It’s terrifying.
“How dare you say something like that,” Delilah says, her voice firm. “Maggie is my nanny, and I thought you’d give her a little respect. You can leave my house, right now.”
Sammi looks to Delilah. “We’re so sorry, D. We’ll resolve this issue.”
They all gather their stuff and leave.
Well, if that wasn’t the best show I’ve ever seen in my life.
Hugh turns to Delilah the second the door closes, and in a voice so low and so terrifying, he says, “You owe her an apology, and if you ever treat someone like that again in my home, you’ll be out on your ass. We’re strugglin’, you just made shit a whole lot fuckin’ harder.”
He reaches down, picks up Star, and then he walks out, leaving Delilah and me alone.
I stare at her, not really sure what to say.
She glares at me.
“This is all your fault. I hope you’re happy.”
She storms off, slamming the front door as she exits.
Well great.
That went super.
7
I grab at the zip of the dress, but I can’t get the stupid thing undone. I can’t lift it over my head, I can’t get it off. This hideous thing is tormenting me, and now I can’t even remove it from my body to get a little dignity back.
I don’t know why I took this stupid job; I should have known better.
I know what girls like Delilah are like. Foolish of me for believing she was actually being nice. Of course she wasn’t being nice, she’s a god damned monster. The sooner Hugh sees that the better, because I’m done with this place.
“Hey, what’re you doin’?”
I turn to see Hugh at the door, Star in his arms. She’s asleep, tucked into his chest.
“I can’t get this stupid damned dress off. I can’t get it off, which makes me feel as pathetic as she tells all her friends I am.”
Tears burst forth and roll down my cheeks as I let out a frustrated growl. Hugh walks in, carefully placing Star on the bed and placing a pillow beside her. Then he steps up toward me, placing his big hands on my shoulders to stop me from squirming. “Hush, Maggie. Stand still.”
I pause, hands dropping to my sides as his rough fingers slowly graze over my skin as he reaches for the zip. I hold my breath, the tears still rolling, but slowing as he begins unzipping me. Little by little. His body way too close to mine. His breath warm on the back of my neck. I close my eyes, not wanting to feel anything for this man, but knowing those feelings are creeping in even if I don’t want them to.
He lets the dress fall once it’s unzipped, and I’m there, in nothing but my bra and panties, holding my breath and praying that he doesn’t do anything, because I’m not entirely sure I’m strong enough to stop him. Or even if I want to after what Delilah did today. Yet, I’m better than her, I’m so much better than her. I’m not scum.
Hugh’s fingers trail over my shoulders and my skin breaks out in tiny bumps, my body reacting way too quickly to him. I close my eyes as he steps forward, his big, hard body pressing against my back as he leans down, his hot breath tickling my neck. I can’t do this. I want to, god, I want to so damned bad. But I can’t.
“Hugh,” I whisper. “I can’t.”
He pauses, his mouth right near my neck.
He exhales and leans down, pressing the longest, most gentle kiss I’ve ever received on my flesh before murmuring, “You’re makin’ this hard for me.”
I take a step forward, and turn slowly, my arms crossed over my chest. “Then I should leave. I can’t be the reason you two don’t work.”
“Trust me, you ain’t the reason. And you’re not leavin’, Star loves you and, regardless of what happens between Delilah and me, I need a nanny. Stay.”
Stay.
Stay.
I stare at him, and his eyes never once move from mine.
“Staying is dangerous,” I whisper.
“Need you, Maggie.”
God dammit.
Star starts stirring, snapping me from the moment. I turn quickly, because if I look at him for a second longer, I’ll break, and I can’t afford to break. I grab an oversized shirt I sleep in, pulling it on, and then I lean down and pick up Star, gently bouncing her as I walk out of the room.
“I’m going to put her down,” I say softly.
Hugh follows me.
I feed Star and then put her down to sleep before walking out of the house and back toward my room. Hugh stops me just past the door, his hand on my arm. “Know you’re still hurt about what happened today. Anything like that ever happens again, you tell me. We clear?”
I nod, and then walk in, shutting the door behind me.
I exhale, close my eyes, and sit on my bed.
I’m about to climb into the shower when my phone rings and I see an unknown number flash on the screen. I know exactly who it is. I don’t need this today. I don’t need Dion and his crap. I just need all the assholes in the world to leave me the hell alone. I wish they’d understand when I say I don’t want to be around them.
I hang up on the call, but it rings again.
Frustrated, I answer. “What, Dion?”
“Maggie, beautiful, what’s wrong?”
What’s wrong?
He can’t be serious.
“What’s wrong is you’re calling me and I told you not to.”
“Not this again. I thought we went through this?”
“We did. I told you it’s over. You’re still calling, why?”
“You sound upset, what’s going on?”
“Dion, I can’t deal with this right now, please.”
“Baby, what’s the matter? You know I’m here. You know I’ve got you.”
When he talks like that, my emotions lose their shit.
I start to cry, today having way too big a toll on my sensitive little soul.
“Where are you, I’m coming over.”
“You can’t,” I sob.
“Maggie, where the hell are you?”
My weakness, the one I’ve fought for so long to keep chained down inside my soul, comes undone. I need someone right now. Someone familiar. And in my emotional state, that someone is Dion. I know, I know I shouldn’t go there, and everything inside me is screaming for me not to, but I can’t stop myself as my address flows from my lips.
“I’ll be there in five.”
The phone hangs up, and it’s only then I realize what I’ve done.
I cry harder, and then I snap out of it, swiping at my eyes as realization becomes more and more bright. I just fucked up. I promised myself that I’d stay away from Dion, that I wouldn’t be so weak, and I just gave him my address in one moment where I needed someone. I have to undo this.
I have to.
Yet something inside of me is horribly attached to that man, and it’s screaming at me to just let him come by, let him hold me, let him make me feel better.
Only I know he won’t. Deep down I know he won’t.
The battle in my mind is fierce.
I get changed and then go outside and around the front so it isn’t Hugh who answers the door when he arrives. A minute later, a truck pulls up on the side of the road and turns off. Dion gets out and starts walking toward me. All my pathetic attempts in the past to stay away from this man come rushing back in as I see him striding with such confidence, such arrogance, it makes my heart pound against my ribcage.