“What?” I cried. “I never—”
“Haven’t you though?” He smiled at me. It was a smile full of patience from a man who had lived a full life, enduring the worst and celebrating the best of it. “We can all see it, Molly. You light up when Jamie walks into the room just as he does when he catches a glimpse of you. You hang on his every word and he on yours. You love him just as much as he loves you, and you’re lying to yourself every time you tell yourself you don’t.”
I wanted to argue but the churning feeling in my gut told me he was right. It would be a lie.
“Take it from an old man, love is a rare and magical thing. Do you really want to deny yourself that because you’re afraid of getting hurt?” With that, the earl walked away, leaving me dazed and confused and utterly flummoxed as I stared out at the darkening sky. He was right. I was a big, fat liar.
I don’t know how long I stood out there wrestling with the truth bomb the earl had just dropped on me so efficiently. It was liked getting slapped awake after a faint. I had been kidding myself. I’d thought I could just reject my feelings and go back to my old life, but the truth was I couldn’t. I was in love with Jamie, and I had been lying to both of us when I denied it.
I needed to see him. I needed to tell him. In a panic, I returned to the ballroom. The crowd which had seemed so delightfully authentic a few moments ago was now a hindrance as I stepped inside and scanned the throng for Jamie. I didn’t see him anywhere.
Tristan and Bri were tripping through the steps of a country dance, and I hurried up to them. “Have you seen Jamie?”
They were laughing at each other’s missteps but when they turned to me, they both sobered immediately, and I knew something was wrong.
“Where is he?” I asked.
Bri tipped her head to the side. With a pained expression, she said, “He asked us to say goodbye to you for him.”
“Why would he do that?” I felt my heart clutch in my chest.
“Because he left,” Tristan said in a gentle tone. “I don’t think he could stand the thought of watching you leave, so he wanted to go first.”
I looked at Bri. “You were right that I was afraid of aiming high. I thought I wasn’t worthy of someone like him, but I am. I make him happy.”
“Yes, you are,” Bri laughed.
“And you do, make him happy,” Tristan agreed.
“I pushed him away to protect myself, and I’ve been lying to myself and to him about my feelings. Oh, I’ve made such a mess of things,” I said.
“Maybe it’s not too late,” Bri said, hope in her eyes. “We can help look for him.”
“Where would he go?” I asked Tristan. “When he’s not at the manor?”
“He has an apartment in London, and a fishing lodge up in Scotland, and then there’s the cottage on the Amalfi coast,” Tristan said, tapping his chin in thought.
I glanced at Bri. “Of course, there is.”
“Steady, girl,” she said. Bri smiled, knowing how intimidating I found all of this.
“He could have gone to any of those places.” Tristan frowned. “He’d probably pack a few things before leaving, though.”
I started to feel frantic and then snapped my fingers. “Daniels will know.”
I danced back from them on my toes. I had to find Jamie. I had to tell him how I felt. I couldn’t let him leave. Not like this.
I hurried through the ballroom not really caring if I was making a spectacle of myself. I found Daniels just outside. I was winded as I asked, “Jamie...er...Lord Insley, have you seen him?”
Daniels took in my flushed face and ragged breath without batting an eyelash. “I believe he went to the library.”
“The library?” I frowned but then understood. “Of course!”
Jamie wouldn’t leave when his grandfather needed him, but he could hide out in the library until the event was over. It’s where I would go if I had to retreat. I hurried across the marble floor and down the hallway that led to the quiet room. I paused outside the door to catch my breath and then, before I lost my nerve, I slipped inside, closing and locking the door behind me.
“Is that you, Daniels?” a deep voice asked from the bowels of the dimly lit room.
I didn’t answer. Instead, I fussed with my dress, trying to recreate the look I’d been rocking on the very first night we’d met. I yanked my bodice down, not quite as revealing as the first time but enough to get his notice.
I strode across the library and came around the final stack of books with my hands on my hips and demanded, “What are you doing in my office?”
Jamie was tipped back in the chair with his feet propped on the desk. A glass of whiskey sat on a coaster and a stack of books were beside him, but he wasn’t reading just staring forlornly at the pile.
Jamie’s feet dropped to the carpet in surprise. He half rose. His gaze shot to my front and then up to my face. A slow smile curved his lips as he registered what I’d said.
“M. Graham, I presume?”
“Molly,” I said. “The M stands for Molly and, yes, this is my library as I’m the librarian here.”
He froze as if he didn’t want to risk any sudden moves that might alter what I’d just said.
“You’re taking the job?”
“Maybe.”
He stared at me.
“I don’t really want the job. I mean I want the job, but—” I blew out a steadying breath. “I want you more. But if I can’t have you, then I’ll take the job and hope that maybe I’ll win you in the end.”
“Aw, love,” he said. He rose to his full height and came around the desk. “You’ve had me from the first moment I saw you.”
“And you had me,” I confessed.
He pulled me close and asked, “Are you telling me what I think you’re telling me?”
“Yes,” I said. “The truth is I do believe in love at first sight because that’s what I felt for you the night I found you in my office. I think I just got it confused with indigestion.”
He laughed. “Understandable. They are a similar affliction.” He leaned his forehead against mine. “I’m in love with you, Molly Graham.”
“I’m in love with you, James Albert George Insley Whitmore,” I said. My voice was soft when I added, “And...I...believe. You make me believe.”
“Oh, love.” His voice was gruff with emotion.
I placed my mouth on his and kissed him with everything I felt, because saying the words was like invoking a magical spell that set my heart free.
It was then that I realized Bri was wrong. Finding love wasn’t about not settling by aiming high, or going for someone out of my league, it was about finding the one. It didn’t matter if he was Albert George the student or Lord Insley the viscount, I loved this man with all my heart. We were simply meant to be. When I saw the love shining in his eyes as he gazed at me, I knew he felt the exact same way.
And just like that, my childhood love of happily ever afters and fairy tales made perfect sense once again because I’d finally found mine with him.
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