CHAPTER FIVE
GRIM
The flower seller leaves awkward feelings hanging between us. The ease of the night so far, is long gone, I’m left wondering if Hadley sees this as something more than a pleasent evening. Because it’s been nice, and it took my mind off Mum, but the last thing I want is to start something up with Hadley. She’s not my type, and while she might intrigue me, there’s nothing romantic in it. Besides, I’ve slept with her twin, so this can never amount to anything. I decide to clear the air and take a deep breath.
“Just so we’re on the same page . . . this,” I move my hand between us, “is nothing more than a . . .” I trail off, lost for what the word is to make it sound nothing like a date.
Her cheeks redden. “It’s nothing,” she says very clearly and leaves me with no doubt that we’re on the same page.
“Great. I’m pleased we understand each other . . . it just felt weird with her—”
“Please, let’s not make it worse. I already told you, I’m not looking for a guy like you.” She almost scoffs and rolls her eyes. It’s a little uncalled for, but I force a smile anyway. “Maybe we should head back,” she adds, knocking her drink down in one. “Or if you wanna stay and, yah know, meet someone, I can make my own way.”
I laugh, picking up my own drink and doing the same. “Hadley, I’m not that much of a dick I’d let you go home alone.”
When I wake the next day, it’s almost ten o’clock. I never sleep in, so it surprises me. Heading down to the kitchen after my shower, I find everyone out apart from Brea, who’s mixing something. “There’re leftovers in the fridge,” she tells me, hardly bothering to look up from her batter.
I take the coffee pot and pour myself a cup. “Mama B, when was the last time you saw my ma?” I ask, taking a seat and scooping my finger through the mixture she’s beating. I pop it in my mouth and hum in approval. She narrows her eyes and swipes at me playfully.
“You used to do that as a kid. I let you because you were too thin when we first got you here and you needed to fatten up. Now you’re an adult, it’s not okay,” she jokes.
“I went to see her.”
Brea stops mixing and wipes her hands down her apron, keeping her eyes fixed on me. “How is she?”
“Up and down. Things seem to be up at the moment, but I’m not holding my breath.”
“I don’t remember the last time I saw her, Grim. But I can tell you I’ve never seen her looking well.”
“Did she come around looking for me when I was a kid? Yah know, after Dad took me from her?” She bites her lip, and I know she’s holding back. “B, I’m an adult now, I should know the truth, and Dad isn’t around to ask.”
Brea takes a seat. “She did come here a few times, and once, she even got a hold of you and tried to walk out, but your dad wouldn’t let her. When it came down to it, it was money she wanted and she’d threaten to take you if he didn’t hand it over. That stopped once your dad died. She knew she’d never get a penny from Eagle or the brothers.” I nod. I knew it deep down, but hearing the words out loud brings a lump to my throat. I swallow it down. “It’s an illness, Grim, just like the drink. She got herself hooked on that stuff when she was too young to understand the implications. And she didn’t know how to take care of a baby. No one showed her, and she tried, but it wasn’t good enough. We gave you a good childhood, made sure you were loved and happy, and you weren’t missing a female figure in your life.”
“I know,” I say. “Just something inside doesn’t let me stop checking in on her. I hate doing it, but I can’t just walk away like she’s nothing, which is fucked up seeing as it’s exactly what she did to me.”
Brea places her hand over mine. “I don’t think it was an easy choice. If anything, it made her worse because, suddenly, she had nothing to stop her. Nothing to fight for. She knew she’d never get you back from this club. We look after our own. And we tried to help her, I promise we did, but she was too far gone.”
“If Dad was still around, do you think he’d check in on her?”
Brea smiles. “He had a soft spot for her, that’s for sure. He’d tell you not to bother with her, but I think he’d secretly be checking she was okay, just like you are.”
I lean over the table and kiss her on the cheek. “Thanks, Mama B.”
“You know what he’d also say?” she asks, and I shake my head. “He’d ask why the hell you haven’t settled down and given him a grandbaby yet.”
I laugh, heading for the exit before we get too deep. “I ain’t making the same mistake he did, and I’ve got too much lovin’ for one woman.”
I step out for air and spot Hadley under the oak tree. As I head over, I realise it’s becoming a regular thing. “Maybe you wanna marry the tree?” I ask, smirking.
She looks up from her book. “I have a day off and thought I’d spend it wisely.”
“Normal women shop or meet friends for lunch.”
“Actually, I wanted to shop, but Mav won’t let me out without an escort. He said something is going on with the club and we can’t go out alone.”
“Right.” I dig my boot in the dirt. “Two things. One, you never go shopping, so what the hell is wrong? And two, why don’t you just take a brother?”
She laughs. “I wanted to change up my wardrobe. I’m tired of wearing baggy stuff.” I arch a brow at her confession. Hadley always wears clothes that cover her up, the bigger the better. “You said it yourself that a guy isn’t just gonna fall from the sky. So, I’m making changes, and I didn’t want to make one of the guys endure a shopping trip with me. I have no clue what I’m doing, and Meli’s busy.”
“I’ll take you,” I offer before I even think about it.
She smiles wide. “Really?”
I shrug. “I don’t have much else to do at the moment. Go tell Mav you’re heading out, and I’ll get my bike keys.”
HADLEY
The store is huge. I feel overwhelmed as we head inside and instantly doubt my decision, but I square my shoulders and internally berate myself for being so negative. I can do this. Meli always does this, so it can’t be that bad. I spent the entire night thinking about how to get Grim to notice me, like really notice me like he does my twin. I’ve spent so long in the shadows because of the way my dad treated us that I’ve been too scared to flourish for fear of embarrassing myself.
“Where do I start?” I ask.
Grim looks around, then at me with a blank expression. “Why are you asking me?”
Panic sets in again and I turn back towards the exit. “You’re right, what the hell am I doing here? And with you?”
He rushes to block my path, preventing me from leaving. “Okay, let’s just calm down and take a breath.” He looks around again. “It can’t be that hard to find some clothes, right? I’ve seen women do it before, and it doesn’t look that hard.” We’re both out of our depth, and I begin to laugh. “What’s so funny?” he asks.