“So I should sleep with him?”
Sasha chuckled. “Yes, that’s what I’m saying. Not. You should let things unfold the way they’re meant to. Go meet him. Be careful, but not so careful that you overthink things and cheat yourself of the wonder. This time don’t be who you should be—just be yourself and let him be whoever he is. Maybe you’ll click, maybe you won’t. But at least it’ll be real.”
I took another deep breath. “You’re brilliant, you know that? You could do this for a living.”
“If I wanted to but I don’t. The closer I get to my baby arriving, the less everything else matters. I don’t want someone else to raise her. I want to be a stay-at-home mom. Before you say anything, that is not a cop-out. Keeping a house and raising children is just as important as having a career.”
Her tone pulled me away from my own excitement to be there for her. “Sasha, you don’t have to convince me. I wish my mother had made better choices and been there to raise me. But even if she hadn’t died, she wouldn’t have put me first. That wasn’t her. Your baby is one lucky kid.”
Sasha sniffed. “Sorry, I’m feeling emotional today. I needed to hear that.” She let out an audible breath. “Now, back to Kal. I’m going to be sitting by the phone waiting for you to tell me all about how this date goes.”
“He offered to get some food from a restaurant so we can eat on the beach when I get there.”
“So, he’s considerate.”
“I told him no pickles.”
“You and your damn pickle aversion. Did you have a traumatic pickle incident as a child?”
“I just don’t like how they taste. I don’t think it’s deeper than that. I’m not a vinegar person.”
“I bet your grandparents put pickles on everything and told you to like it.”
Weird, they had, but I hadn’t made that connection. “How do you always know these things?”
“Because I know you. People are not all that complicated. We all want to be loved. We all resent when we feel that we have no control over our lives. You love your grandparents and for a long time you did everything you could to make them happy, but that wasn’t easy. The pickles were your rebellion.”
“Wow, when it comes to rebelling, I sure chose a pathetic hill to die on.”
“Or a safe one, one that you knew wouldn’t hurt anyone. You’ve got a big heart, Jade. And you’re a pleaser, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing. But you’re happy in Florida because you’re finally standing up for yourself and creating healthy boundaries. My only caution with Kal is that, from what you’ve said about him, he is struggling to find those for himself. You may need to be patient while he figures his out.”
Sasha’s words touched my heart. I didn’t know Kal, but I wanted to and that wouldn’t happen from one shared meal on a beach. What I needed to do was stop overthinking it and, as she’d said, let it unfold as it was meant to.
To lighten the mood, I asked, “So I shouldn’t sleep with him?”
“Lord, give me patience.”
I laughed. “I’m almost there, Sasha. Thank you for talking me through this. I feel a lot better now.”
“Good. I’ll tell Nikki what’s going on. We’ll both want details tonight . . . or tomorrow. Whenever.”
“Will do. Thanks again.” I ended the call as I pulled into the beach’s parking lot.
Kal rose to his feet and shaded his eyes with one hand when I stepped out of my car. I started walking toward him. He started walking toward me.
We met in the middle and as if it were the most natural thing in the world, he cupped my face and we kissed hungrily. There were no questions, no worries as time suspended and we gave ourselves over to a desire so primal it pushed all thoughts from my head.
His lips were demanding and skilled. His tongue teased my lips to open for him. My ability to deny him anything in that moment was zero. I surged against him, rose onto my tiptoes and craved more than was possible with our clothing on.
When he raised his head, I felt shattered and healed all at once. His breathing was as ragged as mine. The crooked smile he beamed down at me melted my heart. “Sorry. I guess I’m excited to see you.”
Evidence of how excited was straining the front of his swim trunks. My voice was breathless as I said, “I’m not complaining.”
He rested his forehead on mine. “Thank you for meeting me here.”
“You’re welcome,” I said in a strangled voice.
He tilted his head back a little so he could look into my eyes. “I loved the book you sent me.”
“You did get it.”
“I did.” He pressed his lips together then said, “I should have sent you a message then, but—”
“But?” Had he been in a relationship? Just not been interested? Did I want to know?
He searched my face for a moment. “I wasn’t in a good headspace.” He stepped back, breaking contact. “I’m still not.”
“I don’t know what that means.”
He touched the side of my face with a hand. “Are you happy in Florida?”
All I could be was honest. “Very.”
He smiled. “That matters to me more than anything else. I want to hear about your job and your life here.”
I nodded. We should talk. I glanced past him and laughed. “Did you leave our food on your towel?”
“I did.” He spun in time to witness several seagulls feasting on our dinner. “Shit. Sorry.”
Kal was even more built than I remembered. His sheer size would intimidate most people, but when he looked down at me there was none of the anger I remembered from his stage act. His boyishly guilty smile was endearing, and I laughed. “How about I buy the next round and we guard it with our lives?”
He seemed about to protest, but then nodded. “You’re on.”
We headed to the beach to collect his things then to a restaurant down the street that had outdoor tables overlooking the water.
CHAPTER EIGHT
Kal
Sitting across from Jade, with the backdrop of ocean waves behind her, I took a breath and savored the perfection of the moment. Each time I asked her a question about her job or her move she seemed surprised I was not only listening but interested.
Had no one celebrated her accomplishments? Was she unaware that the beauty of who she was on the inside brought a glow to her physical looks and made her irresistible? Smart, funny, caring . . . I would have been attracted no matter what she looked like, but she had that as well.
No, she wasn’t the type to turn every man’s head. The eyes of some men were drawn by flash and fake. Big hair, big tits, flawless skin. That wasn’t Jade. I loved her lean body, that she didn’t have a stitch of makeup on, that I wanted to kiss the freckles on the bridge of her nose, and that I’d be able to smell the ocean in her windblown hair when we fucked.
Not that we would on that visit. That wasn’t why I was there. This—seeing her, confirming that she’d made the leap to somewhere better—that’s what my soul had needed.
She ducked her head then smiled up at me shyly. “Sorry, I don’t normally talk about myself so much. You must be bored.”