He gives me a subtle look before sipping his drink and turning back to the group of people loitering in their living room. “I know you think I don’t notice you or care about what’s going on in your life, but you’re wrong. I know I should show it better because your mother certainly isn’t the best at expressing herself—”
I snort.
He gives me a disapproving look. “Look, she’s always been caught up in your brother’s career. It’s frustrating as hell, I get it. But have you ever thought that the reason she’s consumed by his life is because she has to be?”
“What is that supposed to mean?”
He gestures toward Noah, who’s back to ignoring Adelaide again. “Do you think that’s the first time he’s been publicly intoxicated? He’s been getting worse. Won’t say why. Sure as hell doesn’t seem like he should have many problems to drink away. And your mom is rightfully worried, same as me. Just tonight when he opened up a bottle of my best whiskey she told him if he caused a scene she’d put his ass in rehab until he sobered up and realized what a…what did she say? A twit he was being.”
Wish I was there to witness that. “I’m having trouble picturing that considering she’s always so far up his ass she can’t see past his shit.”
“Watch it,” he warns. “I know you’re upset with us, but she’s still your mother. Just like, despite his issues, Noah is your brother. There’s a lot we could have handled better over the years, but sometimes that’s how life goes. You’ve had your shit together for a lot longer than him. He needs more help than you do. It’s as simple as that.”
Simple? No. “I didn’t have a choice but to have my life together. If you guys had your way, I’d be shadowing Noah instead of doing my own thing.”
“Because we thought it’d help him if you were around.” I roll my eyes at his explanation but still listen. “He’s always looked up to you, Dairen. He used to follow you around and try getting your attention whenever he could. Hell, we were surprised he didn’t go for hockey instead of acting because he wanted to be like you. Your mother thought if you signed on to be part of his team he’d behave better.”
Pressing my lips together, I contemplate my answer. My beef has never been with Dad, so I don’t know whether to believe him or not. If he’s telling the truth, it definitely changes things.
“Regardless,” I answer carefully, “Noah is a grown ass man now. He’s only going to keep getting worse if you and Mom continue to enable him. Look what he did to me. He’s not sorry about ruining my career. The only time he acts it is if his hand is forced to. What else does he have to do before you two open your goddamn eyes and realize he needs to pull his head out of his ass and make his own mistakes without you fixing them for him?”
For once, Dad is quiet.
Blowing out a breath, I steal a glance at Addy. “It can’t be easy seeing him derail. But he won’t learn until he hits rock bottom. He has everything, Dad. It won’t kill him to lose something if it means he learns from it in the long run. Maybe he should go to rehab. Get his mind cleared. It isn’t like he can’t afford it.”
Dad puts his hand on my shoulder after he sees what I’m looking at. Who. Would I feel bad if he lost Addy? No. Not if it’s to me. “I’m glad you came, Daire. Real glad. Your mom wasn’t sure…”
My eyes give the redhead a once-over, lips twitching into a small smile. “Yeah, well, I had my reasons. Christmas miracle and all that.”
He laughs lightly. “Whatever you say, kid. I’ll take what I can get. How’s the team shaping up?”
His question makes my eyebrows pop up. My parents know what I do but they never ask more than once or twice a year about how it’s going. And he seems genuinely interested based on the smooth expression on his face. “The boys are good. Great, actually. They’ve got a decent shot at going to the end this year.”
His hand squeezes my shoulder. “Tell me about them. What are their stats? Last I heard, one of them had scouts looking at him.”
And that’s how I spend a solid hour talking to my father about hockey. Something I haven’t done in a long ass time.
Chapter 9
Adelaide
* * *
It takes two hours before I can drag Noah into a spare bedroom and close the door behind us. The noise of the party, still in full swing, is drowned out by the wood separating me and my very drunk and disgruntled friend from everyone else.
I shake my head as I turn and watch him drop down onto the edge of the mattress. He’s grasping a half-empty bottle of something clear—tequila, I think. A favorite of his mother’s that I can’t believe he swiped from the table and has been going to town on all night. “I think it’s time for some water,” I tell him, holding out the bottle I’d taken for myself. He needs it more than I do.
He glares at the offering, slurring, “I don’t want that.”
Because he’s too drunk, I manage to grab the tequila away from him and shove the water into his hands without a fight. “I know don’t want it, but you need to. Your liver is going to shut down by the time you’re thirty if you keep this up. What are you going to do when you need a transplant and can’t work until you’re healthy?”
What if you die?
I don’t voice that concern.
“You have every right to be angry for what I did. I’m angry with myself for letting my emotions get the better of me. It was wrong to do what I did with Daire.”
“Fuck him, you mean?” His glare is now directed at me as he uncaps the water and starts chugging it.
I wince but push past his harsh words. I deserve them.
His jaw ticks, eyes turning wary as he sits and watches me in silence.
“The entire time we’ve been best friends, I looked up to you and your brother. I saw two guys who knew what they wanted and went after it. You used to tease me like you couldn’t understand why I found you both so interesting. But I couldn’t help myself. You’re both driven to make the most out of your lives which is what I want too. Then I developed a crush on Dairen, and it never really went away because he was still the person I admired so much. Especially when he went after his dream to be part of the NHL. I just stopped thinking about him so much because I had you, our friendship, and my career that I was trying to build.
“I wanted so bad for there to be a day when things just…fell into place. A day when my career took off, and when Daire opened his eyes and realized how much he liked me. Loved me, even. Stupid, right? I knew what his plans in life were. I used to tell Grandma Rose about him and hockey all the time, and she said the same thing every time. ‘If it’s meant to be, it’ll happen.’ So, I let it be. Focused on my career. Got the role on the show. Solidified my part in this industry to make something of my life beyond being your friend or my mother’s daughter. You were always sweet and treated me with the kind of respect that not everybody in this industry gave me. You’ve always been my best friend, Noah.”
My friend evades my eyes.
Hesitantly, I walk up to him until he has no choice but to pay attention. “The problem is that friend I’d bragged to everybody about having stopped acting nice to me a long time ago. Do you know how many promises you’ve broken that I’ve let go of because being angry all the time was too time consuming? How many times you’ve ditched me for other people? People who are more rich, more famous than me? How many times you’ve made me go back to my apartment alone and worry because I didn’t know where you were? I was worried about you until Daire showed up at the party last night. Then I…I stopped worrying because the guy I wanted in my life was there and he was telling me you were with Brynn.”