“You’re calling me a gold digger?” Her expression was incredulous.
“I didn’t say that exactly. What I meant was—”
“Oh, I heard what you said. I must be with him for his money, huh? Because you see me dripping with jewels and designer handbags, huh? Because I’m wearing four-inch heels with red bottoms right now? Because if I’m not some kind of martyred saint, I’m a whore for money?”
She pulled her wrist out of his grip, then shoved him. Alex was caught off guard, and Brenne packed a lot of power in her small frame. He fell back into the mud not far from the bunkhouse, his clothing splattered with filth. He stood back up, losing his grip on his temper.
“You’re the one who gets to pick the interior designer,” he said, lacing the words with mockery. “Gotta feather that nest he bought for you. Are you looking forward to lording it over the little people of Whiskey River? ‘Look at Brenne MacAllen with a billionaire on her string.’” Alex waved his hands around while prancing in a circle around her.
“You know what?” Brenne said, shoving at him again. This time he was able to keep his footing, but her words hit him as hard as punches. “You’re pathetic. You had your chance, Alex, and you blew it. You broke it off with me, remember? You said we didn’t suit, and then you started dating your vet tech.”
“That’s not exactly correct. I didn’t even realize the charity dinner was a date until it was too late to back out.”
“I find that hard to believe,” Brenne countered. “My brother saw a photo from that night. He said you two looked mighty cozy.”
“I’m not dating Emma,” he said through gritted teeth. “I don’t want her.”
“You don’t know what you want,” she yelled, “except to torture me!”
“Do you want to talk about torture? Let’s talk about Valentine’s Day. Making me watch you with him, laughing and touching and who knows what else after he took you home!”
“And who was there with the woman he wasn’t dating? At a Valentine’s dance, no less? I’m wise to you now, Alex. I’m not going to fall for your little head games anymore. You threw me away, but then you can’t stand to see me with someone else? Well too bad. You don’t own me.”
Alex realized that everything had gone sideways, that he wasn’t going to reach her if he kept shouting at her, but the anger inside him couldn’t be repressed. “You’re right. I don’t own you. So why don’t you just fly off in your helicopter and go live happily ever after with someone who just wants to collect you? He’s going to set you on a shelf and dust you off when he’s bored. Then it’s back to conquering some new world and forgetting all about you.”
The moment the words were out of his mouth, he regretted them, but it was too late. The story of my life. Why can’t I just tell her how I feel? Why do I keep making things worse?
She recoiled, her face pale. “I’ve been in love with you since I was a damn kid. You’re the only man I ever really wanted, and even when you were only using me for sex, I still clung to my pitiful crush, hoping that someday you would come around. Now it’s clear that day is never coming. So get the hell out of my life, Alex Parsons. I never want to see you again!”
Her words hit him like a slap to the face. Alex stood there, watching as she stomped away from him, her body rigid. She didn’t turn back, but he didn’t stop watching, which meant he never saw Jim MacAllen coming.
Jim’s fist connected with his face, knocking him into the dirt a second time. “You no good, low down dog,” Jim growled. “That’s my sister you’re fucking with.” Jim kicked at him, but Alex rolled away before his boot connected.
He rolled to his knees, holding out a hand. “I’m sorry, but I—” Alex had no chance to tell Jim that he was in love with Brenne because Jim tackled him, landing them both in the dirt. Alex did what he could to fend off the blows, but he wouldn’t fight back. This is what I got coming to me. I deserve this and worse.
“Alright, that’s enough,” a voice said, and suddenly Jim’s weight was gone. It was Jack MacAllen, and he pulled Jim back from Alex. “Calm down.”
“You heard what Brenne said. This asswipe has been going behind our backs, degrading our sister. You’re not going to let him get away with that?” When Jack didn’t respond, Jim clawed his way out of his grip, but the two ranch hands Jack brought with him managed to hold Jim at bay.
“I’m sorry,” Alex’s voice broke on the words. He pulled himself up out of the dirt, feeling lower than he’d ever felt in his life. He was ashamed, mortified, and heartbroken. I should lay down in this mud and let the elements do me in.
“Take Jim into the bunkhouse to cool down,” Jack instructed.
“This is just a momentary reprieve,” Jim shouted and Ryan and Tucker dragged him away. “Just wait until Jameson hears about this. You might want to leave town while you still can!”
Jack shook his head, letting out a low whistle. “That was just about the most painful thing I have ever seen,” he said. “And Jim heard pert near all of it. You can bet he’s going straight to Jameson with it.”
Alex hunched his shoulders, hanging his head in disgrace. Getting into a verbal spat with Brenne leading to a knockdown fight with one of the MacAllen brothers was not what he’d intended when he’d come here. Somehow I’ve managed to fuck up so royally, I’ve burned my bridges with Brenne and her family.
“I would get out of here if I were you,” Jack said. “That way you can live to fight another day.”
“All the fight has gone out of me,” Alex murmured, moving in the direction of his vehicle. “I thought I was hopeless before. There’s no coming back from what just happened.”
Jack shrugged a shoulder. “Time will tell. Now get the hell out of here before an army of MacAllens string you up. I’m strong, but I can’t fight off all my brothers at once.”
Alex did as he said, driving away from the scene of his greatest failure. As he passed the big house, he saw Jameson come out onto the porch. The man watched him, his eyes not leaving Alex’s. He knows.
Everything inside of him shut down. He’d lost the woman he loved before even having a chance to tell her how he felt. Now Brenne was with Gavin, and she’d never so much as look in Alex’s direction again.
His eyes on the road, Alex sent up a prayer, one he knew would never make it all the way to heaven. “Forget the everyday miracles, Lord. I need some real divine intervention here. I know you can bring someone back from the dead, but can you un-break someone’s heart?”
In that moment, he wasn’t sure if he was talking about Brenne’s heart or his own. Not mine. It should stay broken. At least in my suffering, I’ll remember that, for a moment, she was mine.
CHAPTER 36
BRENNE
Brenne was pushing a pile of carrots around on her plate. They ran up against the hunk of roast and tumbled backward. She sighed, then started the push all over again.
Her mother coughed, and Brenne looked up to find her eyes on her. She straightened, taking a bite of the carrots and giving her mother a smile. Mama May didn’t look impressed, which meant she’d shoveled a bite of tasteless mush into her mouth for nothing.