“It’s a long story.”
“Good, we have three hours with nothing to do. Are you having problems with Garrett?” Dev asked.
Pandora’s box shuddered. “We’ve been married almost twenty years. I’m not surprised there’s a bump in the road.”
“What kind of bump?” Bailey asked. “Sexual? Communication? Is he leaving his dirty clothes all over the house and pissing you off? Or is it bigger?”
A group of hikers passed them. The path was narrow, twisting up the mountain, so they all shuffled around to fall into single file. Bailey picked the questioning right up after they settled.
“Is he cheating? Are you cheating? Has he done something specific?”
She blew out an annoyed breath. “It’s nothing specific, okay? He’s working too much, but he’s always done that. I think with Thomas being away at school, I’m more aware of his absences. As for sex, I don’t know—I’m going through a thing. Probably early menopause.”
“Sexual desire begins in the mind,” Dev recited. “If you don’t feel emotionally connected to your partner, it becomes harder to be physical.”
“Have you told him he needs to work less? Focus on your relationship a bit more?” Bailey asked.
“Of course. I’ve told him several times, but he explains being partner gave him a lot more responsibility and I need to support him. Be understanding.”
She felt rather than saw her sisters exchange looks. “What do you do when he’s working, Pris?” Dev asked.
Her back stiffened. Here it came. The normal snide tone where they judged her for having too much money and too much time. “I do a lot of work with charities. It keeps me busy. I run the household, do the bills, shopping, et cetera. It adds up.”
“No, I get that. But what do you do for yourself? What’s your guilty pleasure? What makes you happy?” Bailey asked.
The tightness in her chest strangled her breath. She ground her sneakers into the dirt with more force and walked harder. Instead of telling her to slow down, she heard them trot behind her, trying to keep up. Sweat gathered under her armpits and her calves twinged, but she kept her gaze focused ahead—on the one thing she could get done and behind her. Finish this damn hike.
“I like to read. I run. I watch Netflix. I take a class at the gym. I lunch with my friends. Tons of stuff.”
“It sounds like busy stuff,” Dev said. “Busy stuff can leave us really drained. Don’t you miss dancing?”
She gritted her teeth to keep from snapping. “That’s a part of my past.”
“But a part of who you are. You weren’t just enjoying some classes, Pris. You were a damn prima ballerina with the New York City Ballet. You danced in The Nutcracker. You were going to tour the world and you said no to get married and raise a family. That had to affect you in some way, especially since you tried to just remove that part of yourself like it never existed.”
The roaring grew in her ears. She clenched her sweaty fists and fought for control. Dev was pushing hard for a reaction and Pris refused to give it to her. She would not lose her temper over a choice she made willingly. How dare her sisters question her life?
“Exactly. I wasn’t about to go teaching little kids to do a holiday dance every year and pretend that meant something. I walked away and never looked back so I could focus on a new life. A very satisfying life.”
A short silence fell. Her tension began to dissipate as it lengthened. They were backing off. They understood now there was nothing wrong except her strained marriage.
“I don’t think you’re satisfied at all,” Dev finally said. She huffed and puffed between words. “I think you’re the unhappiest of all of us.”
Okay, she was done.
Pris stopped, rearing up like a stallion ready to kick some ass. “Excuse me? How dare you judge my happiness? You—who have no personal relationships to juggle so your life can be clean and bland like one of your balance sheets?” She jabbed a finger at Bailey, who watched her with wide, surprised eyes. “And you? Who floats around like commitments are beneath her, and attachments mean nothing, when inside you’re just afraid to love anything in case it’s taken away! So, please don’t pretend you both have it together. You know nothing about me or my marriage or my happiness!”
She panted, yet felt a strange release from saying it all out loud. Pris waited for the explosion, the threats and accusations back, but they both shared a satisfied glance and Dev grinned. “There we go. Finally, a real response, and none of that good crap.”
Her jaw dropped. “What?”
Bailey laughed. “I like this Pris so much better. It’s real. Come on, babe, keep walking, or marching, or running, whatever the hell you’re doing. It’s good to get that energy out. And it’s time you tell us the truth. Aren’t you tired of trying to live in a bubble? ’Cause we think you deserve more. A lot more.”
She stared at her sisters in shock. They really did understand. Or they wanted to, and she felt seen for the very first time—as if all those awful, strange emotions finally had a place to go. A strange prickling sensation strained her eyes and she was suddenly fighting back the need to weep. Instead, she spun on her heel and kept her gaze on the ground ahead.
“I don’t know if my marriage is going to make it. Every day, it’s getting harder to be in my own skin. I think I hate my life.”
Relief weakened her knees, but she straightened them back in order to keep climbing uphill.
“Now you can begin to fix it, Pris. Or blow it up. Both are good,” Dev said.
“And we’re going to help you,” Bailey said. “Now, tell us everything.”
She did. She spilled every last horrible secret on the rock climb that had her on hands and knees, and confessed she was lost as she walked on the side of a steep, sharp cliff where one false move would have her tumbling. There was no judgment from her sisters—no effort to try to give her a list of steps to accomplish in order to turn her life around. They listened, asked more questions, and gave support.
And they hiked. Dev and Bailey made no complaints as the sun burned and the sweat poured and their legs trembled with strain.
Finally, Pris realized what she’d been needing. Her family. The people who loved and knew her best—all faults included. The years and distance in the past all faded away and pinpointed to this moment.
And then they reached the top.
Pris looked out at the magnificent view and her insides began to shift. It was almost too much to take in—the sweep of cliffs and sea and sky blending together and dazzling her vision. The reverent silence even amid the crowds, who kept filtering in but spoke in hushed voices, as if they were in the Sistine Chapel. It was nature at its raw, naked self, sprawled like a queen displaying its treasure and reminding humankind they were helpless before such power.