“Again,” I demanded, voice a low rumble.
“Greedy. Fuck. I love you like this.” The wonder in his voice was even better than driving the good doctor to cursing. I was giving him something too. And I wanted to give him even more.
“Do it. Now. Fuck me.”
“I can do that.” Felix moved so he could take care of the condom, shedding his pajama bottoms with comical speed.
“Need me to flip?” Watching him unroll the condom and add lube was making my pulse thrum.
“No. I want to see you like this, make sure you’re doing okay.” His serious expression was exactly why we were doing this at all. He wore his caretaking like a second skin. I still wasn’t used to it. For years now, I’d been the big guy looking out for everyone else. Having someone take such careful care of me was novel, but I liked it, like an extra layer of warmth I hadn’t realized I desperately needed.
“I’m doing fucking amazing,” I said and meant it. Felix knelt between my thighs, arranging my legs until I got the idea and drew them up and back. Then he was pushing in, an unfamiliar pressure, different from a finger. Not bad. Just...different.
“Breathe,” he encouraged, reaching a hand out to stroke my stomach.
“I am.” Porn made this look a lot simpler, and breathing was a challenge when my whole body kept wanting to tense.
“It’s okay. Not a race. We can go slow.”
I wanted to level up fast, tell him I didn’t need training wheels, but I nodded, something in me trusting him to know best. He rocked forward in shallow little thrusts, and I finally remembered how to exhale. I closed my eyes, stopping my body’s chase for more thousand-watt sensations, instead seeking the floaty place where Felix knew best and where it was more about feeling good than any particular destination. Maybe I’d come. Maybe he would. I let go of the last of my expectations, let this be about how good and close I felt to Felix, how taken care of.
And then a funny thing happened along the way to my newly enlightened state. The fucking started feeling a lot better, less of an intrusion, more of a welcome fullness, all those nerve endings lighting back up until the whole room seemed brighter. I had to be glowing, it felt that damn good.
“Think we found that on switch.” Opening my eyes, I managed a strangled laugh before moaning again when he pressed even deeper still.
“We did.” His expression was both proud and tender, eyes still glassy with pleasure, but somehow he kept himself in check, setting a steady rhythm that seemed to hit that spot every damn stroke. He dragged my hand back to my cock. “Touch yourself. Make it feel good.”
“It does,” I assured him, right before he went harder and I had to groan. “Oh, fuck, it really does.”
“Make it better,” he demanded, all stern and bossy again and so fucking hot. My cock pulsed even before I gripped it. Felix taking over was the hottest thing I’d ever seen, even without the pyrotechnics happening inside me. He made an approving noise as I started to stroke. “That’s it. Fuck, Calder. You’re so sexy.”
His eyes made me burn that much brighter. “You like watching me?”
“So much.” He pushed my thigh back a little more and the new angle had us both groaning. Shameless now, I wrapped my other leg around him, tried to pull him even deeper. The deeper he thrust, the higher I flew, my hand moving in tandem with his rhythm.
My balls tightened in a way that was both familiar and brand-fucking-new. “Oh fuck. Felix. Fuck. I think I can come.”
My surprise must have come out in my voice because he laughed. “Do it. Please.”
“Yeah? You want that? Me to come for you?” Knowing he was watching made my abs quiver. So fucking hot, his intense gaze boring down on me.
“Yes. Come for me.” The little hint of sternness there, a command, made my ass clench. And then he fucked me harder and that new tension spiraled into something amazing.
“I’m close.” My whole body was trembling, more on edge than I’d ever been. My cock had never been this hard before, this urgent. I reached for the edge, but climbed higher instead, some new place where need seemed to build and build endlessly.
“I’ve got you.” Felix held me closer even as he kept fucking me, like there was no place I could go where he wouldn’t follow, no height that he wouldn’t catch me from. Nothing was too big or scary for Felix. I could shout myself hoarse, and he’d be right there, that patient voice.
He had me.
And with that, the edge stopped slipping away and instead crashed into me, my cock shooting so hard, the first shot hitting my chin. The pleasure overloaded every damn circuit in my body and I welcomed it.
“Coming.” Like he needed the advisement. But instead of laughing at my ridiculousness, he groaned low, hips pistoning faster. Oh. He really had gotten off on watching me go. That was enough to make my ass clench again, one last spurt escaping my cock as he came too.
He gave a few last lazy thrusts, riding the pleasure out for both of us, before he withdrew to flop next to me. After taking care of the condom, he cuddled close to my side, still breathing hard.
“Oh damn.” I sounded dazed, half laughing, half groaning. “Damn. I had no idea...”
“None?” He raised an eyebrow at that like thirtysomething men did not suddenly wander into their prostate for the first time. He wasn’t entirely wrong.
“Little bit of fooling around on my own, but nothing like that. No one ever asked me to bottom before.” I shrugged, arranging my hands behind my head. “Just not what people seem to want from me.”
“I want you. All of you.” His intent stare was back. Maybe it never left.
“Good.” I licked my parched lips, not sure what to do with how much I liked that nothing about me seemed to faze Felix. And this thing had never been about what I could give Felix, what he needed from me. He was a pretty damn complete package all on his own. And that he seemed to enjoy me was a fucking gift. “I like that.”
“I like you, Calder.” Still so serious as he stroked my face, touch so reverent that it had to be leaving a mark on my soul. Good. I hoped it would. I wanted him too. All of him. Whatever he could share with me.
“I like you too, Doc,” I whispered, voice thick as I gathered him even closer. This wasn’t supposed to be this damn good. The heaviness in my chest also wasn’t supposed to be happening. But hell if I could stop any of it. All I could do was try to keep him right here next to me as long as I could before the world tried to steal him away.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Felix
“It’s too big. It won’t fit.” I tried to tease rather than whine, but I’d lost track of which aisle of the home improvement store we were in, and Calder’s enthusiasm for complicated shelving systems hadn’t dimmed a bit.