Because Dean stayed home while in college, he kept in touch with a lot of our high school friends. At the bar, we met up with my old football buddy, Billy Butler, and his wife, Melanie—Jamie’s friend from art class. They have two kids now, a boy and a girl, and man, a lot can change in five years. They mentioned wanting to visit, and Jamie jumped at the chance to tell them all about the gardens. Hers, especially. We promised to keep in touch, and then we spent the night in Dean’s guest room. The following day, I took advantage of the car service Mia’s dad gave me access to, and we rode four hours north to visit Gina. Not going to lie; I was a nervous wreck. I know how much Gina means to Jamie and vice versa, and for the first time in possibly my entire life, I wanted someone to like me. Needed them to. And so I showed up with the most enormous bouquet I could find, and with Jamie by my side, I knocked on the door.
Gina was everything Jamie told me she would be. Kind, gentle, warm. It didn’t even register with me until I brought our luggage up to “Jamie’s room” that night and came back down to see Jamie sitting on the floor, in front of Gina, while Gina brushed her hair, that the place I was standing in was far more than just Gina’s house. At one point, it was Jamie’s salvation. And two doors down was her living nightmare.
I wonder if that’s what she and her therapist talked about the next day.
“Babe!” Jamie calls from the bathroom, pulling me from my thoughts.
“Coming!” I call out, making my way toward the bathroom. I grab the towel from the rack and hold it open for Jamie to step into. I start drying her off, starting with her hair.
Look.
I’m fully aware of how this looks.
Some would say I’m whipped.
Some would even call me a simp.
Ask me if I give a fuck.
“So Gina called you?” Jamie asks.
I nod. “Yeah.”
“What did she want?”
“She was asking when we’re going up next. She wants to bring me to her gardening club.”
“Awww,” Jamie coos. “So you’re going to fly up with me next time I go?”
“Yep. Obviously, I don’t like being apart from you, and you have to go to see Gina and your therapist, right?
Jamie nods beneath my touch.
I move my towel-covered hands down her neck to her shoulders. “I was thinking... maybe we could do a double therapy session. You go in first, and then we can do one together?”
She covers my hand mid-stroke, and my eyes move to hers. “You want to do therapy with me?” she asks.
“She’s helped you a lot, right?” I shrug. “I figure, it can’t hurt to ask what I can do to help you in the same way.”
“Holden…” I lose my footing, and the towel, when Jamie—in all her naked glory—throws me against the counter. She’s already unbuttoned my jeans when she asks, “Do we have time for a blowie?”
“No,” I laugh out, smacking her hand away. “Mia said to be there on time. She’s cooking so…”
Jamie drops her hand and rolls her eyes, mumbling, “Fine,” as she picks up the towel, dries herself off. “But when we get home. Your dick. My mouth. Best friends.”
41
Holden
Jamie giggles as she sits in the passenger’s seat, tapping away at her phone.
“Who the fuck’s got you smiling like that?” I ask.
“Dean.” The tapping continues. “He’s sending me these memes.”
I glance at her quickly, my eyes narrowed as I pull into Mia’s driveway. “Maybe don’t look so happy when you’re texting him.”
She drops the phone to her lap. “Aw, are you jealous?” she teases, reaching up to stroke my hair, maybe even my ego.
“Yes,” I admit, coming to a stop. I face her, adding, “Why isn’t he sending me any memes?”
Jamie busts out a laugh as she pushes open the door. “I’ll create a group…” she trails off, and I follow her eyes to Mia’s front porch.
“Mom? Holy shit!” As ridiculous as it is, I rush out of the car and hurry toward her. I haven’t seen her in months now, the longest we’ve ever gone, and I missed her. Sure, we spoke or texted almost daily, but it’s not the same. I race up the porch steps and hug her tight, lifting her off her feet. “I thought you weren’t coming back for another two weeks!”
She laughs as I put her back on solid ground, her smile matching mine. She looks different. More tanned. Fresher. As if she really needed that time away. “I wanted to surprise you!” she tells me, just as Joseph and Benny open the door. I greet Joseph with a quick handshake while Benny climbs onto my back.
“Did you cut the trip short, or…”
“We’re going back,” Mom says, shaking her head. “I was just missing…” she trails off, her gaze locking on the porch steps.
Jamie stands at the bottom, chewing her bottom lip as she looks between all of us. “Jamie, you remember my mom,” I say stupidly. Of course she does. I motion to Joseph. “And this is Joseph.”
“It’s nice to meet you,” she tells him, slowly climbing the steps.
Mia and Leo exit the house now, and Mia says, “You’ve met Dad before.”
I look at Jamie, seeing her eyes widen just slightly. “I have?” she asks quietly.
Confused, I switch my gaze between Jamie, Mia, and Joseph, again and again. “Yeah,” Mia says. “He was with me when I visited you at your work.”
“Right.” Jamie nods. “I forgot about that.”
For seconds, we just stand in awkward silence, and I’m not really sure why. “Well, it’s good to see you again, Jamie,” Mom says, her voice soft, her eyes the same. “Holden told me you were seeing each other again.”
Seeing each other? Those three words don’t really do what Jamie and I have justice. I mean, she’s living with me. I’ve spoken to Mom many times about Jamie in the past month, and she’s always seemed supportive of us. Maybe I read her wrong.
Maybe it’s harder for my mom to forgive Jamie, especially since she was the only one left to pick up the pieces when Jamie took off.
After a beat, Jamie looks at me, and then my mom, and she smiles, but I know it’s fake. Maybe she’s nervous like I was with Gina. Only with Gina, I had time to prepare. Jamie didn’t. “It’s good to see you, too, Mrs. Kovács,” she says.
Benny slaps his open palms on my head, breaking the tension. “Can I show you all the presents Papa bought me?” he asks, leaning forward to try to look at my face. “They got me lots of puzzles!”
“Sure, buddy.”
I wait for everyone else to re-enter the house and hang back with Jamie a second. “Are you good?”
“I’m fine.”
“You don’t look it.”
She smiles. Again, fake. “I was just surprised. That’s all.”
Benny plays the top of my head like drums. “Uncle Holden! They’re in my room! Come on!”
I roll my eyes and push forward, planting a kiss on Jamie’s forehead. “Will you be okay for a couple of minutes?”