“So that’s it. Put it in the too-hard basket and call it a day?”
After years of lusting and fantasising and wishing, it felt horribly final. Horribly unsatisfying. Maybe most guys would be happy for a few nights in bed with a woman they’d always wanted, but that wasn’t enough for Sean. Sex was great, but it was like fairy floss. Delicious and ultimately insubstantial. At some point, a man craved more. He craved commitment and plans for the future.
Talk about something you never thought you’d wish for.
“This was never meant to be anything more than a convenient arrangement.” She dropped her head. “I’m not looking for love.”
Sean knew how to take rejection on the chin—he’d spent his entire childhood having his mother call him worthless and his father coping by staying away from home. He knew how to stay strong and tall in the face of it.
“I’ve said what I wanted to say,” he replied evenly. “And we’ll see the rest of this trip out. I won’t blow your cover.”
Lily looked at him, her eyes searching his face. “Thank you.”
He’d do the right thing and make sure she got what she needed until everyone flew home on Boxing Day. But then he would go back to Patterson’s Bluff and take a long hard look at his life. If nothing else, this entire experience had shown him he was as stagnant as a car with two wheels missing.
Waiting would get him nowhere. Wishing would get him nowhere.
If Sean wanted more than to waste away in a dead-end job, while everyone around him raced ahead with their lives, then he would have to actively do something about it.
15
Three days later…
Lily had been back in LA for less than twenty-four hours, and every little thing was bothering her. Traffic on the 405 seemed worse than usual—which she hadn’t even known was possible. The man-bun-wearing barista at her favourite cafe had messed up her coffee order. And Lily had left her high-heeled boots back in Forever Falls, thanks to the hasty and careless packing job she’d done in her effort to get the hell out of Dodge as quickly as possible.
She’d been hoping to wear them to her meeting with Nina Chamberlain because the extra height made her feel more confident, and boy, did she need it right now.
Not to mention her head was a complete mess because of Sean.
She’d held it together while riding to the airport with her mum and dad, but the second they’d parted ways to go to their respective gates, it had all come flooding out. And, like a sad romcom cliché, she’d cried the entire flight to the west coast. It was so bad that the guy who’d booked the seat next to her had asked the flight attendant if he could move to another seat.
Yikes.
But at least no one had accosted her to ask about Brock. A, because her eyes were so swollen from crying that she was almost unrecognisable. And B, because she looked like she was one sniffle away from dissolving into a puddle. Maybe she’d have to remember that relentless tears were a great way to get people to leave you alone.
Lily reached up to angle her car’s rear-view mirror toward her. Her eyes were still a little bloodshot, even with eyedrops, and her concealer skills were no match for the bags under her eyes. But she’d tried. Hopefully Nina would be willing to overlook a few dark shadows. Worst-case scenario, she could claim to have partied a little too hard at the wedding.
She glanced at her phone to check the time. Ten minutes early. She’d give it a bit longer before heading in—because it was good to be punctual, but she didn’t want to come across over-eager.
Unfortunately, her entire body felt as though it was weighed down with rocks. This meeting should have had her brimming with excitement, but Lily only felt a sense of dread lodged deep in her chest. The cafe Nina had suggested for their meeting was one of those too-cool types, with effortlessly gorgeous LA folks wandering in and out. The weather was mild, and a group of young women—all super tanned, despite it being winter—walked out together.
The women reminded her a little of how she and Evie used to be. They were inseparable as kids. Always with arms linked, smiles beaming, and their laughter making music.
It had shocked Lily how hard it was to say goodbye to her family at the airport yesterday. Her mum had cried—they were a family of criers, it seemed—and even her dad had looked a little misty-eyed. She didn’t know how long it would be before she could take time off to go home and see them again.
As for Sean…
“We’re not thinking about that right now,” she said to her reflection. That was the name of the game—avoid, avoid, avoid.
She glanced at her phone again. Time to head inside. She rummaged around in her bag for lip gloss and swiped on another layer. As she was tossing the tube back into her bag, she caught sight of the notebook containing her novel idea. After accepting sleep wouldn’t come, she’d stayed up until after three a.m. last night writing by hand and losing herself in her story.
It was stupid, of course. She should be working on the script she had due. Not faffing about with a passion project.
“It’s not a passion project, it’s procrastination,” she muttered as she got out of the car, slamming the door shut behind her.
The best thing she could do for herself right now would be to forget all about Sean, her novel and her homesickness. It was time to buckle down and draw her focus back to her career.
Inside, she spotted Nina Chamberlain sitting alone with a cup and laptop in front of her. She looked even cooler in person than she did online—hair closely shaved and dyed a glowing hot pink, rich brown skin, arresting hazel eyes, and multiple gold earrings in her right ear. Lily suddenly felt a little self-conscious—and stuffy—in her dark wash jeans, tan boots and a white silky blouse.
“Nina, hi! I’m Lily Dunn.” She stuck out her hand and Nina shook it.
“It’s a pleasure. Grab a seat.” Nina closed her laptop and gestured to the menu. “Do you want anything? They do a great matcha latte here.”
“I’m okay, thanks.” Lily took a seat and slung her handbag over the back of the chair. “Thank you so much for agreeing to meet with me. I’m sure you’re flat out.”
“My pleasure. As soon as I read the samples you sent over, I knew we had to meet.” Nina smiled. She came across confident and warm, but Lily got the impression she had a spine of steel underneath her welcoming smile. You didn’t make it to her level without tenacity. “You’ve got some authentic talent, girl.”
“Thank you.”
“I love how all your movies have really captured the charm of small-town living. You make it seem so idyllic.”
It is idyllic.
It wasn’t hard for Lily to romanticise small towns in her movies. She would never be a city gal, no matter how many years she spent living in one. Her heart craved the slow-pace and the lush natural scenery and knowing that if you needed help, all you had to do was ask. In the city, she felt…
Isolated. Alone.
But lots of people felt like that. Probably.
“I mean, small towns would be dull as hell to actually live in, right?” Nina said with a knowing look. “But you sell the fantasy very well.”
Lily swallowed, forcing herself not to react. Everyone was entitled to their opinion, and she didn’t have to agree with Nina in order for them to work together.