I breathe him in. The hint of cologne, sex, and sweat. I listen to his breathing, still slightly labored from our workout. I can feel his nerves. I know he doesn’t want to lose his job, but I’ll never let that happen to him.
I’m protective of him already, even after only knowing him for a few months, and I’m more than okay with that.
His body is against mine as his fingers drag over my stomach. “Construction must be one hell of a workout.”
I chuckle, the muscles in my stomach constricting when I do, and his fingers drag through the grooves. “It’s not easy, but I like it.”
I move my hand to his rock-hard bicep and squeeze the taut muscle. “How the hell do you have this body teaching kindergarten?”
“Hey, those kids are fast, and sometimes you have to chase them.” He’s joking, his tone light and easy. I smile, looking into his eyes even though it’s pretty dark in here, and he adds, “I go to the gym almost every day.”
“You have time for that?” I arch a questioning eyebrow.
“Yeah. It’s just me, you know?” There’s a sadness there I should probably dig deeper into, but he doesn’t give me a chance. “So how did trick-or-treating go?”
I laugh, thinking about my pink princess with her matching cast, owning the neighborhoods. “She loved it. I swear she got double the candy, milking that cast for all it was worth.”
His laugh is full and beautiful, filtering through the air before he tries to quiet it. “Sounds like Hailey.”
His fondness for my daughter moves something inside my heart, but I try not to read too much into it. He sits up, running his fingers through his now-disheveled hair. “I really should get going.”
“You don’t have to,” I say again, uncertain why I’m so desperate for him to stay. I’ve slept alone most of my damn life.
He turns, looking at me over his shoulder. He’s gorgeous. In the moonlight coming in through my window, with his hair a mess and his toned body naked, he’s complete perfection. “I don’t think we’re ready to explain why daddy is naked in bed with Mr. Burke.”
I grin and sit up, moving my body behind his. I wrap an arm around his waist, not caring about the sticky mess left from his orgasm, and pull him back into me, my lips finding his earlobe. “Daddy really really likes Mr. Burke.”
A soft sigh leaves his lips, making me grin before I nibble on his lobe. “You just like my cock.”
A laugh escapes my mouth, and I place a kiss to the back of his shoulder. “Not true. I love your cock. And your ass.” I kiss his other shoulder. “Your arms are phenomenal.” I kiss the middle of his back. “Your lips.”
“Rafe.” He sounds nearly pained as he turns around to face me. “I have to go before she wakes up looking for water or a snack.”
I huff, but there’s still a happiness inside me, so I can’t exactly pull off annoyed. “We can do this again though, right?”
Now he huffs, pulling off irritation a little better than me but also smiling as he pulls on his jeans. “I don’t think we should.”
I get up, handing him a towel to wipe off the mess and then sit back down on my bed. “Why not? We’re friends. We’re attracted to each other. We have unbelievably hot sex.”
He smiles, cleaning up and tossing the towel into the hamper by my door. He pulls on his shirt before coming back to my bed and sitting on the edge. “But . . .”
“But what? I’m not going to tell anyone.”
“And if Hailey finds out? We can’t expect a five year old to keep a secret. That’s not okay, and we both know it.”
I’m troubled by that for damn sure. And he’s right, I’d never ask her to keep a secret for me. “She won’t find out.”
He sighs, his head falling back slightly. “Rafe.”
“Look, just don’t take it off the table okay? We’re friends. We can hang out. And if we occasionally fall into bed with each other, who cares?”
He studies my face for a moment before cupping my cheek in his hand and leaning in to give me a quick kiss. “Okay. Friends first. And if other things happen . . .” He looks at the door and then meets my gaze again. “We have to be careful, okay?”
I nod my head eagerly, so damn relieved he isn’t straight-up telling me no.
“Okay.”
He kisses me again, and then I grab sweats to pull on before walking him to the door, both of us being quiet as we do.
“I had fun tonight,” I whisper when we reach the door.
“I did too.” His lips brush over mine softly before giving me a quick kiss and then leaving in a rush.
I can’t stop myself from grinning all the way back to my room.
I had a lot of fun tonight.
* * *
“Why are you so quiet tonight?”
I look up from my pasta I’ve barely touched and right at my best friend, Gavin. It’s been a while since I’ve seen him. He teaches high school and is the football coach, so he keeps himself pretty busy, especially during the fall. “I’m not.”
He rolls his eyes at me, taking a bite of his burger and chewing while staring at me. When he swallows, he clears his throat loudly. “Spill.”
“It’s nothing, Gavin.” I shrug. “You guys had a pretty great season, huh?”
He rolls his eyes, yet again, but then he laughs easily at me. “Stop. We’ve known each other since the second grade, and in all those years, you haven’t been able to hide anything from me.”
Damn him. “I fucked up.” I take a drink of my wine as he waits for more of an explanation. One I don’t want to give. Not that I haven’t thought about Rafe since last week. Since he fucked me and turned my world upside down because how the hell am I going to resist a repeat of that night?
“Okay, I need more information, Nols.”
I shake my head at the nickname I’ve had since before puberty. “I slept with the parent of one of my kids.”
He doesn’t look as shocked as I expected. Instead, he looks amused. “You did?”
He barely contains his laugh. “Why is that funny?”
“It’s not, it’s just so . . .” He shrugs, laughing again as he takes a drink of his beer. “It breaks the rules. You don’t do that.”
“I know.”
“Well,” He places his glass back down on the table. “Unless . . . Is he addicted to a substance? Crack maybe?”
Now I’m the one to roll my eyes. “That was once. And I didn’t know he was an addict for two months. He was really good at hiding it.”
I didn’t realize he had a problem until I found the watch my parents gave me for graduation and several other personal items missing. He’d pawned them for drug money with no intention of ever going back. “And you stayed with him for how long? A year?”
I bristle, blowing out an angry huff of air because I know I’ve messed up badly in the past. “Something like that. I wanted to help him.”
His eyes soften, and he nods his head in a sympathetic gesture. “I know. You always want to help, Nols. So is this guy, this parent of one of your kids, an addict too?”