Coming to a small hill, I tighten my grip on my steering wheel, hoping like heck Wyatt lowers his gears. My four by four can take it, but I’ve never tested the vans in this weather.
I glance in the rereview mirror, only for a second to confirm he’s okay and managing to handle the van okay. He is.
I let out a breath, knowing I’ll soon be back with Lily.
When my gaze goes back to the road, high-beamed lights are shining into the car, almost blinding me. My pulse accelerates, beating out of control as the red Ford on the other side of the road loses control, their car spinning out and coming right for me.
And I know without a single doubt, we are going to collide.
There is no avoiding it.
Fuck!
CHAPTER TWELVE
Lily
A sharp tug, like my insides are being pushed down, hits me in my lower stomach, and I crouch over in the hallway, taking deep, easy breaths.
Something is wrong.
I can feel it in my soul, in my heart, and I don’t know whether it’s the baby, or because of the sinking feeling I have in the pit of my stomach. I waddle down the stairs, towards the living room, needing to talk to Mum about the cramps, because I no longer think they are Braxton hicks. My nightmare plays over and over in my head, Jaxon’s words echoing in my head like someone yelling down a tunnel.
‘We’ll get her back, Lily.’
That’s what he told me in my dream.
I hit the bottom step as the living room door opens and Maddox steps out into the hall, beaming at me.
I force my expression to stay neutral, not wanting to tip him off. He’ll only worry, and I don’t want to ruin his Christmas. “Is everything okay, Maddox?”
He jerks his head into a nod. “Yeah, I was just coming to find you. Me, Amelia and the kids are going to head out early. The snow is getting worse and it’s a thirty-minute drive to her parents’ house.”
I bite my lower lip as I glance towards the door, seeing the snow outside through the small window. In a daze, I continue to stare at the white flakes coming down thicker and swallow deeply. Jaxon is out in that snow. “It’s getting dangerous out there. Is it okay to drive right now?”
“We’re just leaving to take precautions. If it gets too bad, her parents have said we can stay there.”
“Yeah,” I whisper, but I can feel the doubt in my voice. Jaxon hasn’t called or messaged me, and he left a while ago now.
He reaches out, rubbing my arm. “Hey, Jaxon will be fine if that’s who you’re worried about. He’s got a four-by-four.”
My shoulders drop and I give him a firm nod. “Please drive safely. I don’t want you getting hurt.”
“Course. I’ve got precious cargo on board.”
I smile and step into his embrace, needing his comfort. “Have I told you lately how proud I am of you?”
He grins. “No, but it never hurts to hear it.”
“I’m really proud of you,” I tell him, unable to stop my smile spreading. “And I’m happy for you. I love Amelia; she’s great.”
“Yeah, I kind of love her too.”
I giggle, ducking my head. “I’m going to miss you,” I express. “It won’t be the same without you today.”
He taps me under the chin. “You’ll do fine. Jaxon will be back soon.”
“He said he’ll call me when he’s on his way back, which he should be by now,” I murmur, unable to keep the fear from my tone.
“He’s probably taking his time because of the snow.”
I shake my head. “I factored that in when Paisley said where they are picking up Reid from.”
“It will be okay,” he assures me as he pulls me in for a hug.
“Hey, you ready to hit the road?” Amelia asks, stepping into the hallway with us.
Maddox pulls back, grinning. “Yeah. Is Jaz ready to pull herself away from my dad?”
“She’s still trying to talk him into coming. He nearly gave in twice,” she announces, and I laugh.
“She loves him,” Maddox admits.
“They’re all loveable,” I add in. “But she loves Malik.”
“You doing okay?” Amelia asks. “You’re looking a little pale.”
I nod. “I—” My phone rings and I cut off what I’m about to say when I see Reid’s name on my screen. “Hello?”
“Lily, it’s Reid,” he chokes out. I can barely hear him.
“Is everything okay?” I ask softly.
“It’s Jaxon,” he tells me, and those words, those two words, have me holding my breath.
“Lily, what’s going on?” Maddox asks, stepping closer.
My gaze goes to the floor, the blood draining from my face as I focus on Reid and what he’s saying.
“We were on our way home,” he tells me, and I hear him take in a breath, like he’s fighting for words. “Lily, I’m sorry, Jaxon’s been in an accident. I’m so fucking sorry. He isn’t—”
I stagger backwards as the line goes dead. My phone slips from my fingers and blinding pain like I’ve never felt before explodes in my head, like thick needles jamming into my skull. The room spins and black dots appear in front of me. He didn’t say the words, but I heard them. I heard them as clear as I can hear Maddox.
“Lily,” Maddox yells, reaching for me.
I fall into his arms, and he somehow manages to hold me up.
Jaxon.
I can’t breathe.
Amelia’s voice is next. “I need you to breathe in and count to three, Lily. Can you do that?”
Breathe.
Just breathe.
Millions of thoughts race through my mind, even as my body grows weaker and my heart tears apart. My lips part, yet my scream is silent.
This isn’t how we end.
This isn’t how our life together is meant to be. We have a future planned and we are going to live it.
And that isn’t going to happen if I lose him.
He has to be fine. He has to be.
And there’s only one way for me to find out. I quickly dial his number, my heart racing as I wait for the dial tone, but all I get is his voicemail.
No.
The phone slips from my fingers, dropping to the carpet with a thud. I can’t stand here and do nothing. I have to get to him, to find him.
He has to be okay.
In a haste, I gently push through Maddox and Amelia, going to the cupboard under the stairs.
“Lily, what are you doing?” Maddox calls out, and although I can feel the weight of his hand on my shoulder, I don’t feel it. I only feel the cold that has seeped into my veins.
I shove on my boots and grab my jacket, my hands shaking the entire time. A sharp cramp hits my lower abdomen, but I don’t let it deter me, even as a whimper slips free.
Maddox cuts in front of me, holding his hands up. “Wow, what do you think you are doing?”
“Get out of my way,” I order, glancing at the door. I have to go find him. Reid has to be lying.
I clutch the side of my head, squeezing my eyes closed for a moment. ‘Lily, I’m sorry, Jaxon’s been in an accident.’
His brows pinch together, and he watches me like I’m crazy. “You aren’t going out there.”