His violet gaze lowered to my mouth before slowly returning to hold my stare prisoner. “I want you because you would hate it,” he replied honestly. “You are in my way, and the only alternative I have to ensure you don’t interfere with my interests is to make you mine.”
“Why not just kill me then?” I asked, hating that the meal was turning sour in my stomach.
“Death is too fucking easy, isn’t it?” He smiled, and his focus slid to the wall of glass. “Pain is much more pleasurable than delivering death to someone. Don’t you agree?” He returned his attention to me and grinned. “There’s an art to inflicting anguish on your enemies, a simple joy in watching everything they love destroyed. They have no recourse and no way to escape, realizing all they have and everyone they’ve ever loved is slowly being rendered to ashes. The feeling of having no control over what is happening, witnessing it unfold with no power to prevent or stop it, is one that reduces them to nothing more than a broken soul. It’s more gratifying to watch it happen, knowing that I am the one responsible.”
“You’re a fucking psychopath,” I murmured as my stomach dropped to the bottom story of the restaurant.
He grinned as if I’d given him a compliment. “Maybe.” He pondered what I’d said for a moment. “I learned early on that there was little satisfaction in murdering my enemies outright. I found more pleasure from their eternal torment, knowing they had to live forever without the things they cherished most. I make no excuses for what I am or what I do to people. I provide them with a solution to a problem, and in return, they offer me a blood debt. It ensures that they never come for me, and if they do, I simply call it in and enforce its terms to be paid in full.”
“So, you can’t kill me because Enzo called in a favor.”
“Exactly, and by doing so, he left me only one option.”
“To own me,” I hissed, and he nodded his head as if this wasn’t the most insane conversation I’d ever had. “And how did that make you feel? Being denied the right to kill me?”
“Like I want to fucking murder you,” he stated coldly, smiling. I swallowed audibly, fidgeting nervously with the napkin in my lap. “But I cannot do that because I am a man of my word. So here we are, trying to decide what to do with you, Xariana. You are truly beautiful, and I find the options are unlimited for the plans I have for you.”
“You’re insane, but you know that already.” I zeroed in on the way he looked at me like he wanted to taste me carnally.
“Am I? Because you’re the one who came to dinner with a man who has repeatedly stated that he wants to own you.”
“You threatened to murder my friends.”
He shrugged. “Friends come and go. You have left me in a strange position that I don’t like. I want you, and I have never wanted anyone I wished to murder. You’re beautiful, sharp-witted, and a murderous little creature that entices me. I can’t look away from you tonight. I’m wondering if I bent you over and feed this hunger you created within me, if this need for you would dissipate.”
“And this is why I don’t date,” I uttered, placing the napkin beside my glass, glaring at him from across the table. He smirked, nodding as he stood and came around to pull my chair out. Standing, he grabbed my arm, turning me to face him. My breath caught in my lungs, stuck there while he stared at me through narrowed eyes.
“You prefer I had lied to you?” he asked carefully.
I laughed at the absurdity of his question. He pulled me closer, studying me as he leaned over, whispering into my ear.
“Your beauty saved you. It wasn’t only Enzo’s request that stayed my hand from murdering you that night. There is something about you that calls to me, and it pisses me off. If I had really wanted you dead, you would be. There are a million ways to escape making a deal, but I chose not to do so with you,” he admitted, slowly lowering his mouth to my throat, kissing his way up my jawline.
“I will not be owned, Kieran. Kill me if you must, but you will never own me,” I murmured, holding onto his jacket as I felt his lips curve into a smile. He licked the wildly beating pulse, nipping it between his teeth before he chuckled. The sound of that laugh was chilling, and yet my thighs clenched together with need.
“We’re late for the gala,” he informed, changing gears so quickly and rapidly that it left me teetering on my feet until his hand touched my lower back, guiding me to the elevator. “I now know why you were so surprised by the simple gestures I made. You’ve never been courted or known a gentleman’s touch. You merely experienced a boy pretending to be a man.”
“There’s not much of a distinction,” I informed.
“It’s the difference between being cherished and treated properly and being fucked up beside the wall in a warehouse. I assure you, the two are not the same. One leads to disappointment and a quick fuck, the other to being treasured for hours until you plead for mercy. I will show you the difference, Xariana.”
“I don’t think I want to know. You’re only interested in getting me out of your system. Not expecting anything other than dissatisfaction keeps me free of expectations.”
We got on the elevator, and he turned, staring at me with something churning behind his eyes. “You hold yourself away from people. It’s not because you think you’re unworthy of their love. It’s because you fear being hurt by them. You’ve watched others fall in love and die. You’ve seen the results of that loss. Your lifestyle has taught you that one day, you will know that pain. So you strive never to feel it, ever. You’re not broken. You’re brilliant in deciding not to have that weakness in your life. That’s why you settled for Micah. You’d hurt when he died, but you wouldn’t ever be distraught because of it, correct?”
I blinked, hating that Kieran had figured that out when I’d just discovered it myself. I shook my head, trying to argue that he wasn’t right, but I couldn’t. Licking my lips, I peered away from him, pondering how I hadn’t deduced that myself before now.
“Your mother died in childbirth, and your father raised you. It left you—wounded. You watched other mothers with their children, knowing you had killed yours when you came into this world.”
“Jesus. Are you fucking dissecting me?” I snapped, fighting the urge to step away from him. He wasn’t gentle about precarious subjects, using all the finesse of a wrecking ball to talk about them.
“I’m learning you, but I don’t have to guess that you make it difficult for anyone to know you. You’re exquisite. Your anger shines in your eyes and comes from deep within you. I bet you fuck like a wounded beast.”
Frowning, I reminded myself that he was a psychopath and that trying to reason with his words would be hopeless. He smiled, slowly closing the distance between us, then cupping my face. I stepped back as his mouth lowered, claiming mine in a kiss that left me breathless.
His tongue danced against mine, dominating it in a way that only he had ever achieved. His hand slid to my thigh, lifting it as he drew back, staring down at me. Kieran created a wealth of emotions within me, and I wasn’t certain how to handle them.
“What is it about you that I can’t ignore, little beauty?” he asked, sliding his finger to my naked pussy, leisurely rubbing his fingertip over my clit. The elevator stopped moving, and he reached over, pressing the button to keep the doors closed. “You are different from anyone else I have come across,” he continued, slowly working a circle against my clit.