at the green light for a decent amount of time.
When Jack arrived at the bed and breakfast, he couldn't find Gwen. The entrance and dining room were empty. The kitchen was also deserted. It was only when Jack went upstairs that he heard Gwen's voice and her laughter.
At the end of the long hallway, Gwen was standing in front of an open doorway. Jack hurried toward her until he heard a man's voice replying to Gwen's.
Jack stopped. The hairs on the back of his neck rose when Gwen laughed again. Who was she talking to?
The green beast of jealousy made him clench his fists. Gwen's cheeks were pink, her hair tumbling about her shoulders. Based on the way she was smiling, she was clearly enjoying her conversation.
"Gwen," said Jack, only a few feet away now.
Gwen turned, surprise clear on her face. "Jack! Oh, I must've lost track of time." She then turned back to the open doorway. "I hope you have a good morning."
The man answered in the affirmative before Gwen shut the door. "Were you looking around for me? I'm sorry. I wasn't paying attention to the time," she said.
"You were busy," said Jack dully.
"Just welcoming a new guest, that's all. He came all the way from Los Angeles. He'd seen the great reviews and decided to stay here after he'd spent some time in Seattle." She peered more closely at Jack's face. "Are you okay?"
Jack didn't know how to respond to that question. It felt like everything around him was crumbling. He wanted to toss Gwen over his shoulder and take them far, far away from this damn island.
"My catch was shit this morning," he found himself admitting.
"Wait, do you not have any fish for me today?"
"I have fish for you. Just not as much as usual."
"Oh. That's a shame. Why was it bad?"
Jack leaned against the wall, sighing deeply. "Things have been shit for a while. Each year, it gets worse, it seems like. It used to be that you'd get one bad season but bounce back the next." He shrugged. "Not sure what I'll do."
"This has been happening for a while? Why didn't you tell me?"
Jack was surprised at the hurt in her voice. "Because it's my problem, not yours."
"Maybe, but friends tell each other things they're worried about. I've told you about plenty of things. You could, for once, let your guard down and talk to someone."
Jack didn't know what to say to that. He'd never even considered talking about this subject with Gwen or anyone else. He'd always taken care of his own problems. He'd only ever relied on himself, and it had been like that since he'd been young.
"I can't necessarily do anything about it," Gwen was saying, "but it's nice to have a shoulder to lean on."
Jack's throat felt dry. He didn't know what to say to that.
"You look like I just told you I'm a vampire who wants to suck your blood," joked Gwen.
That remark knocked him out of his stupor. Shaking his head, he replied, "Nobody's said something like that to me."
"Really? No one?"
"Weren't we talking about fish?" He desperately did not want to have this conversation. He felt like he should be lying down on a couch while some shrink asked him why he had commitment issues. I'd rather swallow knives, he thought sourly.
"Are you going to be okay? Be honest." Gwen raised her chin.
"Of course I'll be fine. Don't worry. I can take care of myself."
He stepped closer to her. He could smell her sweet scent, and he was fascinated as he watched the pulse in her throat flutter. The memory of how soft she'd been, the sounds she'd made, made desire sweep through him.
She seemed to know what he was thinking about. Gwen was chewing on her bottom lip, which made Jack want to haul her into his arms and kiss her. But then something crossed her face, and she took a step back from him.
He hated that. He hated that she seemed intent on avoiding him.
Sighing, he pushed his fingers through his still-damp hair. "Look, we can forget that night ever happened. I shouldn't have suggested it. It's my fault."