Bella glanced down at Jack. “Don’t worry, I won’t pick anything that has to do with Jane Austen.”
Arabella
The brilliant smile that lit up Hunter’s face made my heart thunder in my chest. I loved knowing it was me who put that sparkle in his eyes simply by agreeing to watch a movie with him. It also broke my heart, knowing I was the one who’d robbed him of it so long ago.
“You cooked, I’ll clean,” he said.
“I don’t mind helping you—”
He pressed his finger to my lips and shook his head. “I’ll clean. You and Jack can find a movie to watch.”
Nodding, I fought the urge to reach up and kiss him. Instead, I headed into the living room. Hunter’s house was an open floorplan, with the kitchen at the back of the house, and the dining and living room in the front. I glanced around and noticed he didn’t have anything on his walls, which were all painted white. I knew he’d bought the house a few years back, and I was surprised he hadn’t made it more homey by now.
Jack walked up to me and bumped my hand before he jumped up onto the leather sofa. I laughed and followed him. “I take it you want me to sit down.”
The large dog laid down and placed his paw over my leg, almost in a protective manner. I scratched behind his ears. “You’re such a handsome boy. Aren’t you a handsome boy?”
Jack let out a whispered bark, then looked toward the kitchen. I leaned in closer and whispered, “Don’t worry, you’re more handsome than he is.”
He licked my face, and I let out a bubble of giggles.
“Are you flirting with my dog?”
I glanced to my left and grinned. “He started it.”
Hunter smiled. “I decided the dishes can wait. I want to spend time with you.”
“We could do them together if you want. I wash, you dry?”
He reached for my hand. “Let me show you the house first.”
Placing my hand in his, I let him pull me up. Jack jumped down and stayed at my side. I wanted to ask Hunter if this was always how Jack acted. He seemed to be very protective, always keeping an eye on me.
Hunter just stood there and stared at me, his lips pressed in a tight line. I could tell he was fighting the same urge I’d had earlier to kiss him. It would be so easy to just reach up and do it.
I stretched onto my toes and initiated the kiss we both clearly wanted.
Hunter drew me closer, and I felt his desire for me press into my stomach. Panic instantly filled my chest, but I pushed it away.
This is Hunter. It’s only Hunter. He’d never hurt me.
As if he could sense the tension, he started to pull away. I wrapped my arms around him and pressed my lips to his once more.
We both moaned softly, and I could feel Hunter easing us back down to the sofa. He turned, sat, and pulled me down so I was sitting on his lap.
“Tell me if you want me to stop,” he whispered, looking into my eyes.
“Don’t stop.”
He gently moved me so that I was lying on the sofa. He lay down next to me and placed his hand on the side of my face as he kissed me.
My body instantly turned molten hot, and I slid my hand up and under his T-shirt. The feel of his bare skin and ripped muscles under my fingers caused my body to tremble with an overwhelming wave of desire.
Then he moved more on top of me—and I lost the ability to breathe. The weight of him was both a dream and a nightmare. I quickly pressed my hands to his shoulders.
“Wait. Stop.”
I had barely spoken the word “stop” before Hunter immediately got off of me and stood.
Feeling confused, I lay there for a moment, my chest rising and falling rapidly.
“I’m sorry, Bella. I didn’t mean to…”
His voice trailed off, and I sat up quickly, then stood. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Hunter.”
He studied me with such a wary expression. I needed to tell him. God, I didn’t want to tell him. The moment he knew the truth, would he be able to touch me again? The words he’d spoken so long ago about him being the only man to touch me had replayed over and over in my head for ten years. Ten. Years. Every time I even thought about telling Hunter, the fear of him rejecting me hit me square in the chest. Deep down I never really thought he would, but a small part of me, that small part that still heard that monster’s voice saying I got what I wanted, kept me in a dark place.
“Let’s do that tour?” Hunter said with a small smile.
All I could do was nod. “O…okay.” It was clear the moment had slipped away.
Hunter laced his fingers in mine and led me over to the steps. “The bedrooms and bathrooms are all upstairs. Though there’s a half bath down here.”
I didn’t say anything as I followed him up the steps. My mind was still stuck in the previous moment. I’d wanted Hunter to touch me so much, yet the minute he was on top of me, panic had swept in.
Dammit. Will I ever be able to move past this feeling? I need to talk to someone.
Forcing myself to get back into the moment, I asked, “How many bedrooms?”
Ugh. Why did you ask about the bedrooms, Arabella?
“Three, and two bathrooms up here.”
There was a landing at the top of the steps. It had a small love seat, two beanbag chairs, and a TV on the opposite wall. It wasn’t a big space, and it screamed that a guy lived there.
“This is my office,” Hunter said as he opened the door to reveal a large desk, a dog crate, a dog bed, and a giant safe opposite the desk.
“Goodness, what do you keep in that?” I asked.
“Guns.”
I walked in and then glanced over my shoulder at him. “That would make sense.”
He smiled, and my stomach fluttered. Lord, if he wasn’t the most handsome man. Forcing myself to look somewhere other than in his eyes, I started to read all the awards and certificates on the wall.
“Wow, Hunter. This is amazing.” I stopped when I got to a bookshelf that contained books on law, criminal justice, and fishing. There were also pictures placed on the shelves. They were mostly of Hunter, Bishop, Adam, and Kyle. They were either fishing, hunting, or skiing. A few photos were of Bishop, Kyle, and Hunter on a beach. A few more showed the guys in Alaska on a fishing trip.
Another photo was of Kyle, Greer, and Hunter with two women I didn’t know. They all wore swimsuits. I wanted to ask who they were but kept moving. It wasn’t my business, and I had no right to the jealousy I currently felt. So Hunter had a picture of a woman in his office? He had continued to live his life, while I’d chosen to hide away in the safety of my bees.
It was only then I realized how much of my life I’d given up. Wasted. Years lost to someone who didn’t deserve them. I clenched my fists as I continued looking at the photos.
“That’s the trip we took to Virginia Beach. We thought we’d be able to see Aiden, but he was gone on a mission. And those are Kyle and Greer’s cousins. They came up a couple years back, and we met them at the beach.”
Looking back at the photo, I asked, “Is that Jennifer and Heather?”
He laughed. “Yes. They’re not little girls anymore. Both are married now.”
I spun around to look at him. “No way!”