“Things have been moving along quite well, thank you. The work will be great for your portfolio. I still haven’t shown you the grand reopening party plans, but I think you’ll like them. Let me pull them up.”
I start to enter the password into my computer to pull up the distraction that I hope can keep any discussions of us at bay, but Dexter is already on the move. My pulse pounds heavily through my veins as I watch him in my peripheral until he’s leaning against the desk, facing me.
“Bexley likes you.”
I let out an uncomfortable laugh. “Well, yeah. That’s a good thing, right?” I dare a look up at Dexter, my heart pounding in my chest.
“I mean,” Dexter says, “he likes you, likes you. As in, he wants to fuck you.”
My next breath comes quicker than I’m ready for, causing me to choke a little while my eyes widen. “Jesus, Dexter. Don’t beat around the bush or anything.” I let my eyes roll into the back of my head and aim my focus back at my computer, furiously tapping away while trying to remember what I was looking for to begin with.
“Clearly, you already know. You’re avoiding the subject.”
My jaw clenches as I try desperately to remain composed. “I’m avoiding the subject because it’s inappropriate. Where on earth did that come from anyway?”
Dexter shrugs. “The way he speaks about you. He’s clearly fond of you, and it’s not a secret that you two have a history since you worked here and all, but I can’t help but wonder if…”
I take in a slow, deep breath while waiting for him to finish his sentence. When he doesn’t, I’m too curious not to ask. “Wonder if what?”
“If his feelings are returned. You think I haven’t learned how to read your body language, Hope? After all these months of watching you and working with you and fucking you more times than I can count?” My neck and face heat at his words. “I can see that there’s something different about you, just in these few minutes I’ve been in this office.”
I lean back in my chair, worry filling my mind. “You’re being ridiculous.”
He tilts his head. “Am I? I’m realizing you never did tell me why you quit your job here.”
“Then you aren’t remembering my interview. I was very clear that I loved my job here, but I’d always wanted to move to the city and give a true marketing job a shot. Working here didn’t really lend to the types of opportunities I thought I would have at Urgency.”
Dexter frowns. “Thought you would have? As in, you haven’t received those opportunities?”
I sigh, frustration blowing through me. This conversation is exhausting, just like all my conversations with Dexter lately. “You’ve given me plenty of opportunities that I’m very appreciative for, but you still don’t trust me. You still question every decision I make, client approved or not. You still show up to my job sites like you’re here to be some hero in case my client isn’t happy with my work. Is that really why you’re here, Dexter?”
His face turns a shade of red I don’t think I’ve ever seen before, and I swear he’s about to blow. “Are you fucking kidding me right now?” he booms. “I’m not here because I don’t trust your capabilities. I’m here to see you. A week ago, we were talking about making things official, and now you treat me as though you aren’t the least bit happy I’m here.”
I turn my head down, ashamed of all the things I’m hiding and scared of all the things I want but can’t gather the courage to say.
“Do you want me to go? Will that make you feel trusted?”
Yes, my mind screams, but I can’t possibly say that to him. As much of a jerk as he can be, and as hard as he’s being on me right now, he isn’t the one in the wrong here. I am. “No,” I say, almost too quietly for him to hear, so I clear my voice and meet his eyes. “You should stay. We have dinner plans with Anderson.”
There’s too much at stake. If I tell Dexter the truth—that it’s over, that I’m in love with the man I could never let go of—then I’ll be fired in a heartbeat. And then what? I’ll lose my job and all the training that comes with it. I’ll lose my promotion. I’ll lose my benefits, which include the college classes I’ve been taking in my spare time so I can finally get my bachelor’s degree. But then on the flip side, if I continue with this lie, I could lose Anderson.
I stand and place my hands on Dexter’s chest, attempting to calm him down before Anderson gets back. “I’m glad you’re here. Please, can we drop all of this for now?”
His expression softens almost instantaneously. He blows out a breath and shakes his head. “Yes, of course.” His hands slide around my waist as he tilts his chin, hinting at what he wants, but my lips belong to someone else now.
I peel myself away with an awkward laugh. “This isn’t your office, Dexter. Let’s not disrespect our client.”
A flash of anger lights up his eyes, and maybe a little understanding too. “I wouldn’t dream of it.”
“Tell me about growing up in Orcas Island,” Dexter says. “I can’t imagine living somewhere so… desolate.”
We’re down the road at Anderson’s favorite diner, a small hole-in-the-wall establishment that looks like it still exists in the sixties. I almost burst out laughing when we first arrived, knowing Anderson probably chose this place on purpose. He isn’t clueless about Dexter’s posh preferences and isn’t afraid to play to one’s discomforts if need be. Somehow, I sense that Anderson isn’t all that fond of my uptight boss. After Dexter’s subtle insult, I can understand why.
Seemingly unaffected, Anderson shrugs while toying with the straw to his glass of water. “It was all I knew. We worked hard and played even harder. My brothers and I started working as soon as we could walk, doing various chores around the land until we eventually figured out what suited us all best.”
Dexter leans back in his chair, a curious expression resting on his face. “So, that’s the simple life, huh?”
“If by simple you mean we’re not polluting the air with skyscrapers and fancy cars in traffic jams, then I suppose so.”
Dexter throws back his head and laughs before continuing with the inquisition. “What about schooling? Are there any good programs over here?”
“We have schools just like up in Seattle. Only in grade school our gym classes consisted more of nature walks, horseback riding, and swimming in the lake.”
“What about college?”
“There are plenty of opportunities on the island. There’s even a small college, which is where I went.”
Dexter looks taken aback. “You don’t say. What area of study?”
“Environmental Science, specifically Natural resources and conservation.”
Dexter chuckles. “Of course. I should have guessed.”
Anderson smiles. “And let me guess. You went to a private college and have a double major. Am I right?”
“Right so far.” Dexter winks and salutes the air with his glass of merlot. “Can you guess which ones?”
“Business, of course,” Anderson starts. “And marketing.”